They blew up Tixas Stadium today. They loaded it up with explosives and once again made it one with the same Earth to which we will all one day be consigned. It had a field crown like you wouldn’t believe and a hole in the roof so the faithful in the stands could see their God and vice versa. It was the home field of five Super Bowl champions and two other conference champions.

In other words, YEEEEE HAAAAWWWWWW I WANNA HAVE SEX ON TOP OF THOSE SMITHEREENS!