The ’72 Dolphins are drowning in as much champagne as any casual fan trying to get through a Sunday night game that matters only to fans of an overrated NFC East. As annoying as Mercury Morris can be, he’s far less grating than the fat humps that will spend the entirety of their lives spitting tater bits on anyone within mouthshot about their 19-0 season. The ‘Phins folks will at least die soon.
For those willing to brave this game, hope Dallas will lose just so Week 17 isn’t completely meaningless for the NFC. Or that the Redskins run another swinging gate to hilarious effect.
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Ape, please use that picture somehow, just for the sheer awesome.
They ruined it. Now who wants to get greatness. Perfect season? Nobody.
Thanks God those annoying Pats fans never got to bloat about going 19-0
fans of an overrated NFC East
/immediately assumes Ape wrote this
//pats self on back
///whines for six straight hours about anti-Cowboys bias
I don’t know why, but I feel like the whole Urban Meyer thing was what pro wrestling fans call a ‘work’. Think about it. He’s been having heart pains since the SEC title game, this suddenly comes out the one time Florida doesn’t get into the national title game, he retires, but watches a ‘spirited and emotional’ practice by his team and decides he’s going to come back next year.
Reeks of campy football movie bullshit. Reeks of it i tells you.
The wrong Mercury died of AIDS.
Cowboys win bitches!!!! WHOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Lick the sweaty taint Giants fans!
/drinks Gatorade to kill the hangover
//Shoots off 6-shooters
///gets playoff tickets
Wonder how many Giants are going to be buried in the rubble of the old stadium. I’m so fucking glad I didn’t watch that game. I had more fun at a 7 year old’s birthday party. It didn’t help that my kids insisted on listening to the game on the radio in the car and asking me every 2 minutes what the score was and whether the Giants were going to win. I then told them the story of kids who were Browns fans and they were OK with the Giants laying an absolute Osi Patty.
@Necro. That’s awesome!!
Hey, tonight we get to watch THIS GUY slobber all over Farve and show clips of when he was a Packers assistant 30 years ago!
why didn’t nbc rip the iggles/cowboys game from fox? wouldn’t that satisify the ratings numbers better than watching the pussytubers get their free pass to the playoffs stamped? or are they that tired of fellating JJ?
/prays that bengals get to play indy in the second round.
I don’t get it – if the Colts plan was to not give a fuck about these last 2 games since they’re “meaningless,” why did they play any starters at all in this game? I call bullshit.
That is the genius of the plan. Colts fans can now claim that they could have gone undefeated, if only they had tried. It’s like the perfect loophole for fat losers.
/Pats still have longest winning streak if playoffs are included
//Ape might claim that official winning streaks are dumb, but he enjoys that the Steelers ended said streak
That’s terrifying, Necro.
YEP. That’s my Redskins. They could’ve had a perfect season, but they accidentally won a few games.
Dammit.
I could live with the fat humps being obnoxious in exchange for Simmons from Quinzee having to forever deal with the fact that another team went 19-0, and the Greatriots didn’t.
The NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE is fucking retarded for flexing that Bengals/Jets game. Cincy is gonna play their starters for, like, a quarter. It’s going to be an incredibly boring 2nd half at the very least. Oh but wait- I almost forgot- a team from New York is involved! THAT’S why a national audience will be subjected to that borefest. Sorry, just had to talk myself through that one.
/Not from Boston
/Not from Philly
/Not from LA
/From a landlocked state no one gives a shit about
/Just really hates New York’s teams, all of them, especially the Jets
Time for Phillip Rivers to go all Avatar… http://yfrog.com/jd1261972103166j
Thank god next week is the last night of Sunday Night Football for this season. As of late it seems to be known as “that music video of Faith Hill with some lame one-sided blowout or game of 2 inept injury depleted teams playing each other.”
Wait whats next week? Bengals/Jets? Yeah this one should be a great one to watch. 1 team that doesn’t give a shit against a team who can’t do shit. See you next season Al and Obvious Collinsworth.
SNF – PussyTubers /v/ Bengalis?? that should be a great live blog. Gonna be shit loads of offside penalties, ochocinco getting knocked out/killed by Rex’s boys, and Ced Benson running apeshit
“This guy!”
THIS GUY will bring home the fantasy glory,
http://i.cdn.turner.com/sivault/multimedia/photo_gallery/0806/nba.finals.celebrity.picks/images/robbie-gould.jpg
Can I at least get a little lubrication prior to the plooking, your highness?
/Call me Beecher.
//Gat Dammit
Will Jerry leave a box of fresh Krispy Kremes on Wade’s desk as a playoff reward?
I’m down by 11 in my FF championship game but…I still have Robby Gould!
And they have the Vikings defense.
And I’m a life long Vikings fan.
Fuck fantasy.
SKOL Vikings!
I’ll take reality football for 100, Alex!
Sorry kids, but I’m gonna hafta ask you back for them gift cards. Fucking recession! Joo understand, No?
December swoonless!
Marion Barber: /Playoff door busts open, is broken into 1,000 shattered pieces…
Cris Collinsworth is reminded of calculus when reviewing the AFC’s playoff scenarios. The NFC scenarios are more like first grade math.
Garrett fail.
WOW, you got to be kidding me. I don’t think I’ve seen so many short inches fail since the last time I tried to sex up a girl.
Needs more Folk.
1. Tebow will lay hands on Urban and heal him.
2. If you’re a Skins fan, does Laron Landry trying to cover Witten remind you of ol Roy Williams trying to cover – anybody?
3. When Marion Barber hit the ground, the dust particles exploded into smaller dust particles.
Bengals vs Jets is next week Sunday Night Game?
Oh, that has to be a live blog.
//or not, because, really, it’s the fucking Bengals and Jets.
Collinsworth wants that 4 year old.
Can any more makeup be caked on Kremer’s face?
And not enough of that damned song. It should play during every commercial break just to remind us of the glory of Boston sports.
Not enough mention of the winter classic.
Pickerception!!
wow, how shitty is Laron Landry ?!
@jobe
that’s what she said.
/yes, I said it
/shows self out
Swinging gate? That was a “water bucket.” Please get your antiquated potential fake field goal formations correct.
Am I looking forward to tomorrow night’s chatblogkakke? Whatever.
Soooo…….funny story…..
I saw this post and was gonna look up Nacho’s stats for shits and giggles (turns out they were just bleh….meh), when I had an aneurysm and typed MATT Sanchez instead of MARK!
Yeah….
*Looks at ground kicks dirt*
Not the same person eh….
/PoFlaLGBTWar!
@obit_rice
Fucking priceless…and very creepy.
whenever i hear collinsworth, i automatically think back to that video where he talks about money and jailbait.
Crish Collinshworth ish a mushmouth. Listen to him talk about the “pash-rush.”
@ JL
if you are gonna harp on that can you also include the “clearly past the line of scrimmage TD pass by Alex Smith that was ruled a TD after replay”
Fucking refs, its nots enough they screw up real NFL games they gotta fuck with fantasy games too.
/still won Fuck You refs
So, is Urban Meyer in or out?
Drunk on vodka and hubris.
JL – don’t forget the Broncos first round pick
Here is a list of things I am drunk on:
1.) Power
2.) VICTORY!!!!!!!
3.) Vodka mixed with Diet 7-Up and Fruit Punch low-calorie Gatorade
4.) Shame of my favorite football team
5.) Paint thinner
I think that’s enough intoxication to allow me to do this:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/103836/the-league-illegal-motion#s-p3-sr-i1
Moss for Meast, Colts for least. Cassel’s TD Machines are champeens!
JL is drunk with power
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ohu65lYYmkA
ok – strictly a fantasy rant here as I am not a fan of the GREATEST DYNESTY EVAH.
But – how could Maroney have fumbled it after having crossed the goal line? if you saw the play, you know that the ball bounced back to the 1 from out of the end zone. NO ONE DENIES THIS
I also got to enjoy Peyton and Reggie leaving my team today as well. That, however, was buyer beware – no right to bitch.
haha all the pats fans i know are writing happy statuses about the colts on facebook now.
18-1, fuckos.
Not true, Ape; Super Bowl XVI (San Francisco vs. Cincinnati) will always burn deep in my soul. But this fabulous, completely irrelevant event to everyone except me….it eases the pain.
DAMN YOU, JOHN TAYLOR!!!
I don’t get it – if the Colts plan was to not give a fuck about these last 2 games since they’re “meaningless,” why did they play any starters at all in this game? I call bullshit.
Congrats, J.L. Perhaps this will get you to stop carping about a certain Super Bowl.
God, those fat hump Colts fans sure are insufferable, always blabbing on about how good their favorite team is, like anyone else gives a crap. I’m glad they finally lost. It’s rude to gloat about something in a completely-unrelated thread.
Besides, what’s truly important is that I FUCKING WON MY FANTASY FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP! SUCK ON THAT, MILLIONS UPON MILLIONS OF OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT EVEN IN THE SAME LEAGUE!!!!
hyper-hyped up NFL diversion so we don’t think about how shitty the distribution of waelth is in this country
‘business structure of the dallas cowboys’ – bob costas sucking jerry jones’ dick; it’s all for the fans says jerry jones, before boarding his private jet and drinking 60 year old single malt scotch (giving costas a drop)
Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
That’s the way to KILL, men!
Did Maj go to the game?
I cannot wait to see KSKoach Ryan’s reaction to this.
Pussytubers 1 Fat Humps 0
Well, I may be biased, but I really don’t think we’re that bad. You’re not going to see Colts fans blowing shit up after a playoff win.
@IrishCream
Yeah, any fans of a perfect team would be annoying. But THESE fans, of THIS team, are so very annoying on THIS VERY BLOG.
I say this knowing full well that I would become insufferable if the Jets were ever able to pussytube their way to a perfect season.
I think it’s safe to say any fan base would be annoying with a perfect season
Would you rather have had Tawmmy gloating about the Football Celtic’s perfect season had they not fortunately choked?