NSFW language & (shocker) gay slurs.

Item first. The Philadelphia Mensa chapter posted this video of them taunting Brandon Jacobs before the first Iggles-Giants game this season. Jacobs can’t help but remind this brain trust of Philly’s earlier loss to the Raiders. I don’t understand why Jacobs thinks this is an insult. There’s no shame it in a narrow defeat at the hands of the mighty S&B. [ OTR ]

Item two. Atlanta Falcons’ defensive tackle Justin Jonathan Babineaux apologized for his recent arrest after he was pulled over with a shitton of weed in his car. “I want to apologize to Mr. Blank, coach Smith and Thomas Dimitroff and also the fans, most importantly,” said the fifth year veteran out of Iowa. “I’m embarrassed to be standing here in front of you guys, but as you guys are all aware, it’s an ongoing legal matter and I can’t talk about it or answer any ques—Hey man, did you ever notice what a weird name I have… Baaaa-buh-no. Buh-buh-Babineaux! Babineauxbabineauxbabineaux. Sheeeeeit man, I need to get some Pop Tarts. Where the hell did I put my keys?”

TGJrItem three: Zulu Cthulhu is telling people that Ted Ginn, Jr. was a no-show for an impromptu match race in the streets of Miami earlier this year. Mike Berardino at SunSentinel.com reports that Chris Johnson says he encountered Ginn and Joey Porter at a party where he issued a challenge:

“It was real,” Johnson said Wednesday during a conference call with South Florida reporters. “We were at a pool party and [Ginn] was talking. I said, ‘Let’s go.’ We were going to race down Ocean Drive there in Miami.”

Johnson, wearing tennis shoes, said he headed down to the street, ready to race, a crowd no doubt gathering for this historic event between two track stars turned NFL ballers. Bengals WR Chad Ochocinco was there. So was Titans quarterback Vince Young. It was really going to happen, except for one little problem.

“[Ginn] never showed up,” Johnson said.

Maybe the stakes weren’t high enough to get Ginn (pictured at left) to show up. Johnson should have pulled a Danny Zuko and challenged Ginn to race for pinks.

When confronted about his absence, Ginn was defensive. “Nah man, I was there. I was just movin’ so fast they couldn’t see me. Like the Flash an’ shit. Watch this, Imma run across this room and back. PEEE-OOW! Back already. It prolly looked like I didn’t move at all. That’s how fast this enGINNe runs, son.” [ thx Lt. Winslow ]