Smokin’ hot chicks!!! Smokin’ hot 4pm open thread!!!
Best episode of “Scrubs” ever.
Today’s lackluster slate of games continues…
Chicago at Minnesota – NFL.com recommends that fantasy owners start Purple Jesus against the Bears today. Thanks to the Shield for that otherwise unobtainable nugget of wisdom. They also recommend against sticking your dick in a piranha tank.
Kansas City at San Diego – Can the Chefs make it three in a row? No, they cannot.
Jacksonville at San Francisco – The Jaguars have won four of their last five games. The Niners are losers of five of their last six. Meanwhile, Peter King retweets the musings of someone named “blumpkinfarts”:
Arizona at Tennessee – Kurt Warner is still feeling the effects of last week’s concussion and will not start today. If backup Matt Leinart gets the win (doubtful), he’s partying at The Valley Ball tomorrow night.
[ via Uncoached & Cajun Boy ]
Tags: just one more loss until Singletary goes bareass, o snap guess what I saw o snap guess what I saw o snap guess what I saw, open threads
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November 29th, 2009 at 4:13 pm
Can anyone get screencaps of Zorn whispering to someone not paying any attention to him? This is prime comedy. Poor lame duck.
November 29th, 2009 at 4:18 pm
This just gets funnier; I think it was Moose Johnston that just claimed Jim Zorn a heck of a coach for getting his team to play hard even with no shot at the playoffs….
November 29th, 2009 at 4:36 pm
Ever heard of a pump fake Casshole?
November 29th, 2009 at 4:47 pm
I said this in the liveblog, but I’ll say it again. Chris Johnson > Adrian Peterson. AD needs to hire Tiki Barber, STAT
November 29th, 2009 at 4:49 pm
Hahhahahahaha SACK Favre.!
November 29th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
chris johnson = teal mohammad
November 29th, 2009 at 5:00 pm
Will the idiot calling plays in San Fran please run Gore for the love of God?
Also, FLOOOOAAAAAAAAT to Floyd.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:04 pm
Best episode of “Scrubs” ever.
Least gay episode of “Scrubs” ever.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:14 pm
SKÅL VIKINGS!
November 29th, 2009 at 5:15 pm
Two things:
1) Apparently the Colts have reached “Never change the channel when they’re playing” status. No matter the point differential, I wouldn’t bet on anyone to beat the Colts in four quarters of football. Watching these games makes me understand what it’s like to be bipolar; I go from “we’re totally gonna win this game” to “there’s no way we win this game” to “oh my god I can’t believe we might actually win this game” to “holy fuck we just won that game”.
2) To the national media, and anyone that picks the Texans: A) as someone said earlier, this is why the Texans can’t have nice things, and B) just lock the Colts in for 12 wins and an AFC South title until proven otherwise.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
Who are the Bears employing upstairs to advise on whether or not to challenge? Now there’s someone who needs a good firing.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:19 pm
lovie smith makes a retarded challenge?
color me shocked
November 29th, 2009 at 5:20 pm
Worst of all, I have to agree with Joe Buck when he asks “why do coaches just give away timeouts”… but let’s see what PedoChilly counters with.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:23 pm
Anytime Joe Buck calls you out, its time to quit.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:25 pm
Never, EVER order the Pedo Chili. It will not agree with you.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:30 pm
That was one damn fine pick, Mr. Griffin.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:31 pm
Cutlersulkerception. Needs to be set to music. Id suggest “Nobody Does it Better” song.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
Prince, you’re a Sexy Motherfucker.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
Is Cutler the worst QB in the division yet? Stafford at least a 5-TD game to point to.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:42 pm
“This always turns into a Favre lovefest”
Joe Buck: now with self-awareness.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
Joe Buck admitted that every Vikings game turns into a Favre-love fest…and then proceeded to lovingly wrap his lips around the Favre’s dick.
November 29th, 2009 at 5:43 pm
Damnit Taxman…
November 29th, 2009 at 5:50 pm
tight end Shiancoe is a pretty big target to stick it in
November 29th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Monkey Business:
If you have friends, please share your overlong ramblings on the Colts with them and them alone. If you lack friends, please acquire some. Or kill yourself. Just shut the fuck up.
/Internet access in the stadium is a double-edged sword.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:35 pm
The Radio Shack commercial with Biz Markie is like a 30 second shroom trip.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:40 pm
Holy Batshit I just looked at the KC/SD score. 14 / 40!!!
November 29th, 2009 at 6:41 pm
@Christmas Ape
Bwahahahahahahahahaha. Okay, okay. I get it. It’s annoying. I’m not that funny ITT. No one gives a shit about the Colts. Peyton Manning has a giant forehead, etc. etc. etc.
Still, this is what happens to long-suffering fanbases after they get a taste of success. Especially when it’s just a ridiculous level of success. If you think I’m bad, wait until the Lions and Browns actually become good.
Hahaha, who am I kidding? The Lions and Browns will always be terrible.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:44 pm
Since when the hell are the COLTS a suffering fanbase? Are you retarded or did you just put the DeLorean in reverse? You’re about 5 years late on that statement.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:45 pm
Troy Aikman just sounded like every Jets and Packers fan I know. “Don’t worry. Favre is gonna start throwing picks any minute now.”
November 29th, 2009 at 6:47 pm
Death has selected you Monkey Business, we have found you have no non-gay friends.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:48 pm
Is Peanut Tillman doing field sobriety test?
November 29th, 2009 at 6:50 pm
Reggie Miller and the Pacers are going to surprise you all this year.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:51 pm
Hey Alex Smith, I know you suck. I mean, you can barely pass on the Jags. But at the very least would you stop throwing negative yardage completions to Gore?
/sounds like a broken record.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Boatdrinks, the surprising thing is that the Chiefs scored 14.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:54 pm
Speaking of shroom trip, MB apparently on one. 2001: 6 and 10 (last losing season.) Before that: 1998 and 1997 3 and 13. However, 9 and 7 the previous two years 1996 and 1995.
Dude, that ain’t no long suffering. I will admit once the winning started with Peyton and Tony it took a while win Super Bowl. But really. LONG SUFFERING????
November 29th, 2009 at 6:55 pm
I think the suffering comes from living in Indiana.
November 29th, 2009 at 6:59 pm
God bless you, Jared Allen, you raving redneck lunatic.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:03 pm
Purple Jesus is turning into Purple Judas.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:04 pm
As a Buffalo Bills fan, I would take MB’s “long suffering” any day of the fuckin week.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:04 pm
I hate fox. VY is driving and we are stuck watching 3 yard runs by peterson.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:04 pm
Hey Zona…the only thing the prevent defense does is prevent you from winning. Careful now son.
/screw Zona
//screw Titans
///I just hate bad D
November 29th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Also notable from @blumpkinfarts: “I’d fuck Oprah”
November 29th, 2009 at 7:06 pm
Indianapolis had the Colts for all of 14 years before Peyton showed up. Sure, four of those were 10+ loss seasons, but they had three playoff appearances too, including a trip to the AFC Championship in 1995. Hardly a tortured fanbase in Indy.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:10 pm
Adrian Peterson’s Stigmata is mostly under control today.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:10 pm
Finally Peterson. The Vikings goal line running offense is frustrating as all hell. AP needs it from 7 out instead of 1, otherwise he runs into the back of linemen and falls down, or worse.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:11 pm
Thank you Xmas Ape for the trip down memory lane.
Let’s all remember Jimmy Harbaugh as Captain Comeback. And now the agitator of all things Pete Carroll.
And the bullshit hail mary vs Pittsburgh.
/ducks
November 29th, 2009 at 7:11 pm
Monkey Business:
People who non-ironically type out their laughter (”Hahahaha”) are goddamn retards.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
Just throwing this out there Burger King, but a football game may not be the time to advertise a Twilight-themed combo.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
…And I don’t even give a shit about your Colts take.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:17 pm
@Taxman: Bingo. Indiana: where the women are mediocre and the soybeans are pretty good looking.
@Visanthe Shiancoe’s horse cock: Blame Ralph Wilson. He’s the one that ran Bill Polian out of town.
@Christmas Ape: Worth noting that the 1995 Colts were called the Cardiac Colts, at least locally, for their propensity to give the locals heart attacks, due to the high quantity of deep fried pork tenderloin and razor thin Colts wins and losses. And the Colts got jobbed in the 1995 AFC Championship against the Steelers. And the 2004 AFC Championship against the Pats.
Also worth noting: The Colts are officially the first team in the playoffs this season.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:19 pm
Programming Note: Pam Oliver still brings that hot chocolate to the broadcast- and fuck you if you disagree.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:20 pm
I’m pretty sure Vince Young can never, ever lose to Matt Leinart.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:20 pm
TARVARIS TIME!
November 29th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
So, Vince Young throws for 387 and the winning TD. God-DAMN, that was a great last drive.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:24 pm
MB, I’d ask you why you can’t just quit while you’re ahead, but you were never ahead. But seriously, you should quit.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:24 pm
Glad someone saw it Noise. We are in garbage time, but could Fox cutaway? Obviously not.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:25 pm
@Signal to Noise: …And 99 yards for the winning TD. If he wins the Meast, will he take his shirt off?
November 29th, 2009 at 7:25 pm
Boatdrinks – it totally justified the extra $7 a month on the cable bill for NFL RedZone.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:28 pm
GoesTo11 – at this point I think VY could probably go streaking through the entire Nashville metro area and no one would mind at all.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:37 pm
Jimmy Johnson does not understand the whole Vince Young Matt Leinhart thing clearly.
November 29th, 2009 at 7:56 pm
And the Colts got jobbed in the 1995 AFC Championship against the Steelers. And the 2004 AFC Championship against the Pats.
If by, “jobbed” you mean “were the inferior team and deserved to lose and thus did”, then I agree. Also, the 2004 AFC Title game was Pats and Steelers. You’re thinking of the ‘03 game. At least be accurate in your asinine rantings.
November 29th, 2009 at 8:05 pm
Oh, I’m sure the Colts somehow got jobbed in ‘03 too. They’re like the Ravens.
November 29th, 2009 at 8:16 pm
Indianapolis:
“City of the Indians”. There aren’t many combinations worse than Indian-Greek.
November 29th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
monkey business…. you sir, are a moron