We have four late afternoon affairs to keep you from venturing outdoors today, including three divisional contests. The Jets are in New England, and they’ve already learned that OWAH TAWMFOOLAHRY IS MOAR DISRUPTIVE THAN YOUAH TAWMFOOLAHRY.
– The Jets received an unwelcome wake-up call last night when the fire alarm at the team’s hotel was set off, prompting a complete evacuation. The Jets immediately suspected foul play, but their concerns were put to rest with a completely plausible explanation. You see, some maintenance workers were doing a bit of routine middle-of-the-night stairwell sanding. Obviously this created a cloud of dust that managed to set off the smoke alarm. It’s so absurd that it has to be true.
– Cue up the sad walking away music from The Incredible Hulk in Denver, because San Diego is going to hand the Broncos their fourth consecutive loss. Chris Simms will get the start in place of Kyle Orton, so Tom Brandstater should probably start getting loose now.
– Arizona is in St. Louis, but this game is barely being televised, so it doesn’t really count.
– Cincinnati starts their three week vacation today against the Raiders in Oakland, after which they return home to host Cleveland and Detroit. It’s going to be pure hell. Cedric Benson is officially inactive this week, not that it should matter.
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