Wooo, Sunday Night Football! Oh wait, Steelers-Ravens? Can I downgrade that “Wooo” to a “Meh”?
Yes, it’s Pittsburgh versus Baltimore in the race for second place in the AFC North. The Steelers are without Ben Roethlisberger, backup QB Charlie Batch, and Head & Shoulders spokesmodel Troy Polamalu. In place of Roethlis-Batch will be rookie fifth-round draft pick and former Oregon Duck Dennis Dixon, who — as Cris Collinsworth will tell you several times tonight — has only thrown one pass in the NFL until now.
Thus, in order for the game to stay interesting tonight, we’ll need to cull all the hate these two teams inspire. I hate the Steelers. Christmas Ape hates the Ravens. Ravens fans hate Christmas Ape. Ed Reed hates not throwing laterals. 21st century industry hates both cities. And EVERYONE hates Ray Lewis. HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE!!!!!!!!!!
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ONLY BAWSTAWN TEAMS AHHHH AFFECTED BY INJURIES! NO ONE ELSE IS! ONLY THE LEGENDARY BEANTOWN THANKFUL CAN COMPLAIN ABOUT THEM! FACK YOU! THE 2008 SEASON IS FOHEVAH MAHHHHKED WITH AN ASTERISK! YAN-KEES SACK! YAN-KEES SACK! LEN BIAS!
God damn it the dirty bomb never went off!
“The Steelers, minus Big Ben, his backup, Polamalu and one of their starting linemen, forced OT in Baltimore. Even if the Ravens win, this is an embarrassment.”
I find it hard not to agree with you, but Dixon surprised me and played with a decent amount of composure considering his experience.
A win’s a win. Our schedule is cake after GB next week minus our final matchup with the stillers. I hope Ben’s healthy for our next match-up.
HARF HARF HARF OWIE
The Steelers, like the Giants, might still make the playoffs, but they’ve both had rough years and I’m not optimistic about either team’s Super Bowl hopes. Goddamn I miss the 2008 season
/pours beer for Ape, leaves light on at the bar
ugh.. brb buying a Favre jersey and acting like I’m not from Pittsburgh
What the fuck did Stabby say?
Think it’s true that Paul Kruger has ties to the Nazi Party?
KSK is dead on balls accurate on the comments about Collinsworth. I dont like the guy but damn does he call it like he sees it “how many times are you gonna take a shot before kicking the game winner” is dead on. The fuckin ravens just kept crammin in ther, just end this bitch already (as they have done while i drunkenly typed here!)
Loethrisbelgel concussion = no smirres fol Hines, no smirres for Stirrels. No smirres for Chlistmas Ape.
Wah, we have injuries, wah, we have a better team, wah. Just saving Ape some time.
Why would I steal that from Pats fans from all last season?
Meh, Dixon still looked better than Sanchez has at times.
Well Cuntliff was a Brown earlier in the year, so he has that losing taint yet.
Wah, we have injuries, wah, we have a better team, wah. Just saving Ape some time.
No mole smirre fol Hines…
So much for that.
Sorry Dixon. Thanks for playing.
Kruger! My son tells my that your company sucks!!
Don’t throw it to the guys in purple, Dennis!
Aw nutbunnies.
Dixerception!!!!!!!!!!!
Dirty bomb!!!! Where is my misguided Ackbar? (besides avoiding obvious Imperial traps)
Flacco’s trying so very hard to Cutler this game away.
Joe Flacco sucks ass. It had to be said.
Peter King doesn’t think it’s fair that Pittsburgh got the ball first in overtime. Even though Baltimore now has the ball.
Nice pass, Flacco
has anyone else noticed that since Mcnabb got made fun of for not knowing a game could end in a tie, the refs point out during the start of O.T. that after 15 minutes the game will end in a tie. just saying is all
Dixonfloat
You could say that.
Big Ben, his backup, Polamalu and one of their starting linemen are the new penalty flag.
what the hell is al michaels talking about??
Ape: Is commenting here your release valve, since you can’t yell, scream and wave the yellow towel from the press box??
/Steelers ‘deserve a result here’
C’mon tie!
The Steelers, minus Big Ben, his backup, Polamalu and one of their starting linemen, forced OT in Baltimore. Even if the Ravens win, this is an embarrassment.
They better get a good backup, with the new concussion rules they’ll implement who knows how much playing time Roethlisberger will miss in the coming seasons. He’s just a concussion freak.
so close…….
Wow
ZOINKS!
Nice hands by the wide receiver coach
and there’s the make up call
@Ape: How about that hip check?
Illegal contact, then PI? Isn’t that essentially like ticketing a driver for speeding, then giving him another ticket for egregious speeding?
Looks like the refs stopped hating Baltimore.
That punter should teach Jeff Reed how not to look like a pussy while covering kick returns
Dixon has been terrific tonight. What’s the over/under on him taking the backup job for good from Batch?
T-Good had no problem with contact from behind when he was on the 7th Floor.
At least Sepulveda isn’t a pussy.
Jesus H. Rice!
At least Cuntliff got the 4 points I needed, now the Ravens need to lose this fucking game.
Jeff Reed is anxious because this game is cutting into date-raping time.
How does the DENNIS system work for quickies?
The Ravens went for it…Greggggg’s notebook is confused…
Ray Rice might be good.
Go for it, do you think you’ll get the ball back?
Great use of timeouts, Harbaugh.
Block In The Back. I knew I should of brainstormed for a better KSK commenting name.
Usually, I’m not one to complain about the music selection, but was that REALLY fucking Jackson Browne at the commercial bump?
Looks like Hochuli’s Gun Show is closed this evening.
THE BEN HAS CALLED PLAYS IN GOOD TO THE DENNIS DESPITE INJURY TO THE BRAINSPOT
For what it’s worth, since I’ve heard confusion about the field logo a few times recently:
http://www.50states.com/flag/mdflag.htm
Hey Dennis, I hear the other Maryland football team is looking for a new QB…
promise?
AND… Separate Entirely.
DENNIS DIXON WILL RAPE YOU IN THE STREET!
Ape: As long as we can get Marmalard as Pey-Pey’s opponent in that first playoff game, that result would seem to be destined to happen. If so, I look forward to a second consecutive “Most Valuable FAIL” LOLNFL picture for my work desktop’s background…
Ravens being the dirty birds that they are cough up a hairball in the shape of a football. Steelers being from the outdated once industrial city won’t progress it.
The Ravens’ ancestral crest at the 50 just screams class!
Superbowl… Dreamboat vs. Purple Jesus
Mendenhall! Mendenhall! Mendenhall!
Nah, I think the Colts make it a little further and have their shit ruined by Laserface and Tiny Darren.
WTF? No penalty on the Ravens player for shoving after the whistle? I’m sure even Ravens fans thought that was unnecessary.
Oh, right, Ravens fans aren’t reasonable.
Ray-Ray-quality shot in the back to a prone Flacco from Silverback there. He IS a burgeoning defensive leader!
fuch mei
But hey, we’re in the playoffs, which is more than I can say for one, maybe both, of these teams.
We’re all excited for the Colts to lose their first playoff game again.
Meh, I’m all discussed out.
But hey, we’re in the playoffs, which is more than I can say for one, maybe both, of these teams.
So how much longer before Baltimore fans start bringing their own penalty flags to the games, and covering the field with their referee-hating, ball-bearing-weighted outrage 4-5 times a game?
Because the best irony would be seeing Ravens fans throwing penalty flags onto the field, as an homage to Bart Scott throwing the penalty flag into the stands against NE in 2007…
And when did Matt Suhey start playing baseball for the Yankees? Who moved my shoes? Who put this dirty supper plate in front of me? WHO STOLE MY SUPPER?
James Harrison is either incredibly smart or incredibly stupid.
Schwedes
I get confused with all the guys named Mark Duper in the league.
@save
You mean its not the same guy?
Reed actually playing > Polamalu watching game from sidelines
Does anyone else do a quick Marino flashback when they hear Mark Clayton’s name? And the Steve Smith thing is worse.
Sometimes I wish the NFL would adopt the Screen Actors’ Guild naming rules, where middle initials/name variants are used to keep confusion/fraud to a minimum. Also, I sometimes wish my brain worked better.
@ ROHTC: Well, the Civil War trophy (that isn’t being used anymore, wtf?) *IS* a platypus.
/has been wishing for years that they would bring it back
One fucking touchdown, Smirre. You cunt.
/fantasy frustration
I don’t motherfucking care about Jay Leno’s show.
Polamalu > Reed
I motherfucking hate this game.
No one motherfucking cares.
Ed Reed still sucks at tackling. I think Hines just carried him 10 yards.
SMIRRE AT HINES WALD’S BIATCH ED REED
I motherfucking hate this game.
With Woodley heating up, the Ravens may need to resort to the rare double-unbalanced offensive line.
Play Sam Cooke to seduce women. DO NOT play Sam Koch to seduce women.
“Twirling” isn’t entirely inapt. But I tend to think of Mendenhall’s spin move as the “Graveled Washing Machine.”
and german for ‘men in the hall’
Mendenhall is French for ‘spin, twirl and twist’
Twirl happens