Better Help Out Your Brah, Brah
11.10.09
Brah, I don’t even know how to react to that! First, I’m all, like, WHEW! There’s Coldplay on the Pod. I praise Brahman for Coldplay. But then you go drop bombs on my moms with the no DMB disclosure. That’s like play-action mindf*ck, brah.
Brah! Is your black brah trying to hang on to the lingering strains of his blackness? Nah brah, you gotta indoctrinate that black brah to chill tunes. Otherwise he could get crazy subversive rap ideas and turn into a gangbanging brah. That’s no way for a black brah to be. It’s dope that you got him on the Coldplay, though. Just add Rilo Kiley and he and Peter King can be tight coffeehouse brahs.
But you really gotta get him on the DMB, brah. It’s, like, not getting your daily dose of chill without it. RDA of DMB, brah. You gotsta have it.
You’re just dropping all the knowledge on the Tweeple today, Brahmaster Fuller.
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love coldplay and dave matthews
Ugh, I HATE how white I sound here, but the new DMB is actually really, really good.
/ahem
brah…
DMB has been going on since I was in college back in ’93. It hasn’t let up. The worst part are all the fucking ‘brahs’ that play DMB nonstop at open mics. They really think they’re fucking great. All I want to do is strangle them. I’ve been drunk enough to harass these assholes to the point of crying/fighting.
I can’t help it. It drives me nuts.
On a sidenote, I will also say that the Holly Mangold tag might be the greatest tag ever.
I”m somewhat confused over the Rilo Kiley reference; that’s more of a hipster/indie stereotype.
DMB is the Gen X equivalent of the Emperor’s New Clothes………..think about it
The Fray will be PISSED if they aren’t part of that rad playlist.
Oh, and I know Jedman already posted it, but I MUST second the “Brahmaster Fuller” awesomeness.
Thursday Jaguar punching competition
Not to be confused with the Thursday Cougar punching and spitting competition sponsored by Larry Johnson.
/HEY-OHHHHHHHH
Whoa, brah. You gotta get some G Love on that, brah.
Don’t anybody go and put the D in the B.
If Rex found out Rhodes had coldplay on his ipod, he would definitely be suspended for the Jets Thursday Jaguar punching competition.
Toss on some OAR and the girls will be so wet you’ll need hip waders to walk through the room, brah.
A white guy critiquing the music a black guy has on his iPod? That shit ain’t right.
Why do I care when someone likes shitty bands? Because the more people who like them the more likely it is that I will have to hear them at some point when I go out. And depending on the demo at the establishment, you’re always stuck hearing some shitty band, be it Dave Matthews, The Eagles, Nickelback, Rascal Flatts (really, if you’re in a bar frequented by rednecks, you’re just fucked all around), etc.
dude. man. dude.
@ryno
because it gets old pussy tubing your mom to DMB every night.
Coldplay, Kerry? You’re not black enough for my sister, brah.
“Brahmaster Fuller”
Damn, brah, that be a Buckminster Fuller reference??? Y’all be droppin some SURRIUS science on my ass!!!!
@goesto11: Dave Matthews Band is still nearly inescapable in Colleges.
The real question is, what’s the over/under on there being more Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus songs being on that ipod than Coldplay and DMB?
Best thing about this post by an enormous margin? The “holly mangold has the microwave chime on her iPod” tag. Well, played, Ape.
and rocco, no.
@ryno
just chill, brah.
The real question here is who put that Coldplay on Kerry Rhodes’ iPod.
I’ll be going over to Kerry’s house later to repossess his black card. He’s got a lot of work to do to get it back.
/Yes we all have one
You know how I know you’re gay? You listen to Coldplay.
I despise both those fucking bands.
It’s offensive to me that anybody likes DMB, and I’m not going to lift a finger to help Ryno understand this.
God, I hate the Dave Matthews Band. If, like me, you were a white kid at college in the late ’90s, that shit was inescapable.
Bust out a fucking fiddle around me, brah, and you’d BETTER be about to play “The Devil Went Down to Georgia.” There’s no other excuse.
Fair enough Ape – that’s the first clear explanation I’ve gotten on the matter. I appreciate it.
Would you be surprised that I love DMB?
“holly mangold has the microwave chime on her iPod” might be the funniest tag ever here at KSK
Please help me understand this – why does it offend you so when people like a trendy band like Coldplay or DMB or whoever?
Sigh.
Because swearing by Coldplay and Dave Matthews, espeically together, is a well-known bro cliche. It’s not offensive to me whether people like one or both. Just playing into that generalization.
@Ryno
I heard Nickelback is your favorite band and you don’t even have a second favorite band.
DMB = Damn, Mysister’s Big?
Brah, next think he won’t have his John Mayer to chill the fuck out to brah!
@ Ryno – It’s not chill, brah.
I’ll never understand why people give a shit when others like a certain band? How/why does it bother you?
Please help me understand this – why does it offend you so when people like a trendy band like Coldplay or DMB or whoever?
I saw this entire episode unfold on my twitter page yesterday. It was the most interesting thing there. I have no idea why I have a twitter.
I thought the real question is what does Rex Ryan have on his iPod?
Jay Cutler has DMB on his iPod, brah.
the real question is: Does he have Rilo Kiley on his iPod?!?! I guess I’ll just text him.
Satellite’s my song, brah!