She’s gone from suck to blow. Graphic designer Ken Carbone picked out the NFL’s three worst helmets (Pats, Bucs, Redskins) and crafted some truly inspired insipid redesigns. His vision for the Redskins is meant to resemble a Native American’s headdress, but really it looks like the current helmet died and sprouted wings. Now if the Redskins were to abandon their current look–which wouldn’t be the worst idea–I would hope that they’d draw inspiration from some of the better designs of their past, rather than their worst. [Fast Company via Kottke]
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November 12th, 2009 at 9:58 am
That Pats helmet redesign is horrible. Going back to the Red/White uniforms with Pat Patriot will do just fine, thanks.
Buccaneers should revisit the creamsicle jerseys too.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:07 am
yeah, well nothing can be as bad as these:
http://tinyurl.com/yjpt92v
November 12th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Pats helmet looks like something from American Gladiators. Or Evel Knievel.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:12 am
Carbone also redesigned the Redskins pants to include a printed bottle of Thunderbird on each side.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:16 am
Ken Carbone recommends more ass patting in football, as well.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:19 am
“A team as legendary as the New England Patriots deserves a more celebratory helmet. Here I totally disregarded the existing design and offered a strong, boldly colored alternative that would look triumphant in the end zone. ”
40 years of mediocrity and not being relevent until this decade is legendary now?
November 12th, 2009 at 10:24 am
That Redskins helmet looks like the result of particularly enthusiastic cunnilingus performed on an ostrich.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:26 am
The 1965 Redskins design was great. Far better than the picture of Deals With His Wrist.
It would be hard to sell the old Pats and Bucs designs to ownership as the current unis came about just as each teams’ fortunes turned for the better. But I do agree. We need some more flash out there, and it’s not just more San Diego powder blue we want. The Pats could do a modified Pat Patriot with actual white on the helmet rather than Boston flesh tone. The Bucs may like the crimson and pewter but there’s enough red out there. We need an orange team, dammit.
/bring out the Detroit Wheels and Memphis Southmen throwbacks
November 12th, 2009 at 10:28 am
The guy thinks the Bengals have the best helmets in the NFL. That right there should eliminate any credibility.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:38 am
@ Pop Rocks: I think he means “fierce” in the Tyra Banks sense of the word.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:42 am
The Pats helmet looks like what a gay Captain America might wear. Just flaming ridiculous.
Please don’t fuck with the Stars and Stripes like that. Ever again.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:44 am
I believe the reference you’re all looking for with that Pats helmet is Super Dave Osborne.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:47 am
I thought the Bucs helmet looked like a slight improvement over what they’ve got. Everything else, though, was a giant pile of crap. Especially the Pats helmet. UGH.
Mind you, the current Pats logo is awful. It’s the worst aspects of mid-90s designs. I expect them to be talking about how they can leverage e-Business to incentivize my core competencies on the World Wide Web. With the latest in DHTML, they can promise a dynamic site that works in IE4 AND Netscape.
I’m probably the only person on Earth that thinks the guy taking a dump is a better helmet logo than what they currently have.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:04 am
@ Widespread: In Rod Rust we Trust!
/for a 1-15 record
November 12th, 2009 at 11:04 am
@ t3k: I completely agree with you, as do many Pats fans. Pat Patriot >>> Flying Elvis.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:10 am
The Vikes need to go back to their traditional unis NOW. I hate their current XFL look.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:21 am
Why is this guy taking it upon himself to redesign helmets? Doesn’t he know the owners spend millions of dollars to have chimpanzees design their new uniform look to be a fierce (i.e., gay) as possible?
Classic helmets >>> Redesigned arena league/XFL helmets
/Redskins will suck no matter what they do.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:39 am
Looks like Carbone got inspired by watching a University of Oregon game while tripping on bad shrooms.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:43 am
Pats helmet would be more appropriate with a VHS tape on the sides.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:45 am
I don’t think the Redskins one they provided is horrible, but definitely not inspired. And I chime in with everyone else that the Patriots helmet suggestion is putrid.
@ t3k: I’d say probably 90% of the Patriots fans I know like the classic Patriots design better than flying Elvis. Hell, even the tri-cornered hat design is better: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3524/3276046332_097f612e3f.jpg?v=0
If they want someone to re-design the helmets, they should just go through these guys:
http://www.thefantasyhelmetproject.com/
November 12th, 2009 at 11:54 am
Don’t forget to read the comments. Amy Rhodelander thinks the Buzzsaw logo isn’t “fierce” enough, and suggests they use this:
http://polegnyn.deviantart.com/art/Cardinal-Logo-138844121
…which she says is much more “menacing”.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:57 am
The Redskins should adopt the redesign and change their name to the Washington Pigeon Boys.
November 12th, 2009 at 11:58 am
@Grimace
I like the color of the Pats new unis but hate the Flying Elvis logo. Could they just throw Pat the Patriot on the current helmet? Maybe that would look worse.
November 12th, 2009 at 12:29 pm
I’d prefer the Bucs just go back to the gay pirate logo. I’m pissed I missed that game last weekend with the old creamsicle unis. They should either go back to those, or play one nationally televised game in them. They are so bad, they’re great!
I am also a fan of the Pat the Patriot uniforms. I like the red jerseys versus the blue ones. Classic stripes, as well, on the jerseys.
November 12th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
I don’t even think the current Pats helmet is that bad, and this redesign is by far the worst of the three. The Bucs one is pretty bad too. The ’skins one is probably the best of the three, but that’s not saying much.
Also, Kevin in ABQ, you’re like, 2 years late on that one broseph.
November 12th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
“I tried a design direction that might be considered more politically correct”
Wow. No wonder all of his ideas were just awful.
November 12th, 2009 at 1:32 pm
The Redskins should adopt the redesign and change their name to the Washington Pigeon Boys.
For the last time, they’re Birds of War!
November 12th, 2009 at 2:00 pm
I love how teams claim redesigns are because “they’re trying to break ties with all the losing teams of the past.” Know a sure fire way to do that? WINNING.
That said, I agree something needs to be done about the Redskins helmet. It’s 2009 people. Having an insulting horribly stereotyped caricature on your helmet is an embarrassment to the league and the city of Washington. If they were the Washington Samurais, I doubt people would tolerate a little yellow man with squinty eyes and buck teeth on their logo.
(Same goes for the Cleveland Indians. Although given the city of Cleveland is about 30 years behind the times, I don’t expect much from them).
The Spear helmet looked cool. Or they should just change the name altogether to something more PC like the Washington All-Stars or the Washington Federals.
November 12th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
@ BBM
You mean something like the Washington Nationals?
November 12th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
@Otto
Does that make Snyder the Trashman?
November 12th, 2009 at 2:43 pm
Am I the only one that loves the Flying Elvis look with their white away jerseys? Granted, I grew up watching them in the mid-90s so that is really the only logo I know.
But that new design is terrible and I need to bleach my eyes.
November 12th, 2009 at 2:45 pm
They’re already named the Redskins, how much more racist can it get? Well…I think they should just go for the full-court racist press. Change their logo to some Englishmen raping and plundering an Indian village. They’re mascot an Indian with a sars blanket and dots upon his face. The outrage could draw some attention away from their spectacular football, but it’s worth the risk.
November 12th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Coming from a Dolphin fan, there is no worse logo than Miami’s. But our mascot’s a fucking dolphin, so what are you gonna do?
November 12th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
This is screaming for a Tim Gunn meets Tawmy from Quinze piece.
Gunn: Designers, gather around. The NFL has asked us to design new logos for their teams. They sent us one of their greatest fans to help us out. Meet Tommy from Quinze.
Tommy: How da fack ya cacksmacka’s doin? Youse wants ta design a fackin’ logo for da greatest team in da universe? Get da fack out of here! You couldn’t design your lips around my cack.
November 12th, 2009 at 3:27 pm
@Bugeater…When did Tommy move to Brooklyn? The fucksa Tim Gunn?
November 12th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
Yeah bugeater, that wasn’t even close to a Tommy accent. Very weak.
Oh and Pigs: yes, you are the only one. I grew up with the Patriots of the 90’s as well, and I don’t think that’s a good excuse. Also, those 90’s jerseys with the pinstripes were god awful.
November 12th, 2009 at 5:48 pm
I agree about the Pats redesign, but if you’re really steamed about how terrible the flag helmet looks, get pissed at Betsy Ross and all ‘em. The stars-and-stripes flag– from a purely aesthetic view– is kind of shitty.
I don’t see what you’re seeing with the Redskin design. Redman in side-of-coin profile on the side of the helmet is– and kinda has been– an eyesore for a while. The arrows are a nice design, but the headdress actually isn’t that bad either. You think something that’s actually semi-accurate for a Native-American-named team looks “faggy” or “ostrich cunnilingus,” then change the f*cking team name.
The Buc design is a big improvement– the cutlass and flag shit IS a mess on TV.
November 12th, 2009 at 6:15 pm
@SavetoFavorites
I must have missed the part where the American flag has powder blue and pinstripes on it. That helmet evokes very little USA and a whole lot of “gay Captain America”.
November 12th, 2009 at 10:13 pm
a gay captain america hahaha
November 13th, 2009 at 1:00 am
Dude, that feather helmet is far from the “worst”. Slick 60’s-era deco. They should throw those the fuck back for their next big game.