fappoforflacco

The Ratbirds and the Greatriots mark the lone interesting match-up of the early slate on this, the pinko Sunday. The Ravens lead the AFC in scoring (playing Kansas City and Cleveland at home in two of your games will help with that) yet have scored a total of six points in their two previous trips to Foxboro. Meanwhile, Welkaaahhh is returning! So long Jewkah! Dr. Underneath has to make his rounds.

/has 2012-esque fantasy of ground opening up and swallowing the stadium during this game

Sweet jizzing robot Jesus, the rest of these early games suck.

  • When the Bucs and Redskins play, sticking pink in the endzone is the last place capable of raising awareness.

    pinkpost

    Also, that’s Breast CANCER Awareness Sunday, Berman.

    Freudian slips are a tragic upshot of deux-deux-deux abuse.

  • Battle for Ohio! Winner gets the loser’s squalor!
  • Edgerrin James returns to Indy! Nate Burleson is a fantasy stud. What enticing storylines to get me to tuzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
  • Injuries have forced me to choose between starting Chad Henne and Matt Cassel on one of my fantasy teams. The difference between the three and negative two points I get could be a critical one. C’mon Giants, let’s give up a first down before midway through the 3rd quarter.
  • Gay Zorro ripped the Raiders this week, telling the world what it already knew about the organization’s numerous dysfunctions. Meanwhile, the Raiders travel to Houston and if Nnamdi could somehow allow Matt Schaub’s torrid pace to continue apace, it’d be greatly appreciated.
  • Greg Olsen’s mom was once diagnosed with breast cancer, but Jay Cutler’s never been let into a threesome with her and the tight end, so he’s all, “Yeah, that’s bad, I guess. She gonna be all right. I mean, I dunno. I’ve been through worse. Whatever.”

    emocutler

    UPDATE: Oops. Forgot to fob off a line about the forgettable Jags-Titans contest. IT’S ONLY BECAUSE JACK DEL RIO WOULDN’T LET ME!