Halloween falls on a Saturday this year, which is tremendous when coupled with the coinciding occurrence of Daylight Savings Time. That’s an extra hour to sleep off all the drinking de los muertes before preparing for a day of sports-related drinking. And we’re counting on Halloween to be good, knowing full well that Fox is preparing to unleash the goddamn Favre Cam on us the following day. Continuing what has become a yearly tradition for us, we’ve compiled a list of costumes for NFL figures. Do enjoy.
Wes Welker — Sandpaper
Julian Edelman — Slightly shittier version of whatever Welker’s costume is
Jim Mora Sr. — Robert Novak
Aaron Rodgers — Vampire goth
Jay Cutler — Goth vampire
Josh McDaniels — Nazi Belichick (will attend with Prince Harry)
Rex Ryan – A play sheet that simply reads “BLITZ” in huge letters.
Owen Schmitt — Stone Cold Steve Austin from Wrestlemania 13 (for 12th year in a row)
Ben Roethlisberger – Good Humor man (“SORRY I ATED ALL THE CHOCO TACOS.”)
Dan Snyder — Waring Hudsucker (the dead version)
Darren Sproles — Tinkerbell
James Harrison — James Harrison
Braylon Edwards — NOT LEBRON JAMES!
Brady Quinn — Harvey Milk
Redskins fans — Ravens fans
Eli Manning — “A cowboy! No, a fireman! No, an astronaut! No, a dinosaur!” “A firefighting space cowboy that also happens to be a dinosaur!”
JaMarcus Russell – Funny hat (actual costumes require too much effort)
Miles Austin — Baraka
Pierre Garcon — Waiter
Brett Favre — a kid
Peyton Manning — Billy Mays
Ed Reed — Hamburger Helper Glove
Peter King — Clint Eastwood (only to find out the Clint Eastwood costume is only available in New York and LA)
Peter King’s backup plan — A chemist
Marty B – Jason Whitlock
Jason Whitlock — An oozing pumpkin
Jeff Garcia — Certainly not Zorro!
Matt Schaub — Street clothes (so normal!)
Joey Porter — Huckleberry Hound
Limas Sweed — Basketball hoop
Chris Cooley — Jeff Reed
Jeff Reed — Naked
Philip Rivers — Balloon boy
William Gay — Doormat
Justin Fargas — Ghost pigeon
Tom Brady — Don Draper
LenDale White — Jose Cuervo
Calvin Johnson — Slutty Megatron
Darrius Heyward-Bey – Invisible man
Michael Crabtree — Darrius Heyward-Bey
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great post great replys
We checked lots of blogs to findsomething regarding to this area…. I salute you
Santonio Holmes – Naked.
LT – The Ghost of Adrian Peterson Future
Randy Moss and Wes Welker – Kanye West and Taylor Swift
Drew Brees – The Island from Lost (face only.)
Bill Parcells – Vladimir Putin
Jimmy Johson – Elvis
Jared Allen – Toby Keith
Brandon Jacobs – Luke Cage
Drew Brees – Lemmy Kilmister
@Cobra Commander – Does Snyder being Susan make UM V? (+5000 for the V for Vendetta reference)
Come on, Garcia would be a perfect Tobias Funke.
BigRedEd said:
Brady Quinn – Brady Quinn’s sister
A.J. Hawk – The Invisible Man
Eric Mangini – The Shit Monster from Dogma
No one’s going as concrete cyanide?
Garcon means boy.
Wait, Eli wants to be a space cowboy? There are no cows in space. And didn’t he wear that five years ago?
/Castle’d
Wait, Eli wants to be a space cowboy? There are no cows in space. And didn’t he wear that five years ago?
/Castle’d
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Q3pdj9p6yI&feature=related
I was hoping someone would work in a pedo bear costume, but I suppose Mark Sanchez as the frito bandito has made my night as well.
/actually lol’ed at that one
The Peanut Gallery has officially redeemed itself. No more scolding from the teachers for at least a week.
Brady Quinn – Brady Quinn’s Sister
(actually, have they ever been seen in the same place at the same time?)
@ AntBaby: -1 for the AP Stylebook reference.
@NestMinder +1
Dan Snyder – Jeff Dunham; Cerrato will be the dummy.
I was about to say “JaMarcus Russell is really going to go through the trouble of finding a hat, and putting it on? Really?”, then I realised he could probably just get a teammate to do it for him. Then wheel him up the porch steps (“You realise them shits can have 4, 5 steps? Fuck all that.”)
Not gonna lie, that Slutty Megatron line has be thinking about Slutty Peyton Manning.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go light my brain on fire.
Leonard Little – The Gimp.
Leonard Little – The Gimp. Mark Chmura – Cpt Chaos. Samkon Gado – H.I.V. Levi Brown – Lisa Lamponeli. Chris Henry – King Tut King Laserface – Jack the Ripper
Miles Austin as Baraka – fucking genius. Props to Mortal Kombat II!
Limas Sweed FTW.
Daylight SavING. ING. Singular.
Slutty Megatron, don’t go near that guy in the Optimus Prime costume– it’s Merriman!
Adrian Peterson – A Berserker
Me – Xmas Ape
Tom Brady – Chester from Gunsmoke
/really old TV reference
Actually, Rex Ryan’s sheet would read “ZTILB”
Jessica Simpson – Fat Jessica Simpson
@gino and petarded – those are great ones (particularly the mind flayer). You guys wanna join the Super Friends Club? Gino your nickname can be “database.” Petarded King can be “cosmos.”
Virginia McClaskey = Terry Schaivo
Do you think that Iron Maiden has to pay Al Davis for the use of his likeness or have they tweaked the image enough to escape that?
Shawne Merriman – the Boston Strangler
Donte Stallworth – deathmobile from Animal house http://www.thestudiotour.com/ush/studiotour/transportationdept/animalhouse.jpg
Jon Gruden: Ralphie from “A Christmas Story”
@ El Nene – if Tom Cable starts dancing naked in a translucent sheet, I am gonna throw up in a cat.
Mark Sanchez – Emiliano Zapata (http://www.old-picture.com/american-history-1900-1930s/pictures/Emelio-Zapata.jpg)
Peter King – Peter Griffin
Al Davis -The Crypt-Keeper
Dan Snyder – Adam Susan (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adam_Susan)
Rex Ryan – Conan the Barbarian
Dan Snyder’s Dad – Marvin Gaye’s Dad.
HINT.
JT O’Sullivan – JT O’Sullivan from KSK
@Andy – Al Davis does not need a costume he already looks like one of the Ephors from 300.
cant believe you let Al Davis off the hook here… So many choices for him.
Troy Polamalu – Head and Shoulders bottle holding a coke Zero
Plaxico Burress – Prisoner.
Chad Ochocinco — Super Carboat Man. He can fly through the air like floating bacon.
Limas Sweed – Piranha.
Kerry Collins – pants-less Kerry Collins
Dan Snyder – Dark Helmet
Vinny Cerrato – Colonel Sanders
Jim Zorn – Major Asshole
Chris Cooley – Barf
Drew Brees – Breesus Christ
Matt Ryan – Ron Mexico
Ted Ginn – Clifford Franklin
Chad Henne – Willie Beamon
Matt Leinart -Mark Sanchez
Eric Mangini – Rex Ryan
Todd Haley-Larry Johnson’s dad
Larry Johnson-gay baker
@Zack: Bill Belichek – Mindflayer
Roger Goodell – Beholder
Reche Caldwell- Fruit Bat
Texans’ offensive line-’96 Broncos’ offensive line…please?
Jeff Reed stole my costume idea.
Jay Cutler – Kyle Orton
Larry Johnson – Elton John
Steve Smith (Carolina) – Steve Smith (NYG)
Peyton Manning – Jeff Fisher
Chad Ochocinco – Chad Johnson
Marshawn Lynch – Applebee’s employee
Ted Ginn Jr. – a T Rex
Fast Willie Parker – Slow Willie Parker
Hines Ward – Birry Goat (third year in a row)
Andre Johnson – actor
Jake Delhomme – Fred Lane (I wish)
Terence Cody – Drew Magary
er, excuse me. Butter Bean.
@ Zack
I’ll just consult my Monster Manual…
Albert Haynesworth – Umber Hulk
Darren Sproles – Brownie
/kicks own ass
Tom Cable – Butterball
Adam Jones: Green Man
O WE GON SMOKE DAT GREEN CHUH CHUH
i know you don’t want fellatio for how funny your posts are but this…
Miles Austin — Baraka
…was absolutely awesome.
eric mangini – a brown version of grimace
TGAMC, lame. “a list of costumes for NFL figures.”
The frito bandito rules
D Bowe- Snoop Dogg
Of course, these suggestions will be meaningless to anyone unfamiliar with Dungeons and Dragons, but…
Ed Reed – Lurker Above
Andre Smith – Gelatinous Cube
Jared Allen – Owlbear
Jeremy Shockey – Shambling Mound
Chad Ochocinco – Will-O-Wisp
Al Davis – Lich
Brandon Flowers – The lead singer of the Killers (in whiteface)
Corey Lidle=Kareem Abdul Jabbar in Airplane
Seneca Wallace: Judge Smails
Miles Austin: Vanilla Ice
TO: Mickey Rourke
Terrell Owens- Dennis Rodman
Jared Allen- Hillbilly Maniac (not an actual costume, but people think it is)
Peter King- Deanna Favre
Also, you know that somewhere this Halloween, somebody’s gonna do a Zombie Steve McNair costume- almost certainly a retarded white guy in blackface.
Visante Shaincoe – Mr. Ed
MMMMMM slutty megatron
Larry Fitzgerald – block of cheddar cheese
Mark Sanchez – The Frito Bandito (Rex Ryan’s decision)
Chris Collinsworth – Wooderson
Peter King: Favre mask, dick-in-a-box style.
Al Davis: Mumm-Ra
Michael Vick: Cesar Milan
Emmitt Smith: Masturbating Bear
Tom Brady: Commoner
Andrea McNulty – female soldier/tv repairman – who’s pregnant
Dick Jauron – Zombie Dick Jauron (no costume necessary)
Jim Zorn – death row inmate aka dead man walking
Crabtree’s agent “Eugene” – Drew Rosenhaus