Halloween falls on a Saturday this year, which is tremendous when coupled with the coinciding occurrence of Daylight Savings Time. That’s an extra hour to sleep off all the drinking de los muertes before preparing for a day of sports-related drinking. And we’re counting on Halloween to be good, knowing full well that Fox is preparing to unleash the goddamn Favre Cam on us the following day. Continuing what has become a yearly tradition for us, we’ve compiled a list of costumes for NFL figures. Do enjoy.
Wes Welker — Sandpaper
Julian Edelman — Slightly shittier version of whatever Welker’s costume is
Jim Mora Sr. — Robert Novak
Aaron Rodgers — Vampire goth
Jay Cutler — Goth vampire
Josh McDaniels — Nazi Belichick (will attend with Prince Harry)
Rex Ryan – A play sheet that simply reads “BLITZ” in huge letters.
Owen Schmitt — Stone Cold Steve Austin from Wrestlemania 13 (for 12th year in a row)
Ben Roethlisberger – Good Humor man (“SORRY I ATED ALL THE CHOCO TACOS.”)
Dan Snyder — Waring Hudsucker (the dead version)
Darren Sproles — Tinkerbell
James Harrison — James Harrison
Braylon Edwards — NOT LEBRON JAMES!
Brady Quinn — Harvey Milk
Redskins fans — Ravens fans
Eli Manning — “A cowboy! No, a fireman! No, an astronaut! No, a dinosaur!” “A firefighting space cowboy that also happens to be a dinosaur!”
JaMarcus Russell – Funny hat (actual costumes require too much effort)
Miles Austin — Baraka
Pierre Garcon — Waiter
Brett Favre — a kid
Peyton Manning — Billy Mays
Ed Reed — Hamburger Helper Glove
Peter King — Clint Eastwood (only to find out the Clint Eastwood costume is only available in New York and LA)
Peter King’s backup plan — A chemist
Marty B – Jason Whitlock
Jason Whitlock — An oozing pumpkin
Jeff Garcia — Certainly not Zorro!
Matt Schaub — Street clothes (so normal!)
Joey Porter — Huckleberry Hound
Limas Sweed — Basketball hoop
Chris Cooley — Jeff Reed
Jeff Reed — Naked
Philip Rivers — Balloon boy
William Gay — Doormat
Justin Fargas — Ghost pigeon
Tom Brady — Don Draper
LenDale White — Jose Cuervo
Calvin Johnson — Slutty Megatron
Darrius Heyward-Bey – Invisible man
Michael Crabtree — Darrius Heyward-Bey
I want more like this!
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