Michael Lewis’ “The Blind Side” was a captivating book tracing the rise of the left tackle position’s outsize importance in the modern NFL game and how that evolution had far-reaching enough influence that it could lift up a kid, who happens to be Ravens’ rookie Michael Oher, who would otherwise fall prey to poverty simply because he possesses a rare combination of physical gifts. It carefully and thoughtfully touched on sensitive themes of race and class largely without resorting to cheap ham-fisted sentiment. It also made Nick Saban look like a dick, which is nice.

So Hollywood gets their mitts on it and, of course, it becomes a standard issue mawkish Sandra Bullock vehicle that has The Fray playing during its trailer. Remember that two years when David Gray’s “Babylon” was on the trailer for every bad movie? Well, now it’s The Fray’s time. There’s so much you can harp on about this thing, how it suggests the movie focuses way too much on the white family (who are so magnanimous and have no possible personal motives!), that nothing football related shows up until about the 2:00 mark, that it distills a complex narrative to cliche almost instantly. It is the worst.

In short: this movie will suck out loud.