NFL Continues to Exert Dominance Without Even Trying
Hey, you know that Red Sox-Yankees rivalry, THE ONE THAT’S THE MOST FACKIN IMPAHTANT AND HISTOAHICAL IN AWL OF SPAHHHTS? PK’s bucket list wouldn’t be complete without it. Yeah, well, none of the four games from its series last week came within sniffing distance of the ratings pulled in by the Hall of Fame Game Sunday between the Titans and Bills. Yes, the first preseason game between two NFL teams of low-to-middling popularity wiped its ass with MLB’s crown jewel of overhyped steroidery.
That’s right, baseball, the part of the year where you hold the sports world hostage with your crushing dullness is thankfully coming to an end. By the time your neverending season finally starts getting interesting, the glorious glorious (it’s glorious) NFL season will already be in full swing. And none will be bothered to watch A-Rod fail again amusingly in the postseason.
But, still, c’mon, IT’S BASEBALL! It has majesty! It is pregnant with metaphor! And once it gives birth to metaphor, will nurse it with steroid bitch tits. James Earl Jones makes it sound cool! You can’t overstate its cultural import! It freed the slaves and beat the krauts overseas, then kissed your mom in Times Square on V-E Day. It’s America distilled into a situational pitching change.
Like, remember baseball cards? WE GOTTA SAVE ‘EM! Kids put them in their bike spokes, ferchrissakes! Then the little doe-eyed tykes collected them. Yes, they collected the shit out of them, in order to make themselves future thousandaires! Capitalizing on this, the card companies produced way too many of the damn things, which drove their allure down to money-grubbing collectors. Then they produced not quite as many but printed the cards on glossier paper and jacked up the price. Then they created all these “inserts” which were special, more valuable irregular cards that card companies used to justify charging $5 for a pack of 10 cards. BECAUSE THERE WAS A 1 IN 18 CHANCE YOU WOULD GET AN ANDRES GALARRAGA DIAMOND KING, WITH A SERIAL NUMBER INDICATING ITS PLACE AMONG THE ONLY 10,000 PRODUCED! HOW YOU WOULD BEAM TO ALL THE PRETTY GIRLS ON THE STREET WHEN YOU GOT YOUR MITTS ON THAT! HOW THEY LAVISH THEIR PHONE NUMBERS AND PANTIES ON YOUR FACE!
To wit: baseball blows and I’m glad we don’t even have to pretend to acknowledge it soon.
Tags: base-ball?, go cheer for your baseball team you homo, xmas ape
August 12th, 2009 at 11:56 am
Plus, baseball gave us Joe Buck. It can go fuck itself with a rake just for that.
August 12th, 2009 at 11:58 am
+1 Cal Ripken Jr. rookie card.
There’s more where that came from.
August 12th, 2009 at 11:59 am
Agreed.
+ many, Ape
August 12th, 2009 at 12:02 pm
While I am heartbroken my Sox lost. I resent the Bills-Titans HOF Game comment:
“Low to Middling-Popularity”
No body circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills….nobody.
/misses Jim Kelly
August 12th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
Fucking A.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
Bravo, Ape.
*hides his Andres Galarraga Diamond King and lists of hotties’ phone numbers*
August 12th, 2009 at 12:06 pm
High fucking five, my friend.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:07 pm
The Pirates must have been mathematically eliminated last night.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
The Pirates must have been mathematically eliminated last night.
I’m pretty sure that happened in April.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:11 pm
Who’s the asshole to the left of George Will?
August 12th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Yes, ratings should solely determine the greatness of said product.
American Idol is the best show on television right now.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:14 pm
@ Ryno, Ken Burns of baseball documentary fame.
/loves baseball
//forgives Ape for this post and will still buy his book
August 12th, 2009 at 12:18 pm
Victory in Africa?
August 12th, 2009 at 12:20 pm
Ah… I love the baseball hate. Freaking LA Times sports section is half filled with stupid baseball stories, even now during NFL training camps. Does anybody actually read 4 full pages of MLB stories?
In other news, Mary Beth King seems to have her own Mailbag now to compete with her father:
http://blog.seahawks.com/2009/08/11/qa-with-mbk/
She actually talks about sports and not coffee flavored water. This is just a ploy to takeover the family business though when PK stops respecting the sun and dies.
Oh, she saw Coldplay. http://twitter.com/seahawksmbk
Lofty
August 12th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Suck my dick, George Will!
August 12th, 2009 at 12:22 pm
No, you’re totally right. The MLB’s “neverending” six month season seems downright barbaric compared to the NFL’s perfect five month season; if anything, we need MORE coverage of a sport whose teams play once a week. We need more draft coverage, more fantasy football hand guides, and at least two more weeks of Super Bowl press coverage. And more John Madden and Chris Collinsworth. Where would American culture be without the NFL?
baseball>football
p.s. I’m a dipshit who came to the wrong blog to spew my weak shit.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:27 pm
THE George Will?
August 12th, 2009 at 12:33 pm
Comparing broadcast ratings to cable ratings makes a whole lot of sense. By that logic, NFL games played on ESPN on Monday nights must be much shittier than those played on NBC on Sunday nights.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:33 pm
“I play for the Indians.”
“Here in Cleveland? I didn’t know they still had a team!”
“Yup, we’ve got uniforms and everything, it’s really great!”
August 12th, 2009 at 12:35 pm
1. Football
8. Baseball
9. Basketball
24. Life
August 12th, 2009 at 12:36 pm
Hey AJ, take that dick out of your mouth so we can understand just what it is you’re trying to say.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:39 pm
@anonymous assholio
Victory in America. September 3, 1783 or maybe April 9, 1865.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:42 pm
Yep, time to dust off this old chestnut:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=om_yq4L3M_I
August 12th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Who would have thought the four strapping lads pictured above favored a sport of nostalgia, quantifiable statistical analysis, and lack of contact over a sport where someone is chased by larger (often African-American!) men who have the goal of inflicting physical harm on them?
Nerds.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
Comparing broadcast ratings to cable ratings makes a whole lot of sense. By that logic, NFL games played on ESPN on Monday nights must be much shittier than those played on NBC on Sunday nights.
From the Fanhouse post:
NBC NFL Preseason (Bills-Titans), 7.9 million viewers
FOX Baseball (Red Sox-Yankees & Rangers-Angels), 4.0 million viewers
August 12th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
SpoFlaWa!
August 12th, 2009 at 12:45 pm
Sorry AJ, 3 to 4 awesome packed hours of violence > 3 or 4 mediocre hours of non-violence packed waiting for one big play to happen.
If it wasn’t for fantasy baseball, the sport would be dying faster than it already is.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Good to see we found a picture of Will with his trademark “just caught masterbating” look he pulls off so well.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Grimace said “3 or 4 mediocre hours of non-violence packed waiting for one big play to happen.” Best description of the sport I’ve ever read. Why do Americans like baseball more than soccer again?
August 12th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I realize that I’m totally wasting my time arguing baseball’s worth compared to football on a football blog…. and I really have nothing else to say on the matter.
/rolls up into a ball
//tells self that baseball is still relevant
August 12th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
From the Fanhouse post:
NBC NFL Preseason (Bills-Titans), 7.9 million viewers
FOX Baseball (Red Sox-Yankees & Rangers-Angels), 4.0 million viewers
Well, in your critic’s defense, Fox isn’t a real network.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:56 pm
According to that picture, 3 out of 4 baseball lovers are tie wearing pompous asses. 1 out of 4 is some down and out emo kid.
August 12th, 2009 at 12:59 pm
Yeah baseball sucks. Football with it’s 4 pre-season games and 16 regular season games and place kickers and punters is way better. I loved watching the Lions lose every game they played last year. I love a game where you have to take a break after every incomplete pass, turnover, kick-off, touch down, extra point, punt, field goal. I love how 60 minutes of game time takes 3 hours. I love getting to listen to the fourth team announcers from Fox who don’t know who the players are.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Well, in your critic’s defense, Fox isn’t a real network.
Plus, the majority of its regular viewership was busy on Saturday disrupting town hall meetings about health care.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
Can we all stop arguing about these red-blooded American pastimes and attack hockey like good citizens?
August 12th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
@Otto Man – To be fair, neither is NBC.
/five of hours of Leno in Primetime? Just what everybody wants!!
August 12th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
Also, some hooligan managed to edit my original post. I did not say:
p.s. I’m a dipshit who came to the wrong blog to spew my weak shit.
+1 for creativity, though. REAL FUNNY U GUYZ
August 12th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
I actually understand why people like baseball, but yeah, it’s fucking slow. The best things about going to a game are the hotdogs, beer and, if you’re a guy, watching the parade of tits (the female ones, anyway) go by, encased in thin summer fabrics. It’s a good way to kill 3 hours, if you can afford to pay for the parking, admission and food. So, it’s also a good way to put a dent in a $100 bill, in case you have extra ones sitting around taking up space in your wallet.
I don’t understand how anyone can watch baseball on TV. I’d rather watch dental surgery.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:07 pm
I like that Leitch is the only person on the planet who can rock that haircut even worse than Ken Burns
August 12th, 2009 at 1:08 pm
Aren’t we forgetting perhaps the greatest difference between the two, at least from the fan’s perspective? It is possible, albeit not recommended, to watch a football game 100% sober and be entertained. Try that with a baseball game. I dare you. “I never realized how boring this game is.” – Homer Simpson
Also: “I loved watching the Lions lose every game they played last year.” I sure did. I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, the Lions are consistently one of the most entertaining franchises around. They aren’t “good” in any traditional sense of the word, nor is there any chance of them becoming “good” anytime soon. But they aren’t dull.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:08 pm
Face it you baseball fans, your sport is dying…..deal with it.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:11 pm
Bravo, Ape. Ratings definitely are good measure of quality. That’s why Ufford writes all those posts about how awesome Entourage is and thankfully ignores all those boring shows like The Wire and Mad Men.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:18 pm
Baseball experienced live at the stadium – a fun afternoon.
Baseball experienced on TV – wait…what’s on Spike again? Maxim models battle to the death? *CLICK*
And it’s no contest. Football > Baseball. Shit, the baseball players had to get roided up in order to get our attention!
/dismisses the needles in NFL locker rooms
//ignores the test results for Merryman, Pat Williams, Charles Grant, et al.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:19 pm
OUR READERSHIP HAS BEEN INFECTED BY FILTHY BASEBALL FANS!
August 12th, 2009 at 1:23 pm
“Yeah, well, none of the four games from its series last week came within sniffing distance of the ratings pulled in by the Hall of Fame Game Sunday between the Titans and Bills. Yes, the first preseason game between two NFL teams of low-to-middling popularity wiped its ass with MLB’s crown jewel of overhyped steroidery.”
That sentence just made my month. Fuck baseball, and especially fuck the Yankees and Red Sox. And a big giant fuck you goes out to ESPN for dedicating a solid 6 hours of daily coverage to just those two teams. Damn, I can’t wait for real football to start so baseball doesn’t matter at all anymore.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
Comes down to this:
Baseball: Great in person, not so much on TV
Football: Great on TV, not so much in person
Which sport is really going to win in this country?
The one ten feet from your fridge.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
Andres Galarraga. The Big Cat. Interesting choice.
August 12th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
The one ten feet from your fridge. And five feet from a clean bathroom. And a foot away from a functioning laptop that’s updating your FF scores in real-time (or is providing you with porn if your FF team sucks balls).
August 12th, 2009 at 1:36 pm
I dont care what you say you aren’t getting my billy ripken fuckface card
August 12th, 2009 at 1:40 pm
I’ll step up and give baseball credit when its earned it. The sport has given us two of the biggest fan revolts in the past 50 years.
Disco Demolition night: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disco_Demolition_Night
Ten cent beer night: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ten_Cent_Beer_Night
August 12th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
KSK is one of my favorite sites, but the anti-baseball talk pisses the shit out of me. I love football too, but can understand people who also find it boring due to time between plays, timeouts, replays, commercials. The fact that there are football talking head shows every day of the week when there is usually only one day of games is pretty absurd as well. You make it sound like the biggest reason you hate baseball is because it’s not football, which is a ridiculous point of view. Yes it’s the only major sport going on in this country right now, so what do you expect is going to dominate the sports pages? Like I said, I love football, but the baseball hatred on this site has got to go.
http://www.hulu.com/watch/59224/late-night-with-conan-obrien-old-time-baseball
August 12th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
I like simple pleasures, like butter in my ass, lollipops in my mouth. That’s just me. That’s just something that I enjoy.
Can’t we like both?
August 12th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
To me, baseball is only enjoyable when it involves schadenfreude.
Watching the Red Sox lose to the Yankees, to the cries of FACK, is a beautiful thing to behold.
But really, it sucks. Seriously, you’re going to give players bats AND helmets, and not allow them to bludgeon each other? What the fuck is that?
August 12th, 2009 at 1:55 pm
“Face it you baseball fans, your sport is dying…..deal with it.”
Maybe in your masturbation fantasies. Attendance has risen, with a few exceptions, every year this decade. Dipping a little this year because of the recession and, yes, probably some roids backlash. That’ll linger for a few years, no doubt. But it ain’t dying, and it really isn’t even suffering on a grand scale.
People who hate baseball because of the pace are the premature ejaculators of the sports world. God forbid there be a sport that isn’t dictated by a damn clock. If the Phillies could have taken a knee in 1993, would have been a pretty dull end. Compare that to the 9 out of 10 football games that end with an anti-climactic pile-ups and knees, hiding behind that big ugly clock. To be fair, certainly the clock lends a lot as far as tension and drama goes. Very much granted…nothing like the last 2 minutes of a close football game when the offense, behind a score or less, is charging. But man, those games that just sputter to completion, as they often do…wow, talk about exciting!
Furthermore, baseball’s ratio of crybaby prima donnas is comparatively non-existent, specially now that Bonds is donzo. There are plenty of pricks who play baseball, but we just don’t have the Ochocincos, the TOs, the Vicks, the Britfarrs, and so on. Yeah yeah, pluck examples from the MLB, they’re there. But ask the average, unbiased sports fan (oxymoron?) what sport they associate with and “prima donna” and “high-profile douchebag”, and I bet 7 out of 10 will say football. 2 will say the NBA, and Ape will say baseball.
Look, obviously none of us would be here if we didn’t like football…it’s a great sport, brilliantly marketed and scheduled, and it’s perfect for GIMME GIMME GIMME America, most of whom seem to be posting comments here actually. I can’t wait for the NCAA (and to a lesser extent, the NFL) to get rolling. So no hate for football…I just think baseball is better, and snicker at whiny jackoffs who gripe about steroids, season length, etc.
Hey, if you think the season is overlong, I don’t know what to tell you really. I mean you all all seemed to take solace in this blog post, probably pumped your fists and chuckled confidently and emailed your friends the link. Awesome! I hope it made your day. Meanwhile, I’ll continue watching this incredibly long season and purchasing the Extra Innings package and flipping to football during the commercials as you all cry over the World Series bumping the Simpsons. Have a great day!
August 12th, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Regardless of your personal opinion on baseball….can’t we at least all agree that watching pre-season NFL is about as enjoyable as getting your cock slammed in a car door?
August 12th, 2009 at 1:57 pm
I like football and baseball.
What a dipshit I am.
That said, I like one of the baseball teams that has a chance in April. There’s maybe 7 or 8 of them. Right now, about 25 of the 32 NFL teams can talk themselves into thinking they have a real shot to make some noise. Advantage pigskin.
Fewer TV personalities that make me want to adjust my TV settings with a sledgehammer – big advantage to baseball. Especially considering the two worst in baseball (Buck and Berman) are probably even worse in football.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
/five of hours of Leno in Primetime? Just what everybody wants!!
I want his god damn show to tank so hard.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:11 pm
Despite the fact that baseball sucks so gawd damn hard, it has produced some fantastic sports movies.
So there’s thaaaaaaaat…
August 12th, 2009 at 2:21 pm
“V-A Day”? Who did we defeat?… Atlantis?
August 12th, 2009 at 2:23 pm
@ ORLY
Thanks for the diatribe!!! Seriously, you convinced me now. Look at the demographics…..young people just don’t watch the sport like they do in football, the majority of baseball fans are older. Hence, the sport is dying….slowly….but dying nonetheless.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
Will continue to watch the Yankees until they win the World Series and PEDROIAAAAAH’s tears drip down like the earth quenching rain…but I agree that beisbol can’t hold the NFL’s sweaty jockstrap and can’t wait until tomorrow night so I can watch THE MUTHA EFFIN COWBOYS WIPE THE FIELD WITH THOSE COCKSNOT RAIIIIIIIIIIIIDAAAAAAAAHS.
/YEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
//takes deep breaths
///excited…for reals
August 12th, 2009 at 2:30 pm
The real difference between the 2 games is that football fans are interested in the entire nfl, but baseball fans are really only interested in heir teams. I would probably never watch an average red sox yankees game on a sunday in august if ted williams torso was roaming right field. But if my teams playing, the pace of the game or the sanctimony from the costas’ of the world or whatver other nonsense that goes w/ it does not matter to me. The seahawks went 13-3 in 05 and went to a super bowl, but i didnt get has as much satisfaction from that as i do from the average meaningless august mariners victory. The emotional attachment i get in 16 drawn out glorified miller lite commercials on sunday could never compare to 162 games of baseball. So, yes I’d rather watch the hall of fame game than red sox-yankees, but that doesnt mean football is more important or dominant.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:32 pm
I agree with 85…. the one thing I will grant the NFL over MLB is parity. MLB’s lack of a salary cap is insane, especially when you consider the amount of money that baseball teams throw at players every off-season. It leads to a distinct upper/lower class system, and creates a ridiculously unbalanced league. The NFL doesn’t have this problem, and the sport is much more refreshing because of it.
Despite this, I will always like baseball as a sport more than football, and will always like MLB more than the NFL. Sorry!
August 12th, 2009 at 2:36 pm
HOW-AHH DAARR YOU DISMISS OWWAAHHH PAIN!!!! NO ONE HAS SUFFERED LIKE RED SOX NATION!! WE AHH IN MOARNIN’!
/drinks more Wild Turkey
PEDROIAAAHHH!!! YOU FAAAAAAAAAACCCCKKKKK!!!!
August 12th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
While everyone is, of course, free to loathe baseball as much as they like, I can’t help but wonder why you harp on baseball’s steroids issue – multiple times – as some form of indicator of how much better Football is? If there is ONE thing that NFL fans shouldn’t bitch about it, it’s steroids.
As for the NFL game trouncing baseball’s viewer ratings, eh, it’s like OPEC. Turn down the faucet and the price of oil goes up. It’s artificially created scarcity, which fuels demand. If an NFL team played more games, people would watch fewer of them (and would anyone bother with pre-season games?)
That said, woot football. We’re coming upon the glorious months again when both sports are on TV. God I hate February.
Oh, and fuck the NBA.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:50 pm
Basebal sucks cock and so does anyone who watches it.
Also, “pisses the shit out of me.” sounds like a very very uncomfortable and gay activity.
/baseball fans LOVE to get their shit pissed out of them.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:03 pm
Overhyped Steroidery
where was this stuff when the fantasy team naming guide came out?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
Spoken like a true Pittsburgher Monkeyboy. I’m pretty sure baseball in Pittsburgh does suck.
At least baseball doesn’t foist minor league hamlets like Nashville, Jacksonville, and Green Bay Wisconsin on me and try to tell me those are actually important cities.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Cricket > Baseball
August 12th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
Ape, this was unbelievably great.
Stop making me like you. It’s uncomfortable.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
I have been a baseball and football fan for many years. I can honestly say that I cannot for the life of me remember the last time I sat down and watched an entire baseball game from beginning to end.
Football on the other hand, last season.
During the course of an average baseball game I can go to the store, mow the lawn, workout a little bit, feed the fish, wax a car ….. then pickup the action in the top of the eighth and not miss much usually.
Can’t do that with NFL games, sorry.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
Oh yea Cheerleader reminded me. The NBA sucks. Cock !
August 12th, 2009 at 3:31 pm
…so is liking both baseball AND football not an option?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
I’m a huge Steelers fan…
/leaves time for large chrous of boos
I’m also a huge Pirates fan… yes there are a few of us. But being big fans of both of these teams affords me an oppurtunity to speak on one aspect of baseball that can be slightly more exciting than football. Even when rooting for a bad team that often loses games (or 8 in the row, of late) I have the oppurtunity to say, “well at least they play tomorrow.” And that in turn provides me with a little glimmer of hope for a better today. In contrast, when the Steelers lose, I go into a funk for days because I have to wait so long for a shot at redemption. While I find the NFL much more entertaining on the whole, this is one thing that I will give baseball.
Course, i don’t have to worry about too many funks as the Steelers don’t lose very often…
/replays Super Bowl XL and XLIII in head… im only 22 and am not one of those assholes who speaks about championships one before my lifetime
August 12th, 2009 at 3:52 pm
Who knew baseball fans were even more fun to piss off than Ravens fans?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
I’m going to call semi-shenanigans on the complain that the MLB lacks parity. Sure, there’s a clear caste system regarding salaries, and that gives a huge advantage to monied teams, but last year the Yankees didn’t even make the playoffs. As for teams with a shot at the playoffs, right now literally half of the teams in the league are in first place or within four games of the wild card.
I used to think watching baseball on tv was boring. Then I learned the difference between a 1-2 count and a 2-1 count, and the inherent drama of every at bat came into focus.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
I’m a Yankees and Jets fan…I need baseball to give my sports life purpose and hope!
August 12th, 2009 at 3:54 pm
Football is great. I’ll take college over the NFL tough. Baseball is great too. And I’ll take a nice cheap AAA game anyday. Hell, I went last night and it cost me $38 for the game, parking, and 4 beers. $29 actually, seeing that they let you turn in unused seasons for a game day ticket. We all know hockey is the greatest sport on the planet anyway.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:17 pm
The football prima-donnas are some of what make the sport great. There’s nothing like listening to two teams talk noise throughout the week and then lay it all on the field, knocking out chumps and smashing fools.
/Jim Rome off
I can’t get behind a game that gets played daily. Sure, these guys qualify as athletes, but if they can play EVERY SINGLE DAY, what the hell does one friggin’ game matter? A football game can be a life-changing event for any player on the field. NFL films has transformed the sport into a literal opera of dramatic violence. The nature of the sport and the players involved makes every game just a little bit different. In the summer, I turn off Sportscenter when Top Plays comes on. Really? The shortstop made a diving barehanded grab and threw it first? I dare you to find one day out of the baseball season that that SAME HIGHLIGHT WITH A DIFFERENT JERSEY isn’t a top play.
Fuck baseball. I watched the end of the Buerhle perfect game because NFL Live got interrupted. How DARE they.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
Wait, wait. There are people saying that MLB doesn’t have parity?
Within the last 11 years most of the teams in the NL (10 of 16) have been to the World Series. 10 different league champions in 11 years (St. Louis is the “dynasty” that managed to go twice). Can the AFC or NFC say that? If small market teams can only compete in football, how is it that Detroit, San Diego, San Francisco, Miami, Houston, and Cleveland can produce a World Series team but not a Superbowl one? Hell, for that matter both NY and Boston (the only two cities with a shot at a WS, according to some of y’all) have sniffed the Super Bowl more recently than they have the World Series.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
RE: Baseball Slash says:
The best things about going to a game are the hotdogs, beer and, if you’re a guy, watching the parade of tits (the female ones, anyway) go by, encased in thin summer fabrics.
Amen, Slash. I just went to a AAA game between two National League team affiliates I don’t care about (I’m a Twins fan) and it was a cheap, fun summer evening. I think I spent more time watching the girls and shooting the shit with my buddies than watching the actual game.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
@ Gino:
Minor League Baseball beats the everloving shit out of anything that any major pro league has to offer. In Round Rock you can bring a blanket and spread out in the outfield, there are specialty beers at reasonable prices, there’s no parking fee, and oftentimes they are literally handing out tickets at the door.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:58 pm
Tom in Texas has the right idea there. They used to let you bring jugs into the AAA stadium here. Used to go in with a couple of vodka/tea or vodka lemonade, a few pounds of salted peanuts in the shell, and for $9 relax out in right field.
Granted, baseball is a lot more interesting when you follow the little nuances of the game. But boozing helps. The only reason people go to Bills games is to get fucked up tailgating. No on in their right mind likes sitting on frozen metal bleachers in 2 degree weather to watch a perennial 7-9 team (who always has a chance to make the playoffs. Uh huh.)
August 12th, 2009 at 5:07 pm
Perhaps if the Sox/Yanks thing wasn’t shoved down our throats, and perhaps they didn’t play each other 10000000 times a year, maybe the rivalry would mean something. It’s kind of hard to stress the importance of a game when they have to play each other 18 times
August 12th, 2009 at 5:22 pm
@Tom, Rocco
Baseball in person if obviously better than on TV, but going to an MLB game is such an investment. Minor league games are more fun. I can go to a AAA game for $10 and if the game sucks I can stop paying attention or leave without feeling guilty.
Football is different. going to NFL games is great, but I’d rather watch it at home. But seeing hockey in person- that’s the best.
August 12th, 2009 at 5:28 pm
Parity in baseball is a joke. There are five teams that have a shot to contend year in and year out simply because of their pay rolls: Yanks, Bosox, Cubs, Angels, Dodgers and, to a lesser extent, the Chisox and Phillies. Every other team in baseball fluctuates between one or two competitive years, possibly resulting in a World Series run, and mediocrity stemming from good, home-grown players bolting for more money. With mediocrity comes salary dumps, lob-sided trades, (if you happen be a professional baseball team in the city of Pittsburgh) seventeen years without sniffing the playoffs, and…. I think I may be talking myself onto the NFL bandwagon, so I’m going to stop. But yeah, baseball is definitely flawed.
I just can’t wait till the NFL’s CBA runs out in a couple of years. The lack of a salary cap will do wonders for the sport. Can’t wait for those inevitable Redskins dynasties.
August 12th, 2009 at 5:44 pm
Ape: “So, with the KSK Baseball reform package currently being debated in Congress, we have as a nation a real chance to do away with the huge wastes of time produced by pitching changes, pinch hitters, rain delays, extra innings and the New York Mets. What we propose is 60 minutes of hard-nosed gridiron action, and with an emphasis on devastating injuries to prissy, self-important quarterbacks. Now, we will allocate…”
Baseball Fan: “Who are you to tell me what competitive sporting events I can enjoy? Our founding fathers promised us the right to sitting on our asses for over 3 hours, with the sole promise of maybe 10 minutes of actual action. Anyone who tries to change that is a socialist!”
Ape: “Sir, there are millions of Americans out there without any kind of sports coverage, and this football plan will allow for NFL access to everyone across the nation, on Sundays and Monday nights. Even in Los A-”
Detroit Fan: “Excuse me, what about us fans that are happy with our current Baseball teams that are winning more games than not, and refuse to switch over to a Football team that hasn’t won shit?”
Ape: “This bill does not require you to switch from your current plan to the one that is obviously more superior. And the rumors you’ve heard are completely false; we will not kill Vin Scully, but we will kill Tim McCarver. We can all agree that is in the best interests of all Americans.”
“Local” fan: “OBAMA IS A FACKING DAHHHHHHKIE!!! HE DIDN’T SHIP THE ENTI-AH YANKEE ROST-AH OUT TO GITMO! HE’S A FACKIN TRAIT-AH! SWEEPING THE RED SAWX IS A CRIME AGAINST HUMANITY! NO ONE DENIES THIS BECAUSE I PLAN ON SCREAMIN FO-AH THE NEXT 2 HOU-AHS!”
Ape: “You’re not from Pittsburgh, or New York, or wherever the hell city I live in. What the fuck are you doing here?”
TAWMMY: “YANKEES SACK! DAVID OATEEZ IS A FACKIN HERO, UNTIL HE RETI-AHS AND SUDDENLY BECOMES A FACKIN DISGRACE TO THE RED SAWX NATION!”
Ape: “Fuck it. This town hall meeting is over.”
August 12th, 2009 at 5:57 pm
@AJ:
This must be why the Cubs and Dodgers are fighting it out for the NL Championship every year. I’m so tired of Pittsburgh Pirate fans blaming the league for their shitty GM and ownership. But surely if the league said the Pirates could only spend 65 million a year they would more than double their payroll to get there, right? The problem in Pittsburgh is not the Red Sox. The problem in Pittsburgh is Robert Nutting, and before him McClatchey. If Rooney owned the Pirates you wouldn’t have gone 17 years.
August 12th, 2009 at 6:18 pm
haha, whatever, douchebag. pirates suck my balls. only one game out of the red sox/yankees series had national coverage so you’re whole not one of the 4 games touched the hall of fame game is retarded.
baseball > football
August 12th, 2009 at 6:25 pm
Who would win in a Battle Royale between Bob Costas, Will Leitch, Ken Burns and George Will? I’d shell out $40 on pay-per-view for that. I think Costas would take it- he’d fight dirty.
August 12th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
“At least baseball doesn’t foist minor league hamlets like Nashville, Jacksonville, and Green Bay Wisconsin on me and try to tell me those are actually important cities.”
It’s because the NFL is set up like socialist China. Your team makes no money and sucks bad? Don’t worry. Here’s a first round draft pick and a hard salary cap so your mediocre city/town/shithole can feel important with a competitive football team. Football is also more popular than baseball because 9 out of 10 southern rednecks prefers football.
August 12th, 2009 at 6:55 pm
Football is also more popular than baseball because 9 out of 10 southern rednecks prefers football.
No, that’s why college football is popular.
FIX YO RETARDED ARGUMENTS!
August 12th, 2009 at 7:32 pm
OK. I like baseball and football although baseball is my favorite sport, just cause. But I can’t understand why football fans have to hate baseball so much. The reason I quit reading withleather (no offense to all) is because I got tired of a general sports site telling me why baseball sucked every morning.
Because I’m a baseball fan, I better rely on some stats. Accoring to the 2008 Harris poll NFL is the most popular sport (duh) and, of its fans, the lowest percentage of fans were “those with a post graduate education (23%)”. Huh.
http://www.harrisinteractive.com/harris_poll/index.asp?PID=866
Baseball’s a long season. It’s a grind, just like life. Wait, where the fuck was I going with this?
August 12th, 2009 at 7:46 pm
I like Foxy Boxing
August 12th, 2009 at 9:44 pm
@ Tom
I am in no way shape or form a Pirates fan…. I was simply using them as an example of a shitty mid-market team. There is no shared marketing agreement in MLB as there is in the NFL; this leads to a major gap between the rich and the poor. I totally agree that the Pirates are bad because of their shitty ownership, but even if they did their jobs and drafted well, they would ultimately get screwed out of their home grown talent by richer teams. Mid-market teams simply can’t compete year in and year out like the major markets do. They essentially become glorified farm teams. I will grant you that there are always a couple that make decent runs for a year or two, but they ultimately get screwed by the Yankees or Red Sox.
/bitter about losing CC
//bitter about losing Lee
///bitter about losing V-mart
////bitter about inevitably losing Grady
August 12th, 2009 at 10:23 pm
@ AJ: At least you have an autumn of Brady to look forward to.
August 12th, 2009 at 11:11 pm
Longest comments ever on this site. You should post about religion tomorrow…
August 12th, 2009 at 11:32 pm
What city IS Ape from?
August 12th, 2009 at 11:41 pm
@Gino – I love Foxy Boxing! It combines my two favorite things: boxing, and referees.
I like baseball and football equally. I find the ensuing butt-hurt in the comments from the football-worshipping jamooks and the whiny, insecure baseball fans hilarious.
August 13th, 2009 at 3:30 am
“Football is also more popular than baseball because 9 out of 10 southern rednecks prefers football.
No, that’s why college football is popular.
FIX YO RETARDED ARGUMENTS!”
And that’s why Tampa Bay, Jacksonville, Tennessee, and Carolina all have thriving pro football franchises and Los Angeles doesn’t even have it’s own team?
Redneck America loves 2 thing Football (whether it’s college or pro) and Nascar.
August 13th, 2009 at 9:12 am
After seeing the lead picture I thought this would be an Emo Eagles post.
August 13th, 2009 at 10:13 am
For all the Costas hate, I think his book Fair Ball is a great read regarding the issues in baseball, especially the lack of cap system.
August 13th, 2009 at 10:15 am
*…lack of a…
August 13th, 2009 at 12:43 pm
@AJ:
Assuming you are a Cleveland fan and not an Indians one, $10 bucks says your Injuns make another WS (like the one they made a bit over 10 years back) before the Browns make their first SB. By the way, the fact that the Pirates haven’t made the playoffs in 17 year isn’t an argument for a cap. It’s an argument for diluting the playoffs the way the other sports have. Just follow the NBA model and let half the league play in the post season. No team will ever have a long drought again!
There is a revenue sharing agreement in place in MLB today. It’s called the luxury tax. It’s been in place since something like 2001.
I’d like to believe that if MLB just handed low revenue teams $$, they would spend it on player payroll. I really would. unfortunately, I’ve seen the way thee owners work. What they will do is take NY’s money and dump even more players, then turn a 40 million profit despite drawing 5,000 a game because their entire facility is state subsidized. And a cap will make no difference. It’s not like they are even remotely close to having it affect them.
As far as salary caps on competitive balance, the examples are multifold of why it does not work.
There is a FAR greater disparity between the top and bottom in the NBA or NFL than MLB (name me the last MLB team that went winless). NBA teams regularly when 65-70 games, which is the equivalent of a 140 win season. The worst NFL/NBA teams win at around a .250 clip in a good year, again far worse than MLB. In both cases what is a common occurrence that happens several times a year in the NBA or NFL has happened in single digits in the history of the sport for baseball.
I know, I know, “but baseball has a longer season. Plus it’s just inherently more random.”So let’s compare the same sports pre and post cap. Both basketball and football were more competitive before they instituted a cap (link at end of post). I am telling you guys that there has never been an example of a league that increased competitiveness by instituting a cap. The NFL is less competitive today than it was in the ’70’s.
The salary cap does one thing. Makes billionaires richer by colluding to deny millionaires a few more million. It does not affect the price of a game (is the NFL cheaper or more expensive for you today than it used to be?) It does not affect balance (were the Browns/Lions/Chiefs better pre or post cap?) I am not going to fall for that crap just ‘cuz Bud Selig (who oh so coincidentally stands to make millions as an owner if a cap is instituted) tells me it has to happen. If it’s that hard to be competitive, sell the damn team and stop begging for money on street corners in other towns.
The quoted text is from a book by seeral Stanford Economits called “The Wages of Wins.” So that they don’t look like total gibberish, know that the Null-Scully Index measures the difference in a league’s performance from a perfect mean where everyone goes .500 and a league is perfectly balanced. The higher the number, the less competitive the league.
“From 1992 to 2005, the Noll-Scully measure in the NFL was 1.483. From 1976 to 1991 the Noll-Scully was 1.487. In simple words, competitive balance did not improve in the NFL with the institution of the cap on payrolls.
How about a bit more perspective? The NBA shares television revenue, like the NFL, and also has a cap on payrolls. The NBA even adds a cap on individual salaries. But relative to both versions of football, the NBA is not competitively balanced. The average Noll-Scully from the 1976-77 season to 2005-06 in the NBA was 2.70. ”
http://dberri.wordpress.com/2006/05/20/nfl-institutional-policy-and-competitive-balance/
August 13th, 2009 at 12:59 pm
You’ll note by the way they refer to it as a “payroll cap.” That’s because that is what we are talking about. We are not discussing a salary cap. Matt Stafford, Eli Manning, and LeBron James are all well aware that players still get an ok salary in today’s pro leagues. The top flight players will , and do, still get paid. The players hurt are the midrange vets who will be dropped for an endless supply of cheap young rookie talent.
A “salary cap” is a cap on payroll. It is collusion among owners to keep their labor costs below a certain level. It is not a salary cap.
Oh and Costas is a douche that does nothing more than kiss owner ass. Oh, well, Bobby’s gotta pay the bills.