
Last November, the Pittsburgh Steelers rolled into Raljon with thousands of Terrible Towel waving fans in tow and kicked the living bejesus out of the Washington Redskins. The Skins brain trust immediately went to work to remedy the most glaring shortcoming. Did they adjust their pass-rush schemes? Tinker with their zone blocking? No, that would require actual football acumen. Rather the following week, the team handed out towels of their own. The move was widely ridiculed and relegated to the dustbin of failed promotions—or so we thought.
But this weekend, the Steelers are coming back to DC. So in an effort to avoid embarrassment (in the stands, at least) the Skins are bringing the idea out of mothballs and will distribute 50,000 of the “Redskins Rally” towels to fans. The team is eschewing their traditional burgundy and gold for the presumably cheaper white. Because nothing says “stand brave and fight” like waving a white flag above one’s head.
“I think it’s fun that we’re doing the same thing. It’s a preseason game, but you know what, we’ve got great fans. I think Dan wants to continue to show his support and his enthusiasm for this team, for this community, so I think it’s all in … good fun. He’s competitive. We’re competitive. Now, I don’t know if there’s going to be battle of the towels or whatever. But it’ll be fun.”
You know what’s a good way to reveal that you don’t think something is a very good idea? Keep repeating how “fun” it is over and over. Unless, where Zorn comes from “fun” means “horribly unoriginal and embarrassing”. In that case, I completely agree. Seriously, there are several characteristics of the Steelers worthy of emulation– but flourishing your jizz mopper is not one of them.
[ credits: Jason Reid & Steinz at WaPo, USA Today ]
[ UPDATE: Drew didn't have time for a proper "This Week in F--k You" column, but he did send in this video edition. Check it out. Warning: some NSFW language. ]


my new favorite website solely for the Raljon comment.
Mike, don’t be such a retard.
walter, what does retarded have to do with anything? the fact that you can buy a Vick NFL jersey isn’t retarded. It’s absurb, ridiculous, maddening. You shouldn’t use the word retarded as it demeans people with special needs. Then again, I’m assuming you’re not in middle school.
Obviously Snyder got rooked on some(other) deal and now everyone gets a complimentary golf towel.
And I’m ashamed to say I’m still laughing about the comments Mr. Big Boned Potty Mouth generated. If ever there was someone begging to be called a round mound of assclown.
Good to see Drew has lost some weight!
Because nothing says “stand brave and fight” like waving a white flag above one’s head.
France concurs.
“Some” NSFW language? I count one word used a lot.
Waving WHITE towels? Uh…did the Redskins suits not even remotely consider the flaw with this plan?
Look…it’s Tunison 2.0 http://www.cnn.com/2009/TECH/08/21/outing.anonymous.bloggers/index.html
I”M TORN!
The stairway to seven just got longer.
you faggots need 2 get a life or a girlfriend, hiddin behind your computers. get out into the world u cornball pussies
So exactly why I are you posting anonymously, or are you a man who likes chin nutz?
Go wack it into your surrender towel
“Redskins Surrender Towels” FTW.
It didn’t work for General Custer, but the Redskins think it will work for them? Ah the delicious irony.
redskins “fans”. thats cute.
Way to go Redskins fans. Now, you have your Redskins Surrender Towels.
The Redskins shall fight for last place in the NFC East, again, this season. Why?
Adding Albert Haynesworth shall improve marginally an already good defense. Yet, Redskins management did nothing to improve one of the worst offenses in the NFL.
Campbell needs to throw the ball toward the endzone more. While having a good TD-to-pick ratio last season (13/6), tossing only 13 TDs in the NFL isn’t going to do the job.
Portis racked up useless yards. Thousands of yards gained between the 30 yard line markers amount to meaningless yards if such gains do not translate into points.
Drew never has time for “This Week in F-CK You” anymore
/sniffle
Didn’t have time? DIDN’T HAVE TIME????
FIE!
Also, dear God, Redskins fans, have some goddamn pride. If not in your abortion of a team, then at least in your fucking selves.
“You’re the worst promotion ever, Towelie.”
“Yeah, I know.”
Drew has really let himself go.
At least this is better than the battle of towel pulling/snapping gheys featuring the 49ers and Chargers.
Terrible Towel + Redskins Rally =/= Sexy.
dont you mean cooch zorn?
“wait aminute….i got it! thats the melody to funky town!”
Stop ripping me off (hoo hoo)
No, you’re a towel.
those pansy white towels are not even worth stomping.
The Redskins might want to start by addressing their inability to complete a forward pass, lack of pass rush, pourous run defense, shithole secondary and what to do after week 4 when Portis bitches out like his name is LaDanian and it’s January before they worry about promotional giveaways.
/Hides head in shame
//Peeks through fingers to see if the Skins are any good this year.
also, has anyone seen that for 40 bucks you can buy a Vick jersey for your dog at the NFL shop. THAT is truly retarded.
Sadly, not anymore. You put in the #7 and names like “VICK” or “MEXICO” and the NFL customizer won’t let you.
Foreskins. That’s rich, I’ll say.
The only time I’ve seen the white towel thing work well was in the 1991 World Series. The twins fans really had the “Homer Hankies” going and made it damn tough on my Braves.
/fucking Charlie Liebrandt
//damn Lonnie Smith
Who will look lamest waving their shitty, $1.99 towelette above their heads?
when will all other NFL teams learn…the only good fan prop is the cheesehead…cause it’s original and regio-specific. plus, it makes the user look smart. evey other prop is stupid and should be banned.
also, has anyone seen that for 40 bucks you can buy a Vick jersey for your dog at the NFL shop. THAT is truly retarded.
It’s a friggin preseason game. What are they going to do with the 45,000 leftover towels?
Oh, I get it. The Foreskins are letting their fans officially throw in the towel on the season. Now.
Imitation isn’t the sincerest form of flattery. It is however the easiest way to make a cheap buck. Snyder has built a career on it. A towel here, a 100k seat stadium there, acquiring last year’s hero… I am content to stand back and get out of the man’s way.
Are none of these people familiar with the “throwing in the towel” idiom?
And could “Battle of the Towel-Twirling Dipshits” be a regular feature, please?
When did Drew start wearing glasses?
Those are prescription eating glasses.
When did Drew start wearing glasses?
/shame