HERE IS A PICTURE OF AN ATTRACTIVE WOMAN. NOW PLEASE SEND US EMAIL.
Consider this your weekly fantasy sex/football mailbag reminder. Slight spoiler alert: earlier this week we received the best mailbag question we’ve ever gotten, and if you can beat it with an *honest* question I will PayPal you five dollars. American dollars, even. I don’t want to give the details of it away, but the question in question combines subjects of sex and fantasy football in a way that involves (alleged!) pedophilia, jail time, and the proper way to handle Goodell-like fantasy league suspensions.
Frankly, if no one else writes in, I’ll be perfectly happy.
Tags: Mailbag Reminders, quick hits
August 12th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
Wow, now I have (e)mail performance anxiety. Can that count as a sex question?
August 12th, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Pedophilia? Finally a question in this groups wheelhouse.
August 12th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
meh, i dont get out of bed unless theres Bestiality involved.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
What about bestial pedonecrophilia? Can anyone top that?
And I’ll have you know that the young miss in the photo is wearing that dress all wrong. It’s covering her boobies up!
August 12th, 2009 at 3:18 pm
Pfft. I’m just too scared to ever write in again.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
what a fucking tease. just like that chick in the dress.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:23 pm
Does jerking off into a burnt terrible towel make it more or less pleasurable?
/continues rummaging through Tunison’s garbage.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
for what its worth rocco, I thought that girl looked good. by that I mean, i printed those pictures out and hung them in my cubicle and now tell people she’s my girlfriend.
August 12th, 2009 at 3:30 pm
i highly suggest clicking for the big image of that picture. does anyone know her name so i can creepily google image her?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
So…Marcus Vick wrote in to see where his brother rates?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
You will make sure there’s at least one “Help me, KSK, I’m banging my supermodel girlfriend multiple times each day, but she’s really annoying and her sister is hot and wants to do me, and also my wallet full of money is really heavy, what do I do?!?!?!?” letter, right?
August 12th, 2009 at 3:47 pm
How did you know that’s what I was gonna ask?!
August 12th, 2009 at 3:47 pm
…the question in question combines subjects of sex and fantasy football in a way that involves (alleged!) pedophilia, jail time, and the proper way to handle Goodell-like fantasy league suspensions.
Could someone show Ape’s dad how to use Urban Dictionary so he can just look his questions up like the rest of us?
August 12th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Is KSK part of a Pedophilia network now? Do we need special passwords? I don’t think I’m going to like jail.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Too bad my sex drive disappeared with the woman who just left me in ruins otherwise I could have had a gloating ‘I’ve been enjoying copious amounts of screaming monkey circus sex, anal, blowjob during football games, blah blah blah, don’t really have a FF question, just wanted to gloat’ email so everyone could hate me.
But alas, she had to break my heart and I assumed any advice I’d get here would be along the lines of revenge/drunk/one night stand fucks. Instead, I’m moving to Hawaii.
/dick joke somewhere in there
//seriously moving
///just found a house to rent
August 12th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
@pirate sloth, sorry mate. that sucks. enjoy hula dancers grinding on your cock though! could be worse though, at least its not depressing as her dying like the poor dude and dudette in last mail bag
August 12th, 2009 at 4:32 pm
@ Pirate Sloth,
Sorry to hear that.
You know what heals a broken heart?
Murder.
Think about it.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:37 pm
PS: just realized that now everyone can hate on me for moving to Hawaii, though you get the last laugh, I have to wake up at 8am just to watch the Seahawks lose away games.
August 12th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
@QLJ The hover tag on the pic says ‘candace’. That’s all I got.
/deek jook
August 12th, 2009 at 5:26 pm
Her NAME DAMNIT………… NOW!
August 12th, 2009 at 6:09 pm
For Candace:
Well, brunettes are fine man & blondes are fun
But when it comes to gettin’ a dirty job done
I’ll take a Red-headed woman
Well i don’t know how many girls you’ve dated
But you ain’t lived ’til you’ve had your tires rotated
By a Red-headed woman
-Springsteen
/fond memories of my former Red-headed woman
//jailtime may have been involved
August 12th, 2009 at 9:25 pm
That picture is fan-fucking-tastic! I am going to tape it to the back of my girlfriend’s head tonight.
August 13th, 2009 at 9:33 am
@ The Pirate Sloth: I’ve avoided sending that email to the mailbag as well. I’m not sure I want to know what the KSK staff and commenters would recommend for a broken heart. Other than lots of drinking.
August 13th, 2009 at 11:55 am
Slashes’s comment made me choke with laughter.
/nothing witty to say
//Go Panthers!?
August 13th, 2009 at 1:10 pm
Wonder if Candace & her creamy white complexion respect the sun
August 13th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
Candace Rae