“Yo, Jay, Brah, Where Do I Stick My Dick in This Thing?”
Brah
Jay
Brahhhh
Jay
Brah, thanks for teaching me to be a badass.
You totally don’t even know how much people give me stress for losing my starting job. I don’t why they can’t let me be a chill brah and handle my biz and mack some 17-year-olds. I gotta be the best brah at everything now?
It’s like John Mayer says, brah, “live and let live,” y’know, brah?
When you told me at the Super Bowl that everyone thinks I’m a bitch, that hit right here, brah. [Pounds fist on his chest] From now on, when, like, people laugh at me for being the number two QB behind some old religious brah, that’s when I’m gonna MMA them in the face.
Yo, brah, I just realized something. Now because I’m a badass, I can rock all the Tapout and Affliction shirts. Brah! That, like, broadcasts that I’m a badass brah. Pussymagnet city! I bet even Gina Carano will let me hit it. Or her 17-year-old sister, if she has one.
You are the wisest brah I know, Jay Glazer. Even wiser than McConaughey. I’m so glad you decided to drop this knowledge on a brah. I mean, not only are you a kickass reporter, but get poon even when you obviously don’t care about your looks and get to kick it with Strahan, who seems like an okay brah himself. One day, when I totally let myself go, I hope to be just like you, brah.
So now that our brahmance has bloomed, can I stop doing push-ups?
Tags: brah, matt leinart, xmas ape
![[badge]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/themes/default/images/100121_FOXmsnBadge_200x50.gif)
June 10th, 2009 at 9:50 am
brahmance
Is that love for Brahma? I’ll leave the tired Simpsons Shiva H. Vishnu quotes aside.
Quality stuff Ape.
June 10th, 2009 at 9:50 am
i think this gashstain was born with a tribal tat on his bicep
June 10th, 2009 at 9:53 am
So 9 months until Leinart is paying that punching bag to go away?
June 10th, 2009 at 10:12 am
I can’t wait to roll my eyes when they announce him as ‘Matt Lion Heart’… ugg.
June 10th, 2009 at 10:32 am
John Mayer is fucking gay
June 10th, 2009 at 10:42 am
If there’s no blah involved, then this can’t be true brah.
June 10th, 2009 at 10:42 am
His muscles will be stronger while holding the clipboard. Hear that Jesse Palmer?
I love the kindergarten/play-date flooring he’s training on. Where can I get some?
June 10th, 2009 at 10:42 am
I swear I lost IQ points just from reading Arizona’s Number 1 Brah’s statement.
BTW, Mark Sanchez gets NYC and supermodels…Matt Leinart gets Arizona and…ASU sluts.
Somehow I think both are happy with that arrangement.
June 10th, 2009 at 10:54 am
“Douchebag” is so overused. From now on I’m using “leinartbag”.
June 10th, 2009 at 11:01 am
You all think this is bad, just wait until Glazer introduces Leinart into the HOF in 2025.
June 10th, 2009 at 11:16 am
just wait until Glazer introduces Leinart into the HOF in 2025 to the Subway $5 footlong.
FYP
June 10th, 2009 at 11:17 am
I fail tags
June 10th, 2009 at 11:30 am
There is no more realistic fight simulation than fending off a heavy bag.
June 10th, 2009 at 11:31 am
If you haven’t manned up from 15 odd years playing football from grade school or middle school on, how is Jay Glazer going to give you manly cojones? I feel manlier and I was a girl and a marching band player, for shit’s sake.
June 10th, 2009 at 11:44 am
There’s a lot of douchebag in that picture.
June 10th, 2009 at 12:13 pm
‘…MMA him in the face.’ That is gold.
June 10th, 2009 at 12:17 pm
“I told him, ‘Everyone thinks you are a (expletive),” Glazer said, using another word for soft, “and you should want to do everything you can do to be a killer.’ ”
Everyone thinks you are a brah?
June 10th, 2009 at 1:46 pm
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/bro_youre_a_god_among_bros
This must be Leinart’s fuck buddy.
June 10th, 2009 at 2:20 pm
Isn’t this a new ride at Cedar Point just for Brady Quinn Day?
June 10th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
Like The Onion, the headline was the best part of this one. And I mean that as a compliment. Laughed my ass off.
June 11th, 2009 at 2:20 pm
I like Matt Leinart and John Mayer. I often listen to John Mayer while using the Cardinals in Madden.
February 4th, 2010 at 5:13 am
As a Newbie, I am always looking online for articles that can help me get further ahead. Thanks a million!