Comments on: Racist Girlfriends, Interracial Three-Ways, and Platonic Brotherly Love: Your KSK Fantasy Sex/Football Advice Mailbag

By: Big Black Richard

Big Black Richard — Sat, 09 May 2009 09:23:20 +0000

Also, Monica’s husband is a lucky sumbitch, and I hate him for it.

By: Big Black Richard

Big Black Richard — Sat, 09 May 2009 09:21:04 +0000

@Beaker: The thing with Racist Chick is that you’ve lost respect for her. You’re not going to be able to regain that respect, so she can’t be your girlfriend. Keep banging away if you want to, and I wouldn’t dis you for doing so, but she can’t develop into a girlfriend. She can’t even develop into a FWB, since you’d lose respect for yourself for having a racist friend. The most she can be is “this chick I’m banging.”

/Dr. Phil

By: You Are Invited

You Are Invited — Sat, 09 May 2009 04:50:06 +0000

Here’s one. How about if you guys started out hooking up, then distance turned you guys into friends. Can it go back to a hook up situation, or have you crossed the Rubicon already?

By: That'samare

That'samare — Fri, 08 May 2009 22:46:35 +0000

“From a grammar-intensive program, no doubt.” . . . That’s comedic gold right there.

@Qb dating a LB. Rule of thumb, take the total she gave you, and multiply it by three. THat’s how it works. If you were in a 15 year relationship, chances are you probably had more sex than your current girlfriend. I direct you to a quote from Silent Bob in Chasing Amy when his girlfriend told him she had screwed around with a ton of guys: “I wasn’t disgusted with her, I was afraid. At that moment, I felt small – like-like I’d lacked experience, like I’d never be on her level, like I’d never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I’m saayin’? But, what I did not get, she didn’t care. She wasn’t looking for that guy anymore. She was – she was looking for me, for-for the Bob. But, uh, by the time I figure this all out, it was too late, man. She moved on, and all I had to show for it was some foolish pride, which then gave way to regret. She was the girl, I know that now. But, I pushed her away. So I’ve spent every day since then chasing Amy… So to speak.”

@ Rectum Ranger: Go for it the 2nd or third night. The honeymoon is also time to have sex in public too. It’s totally ok cause you are a newly wed.

By: Needs More Cheerleaders

Needs More Cheerleaders — Fri, 08 May 2009 19:45:26 +0000

Only okay for a chick to call another chick a cunt if it’s got the right meaning, as in my best friend and I call each other that (and a host of other insulting terms) and it’s okay, but if a random girl said that I’d be pretty pissed.

Carrie,

You’ve officially become my dream girl.

By: Jebus

Jebus — Fri, 08 May 2009 17:23:55 +0000

Late, but I think that we need a regular column from Monica. I don’t feel old enough as it is.

By: AU Insult Fairy

AU Insult Fairy — Fri, 08 May 2009 17:19:16 +0000

Now that the racism argument is over, can Beaker please win me $50 by confirming that the girl goes to Georgetown?

By: Nate Newon's Van

Nate Newon's Van — Fri, 08 May 2009 15:40:29 +0000

Dolphin fans have a problem with Matt Ryan at quarterback? Wait, Parcells drafted who instead? haha! That reminds me of the time Parcells passed on Stephen Jackson in favor of Julius Jones.

(Yeah, I know Parcells picked up a #1 for trading down but then he wasted the pick on Marcus Spears, so fuck him.)

By: jackin'4beats

jackin'4beats — Fri, 08 May 2009 13:54:54 +0000

You listen to me and you listen good, because nobody else in your life will have the sack to say this: Gambling makes everything more exciting. Bet on everything you can.

Thank you for the advice Gunnery Sergeant Hartman!

And oh yeah, dump that racist chick – college campuses are small places no matter how many students go there so if the word got out, you’d be overflowing in symapthy poon in no time. Where is she from? Ohio?

By: wtf?

wtf? — Fri, 08 May 2009 13:48:32 +0000

Chick is great in the sack but he’s worried because she said nigger? Seriously? I’d let my woman call me “cracka ass cracka” so long as she put my dick in her mouth.