JAMES HARRISON NOT RETARDED AFTER ALL! He’s just a really bad liar. Apparently the guy just has an acute fear of flying and that is why he’s foregoing the trip to D.C. later this week to meet his worship, Cliff Huxtable. Nevermind, of course, that Warrrrshington is only, at most, a mere four-hour car ride from the ‘Burgh. THAT’S ANYBODY CAR DISTANCE! THAT ROAD WASN’T PAVED FOR JAMES HARRISON! [Mondesi's House]
Tags: gratuitous simpsons references, i'm still gay for james harrison even if he is crazy or stupid, quick hit, xmas ape
May 19th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
Um, doesn’t he fly at least a few times every season?
May 19th, 2009 at 3:33 pm
“Listen up, Murdock. James Harrison will face the Chargers when they come to see him. Don’t be sneakin’ up on me with no hypodermic needles.”
“Don’t wolly. Loofies wirr kick in vely soon.”
HARF-HARF!
/cue A-team music
May 19th, 2009 at 3:36 pm
/cue A-team music
And gas up the A-team van, head east from Pittsburgh until you reach D.C.
May 19th, 2009 at 3:37 pm
Everyone had better agree not to tell Harrison that Tony Kornheiser just quit MNF because of a fear of flying. If he finds out it’s just SOME BITCHASS ANYBODY PHOBIA, he’s going to have to come up with a new excuse.
May 19th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
Also I’m challenging James Harrison to a fight in a plane at 35,000 feet. If he doesn’t accept? Pussy. There, I said it.
May 19th, 2009 at 3:39 pm
Ah the A-Team….dare I say the greatest show ever? I dare.
May 19th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
“And gas up the A-team van, head east from Pittsburgh until you reach D.C.”
On the Interstate? THAT’S AN ANYBODY ROAD!
May 19th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
Do they have trains yet in Pittsburgh?
May 19th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
I would absolutely pay real, actual money to see an A-Team movie with Harrison, Ben, Hines and Mike Tomlin and Hannibal… that would be… wow.
May 19th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
I think it’s just popular to have a fear of flying. BANDWAGONER!!!
May 19th, 2009 at 4:12 pm
“And gas up the A-team van, head east from Pittsburgh until you reach D.C.”
I’ve driven I-76 before and I’d rather cope with a fear of flying.
May 19th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
Why does he play for the Steelers then? They’ll play everybody and anybody in the NFL within 4 years.
He should quit now.
May 19th, 2009 at 4:24 pm
Team Captain Murphy
May 19th, 2009 at 4:43 pm
Last time the Steelers won, Joey Porter pulled a Rainman at the airport. “Uh oh! We definitely can’t get on that plane, motherfucker. QANTAS, they’ve definitely never had a crash. Definitely definitely QANTAS, motherfucker! RAAAAAH!!!”
Then Bill Cowher had to drive him to D.C. on back roads in a Buick Roadmaster.
May 19th, 2009 at 5:53 pm
The fact that Harrison is scared of flying doesn’t mean he’s not also retarded.
May 19th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
Maybe James Harrison can find a way to fly without a plane. No one else does that. Well…except birds…ANY FOOL BIRD CAN FLY THESE SKIES?
May 19th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
@ otto man: most confusing double negative ever.
May 19th, 2009 at 6:39 pm
Gimme a break. This has the distinct aroma of face-saving bullshit if I ever smelt it. Clicking on your link, I see the “story” comes from Steelers beat writer Ed Bouchette of the Rooney PR Machine otherwise known as the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. Clearly Dan Rooney didn’t want to offend President Dahkie so he had some bullshit story planted in the local rags because we all know Dan Rooney worships at the altar of the Suntanned Superman.
May 19th, 2009 at 6:42 pm
I would argue that his made up excuse – not going because it’s only for Super Bowl winners – is proof of his less than mental giant status. I heard better excuses from my kids when they were 8 years old.
May 19th, 2009 at 6:49 pm
I hear he also has a fear of fellating.
May 19th, 2009 at 8:19 pm
sweet vindication.
May 19th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
“Ah the A-Team….dare I say the greatest show ever? I dare.”
Loftiest show ever?
May 19th, 2009 at 11:09 pm
Jon Stewart just did a bit on this. Brutal.
May 19th, 2009 at 11:42 pm
Per PFT, here’s what Harrison’s agent said: “I would not want to speak for James,” Parise said. “But I know he’s proud of whoever we elected president.”
So, he’s only proud of Obama because Obama won? And if we had elected John McCain, Harrison would be proud of him?
I love irony.
May 20th, 2009 at 12:23 am
Only reason to travel to DC this time of year is to see the Pens beat up the Caps in front of a semi-friendly crowd…oh yeah, that’s over with.
May 20th, 2009 at 8:52 am
@ Kevin in ABQ: Who are these “Pens” you speak of? And what of these” Caps”? Are these rival street gangs? Mime groups? Alternative theater ensembles? Explain yourself, please.
Also, Harrison is an idiot. He flies every other week, no? Fuck the Stillers.
May 20th, 2009 at 10:24 am
So, where is BDD with the Vick post? The man has been out of prison for HOURS!