In a new twist, Tony Romo collapses down the stretch. Haha, now he’ll have to settle for being a run-of-the-mill one-sport pro athlete who bangs Jessica Simpson and plays golf better than 99.99% of the population. He must wake up every morning wondering if today will be the day that he finally puts himself out of his misery with a well-placed bullet. [Dallas Morning News]
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Scooter’s right…
Was in the grocery store this morning and in teh checkout line noticed Jessica is on the cover of Vanity Fair. Nobody is kicking her out of bed, and no bag needed.
/regretting having too much self respect to wear USC or Cowboys gear to land that.
Wanna know what I do as well as Tony? Win playoff games
@ Scooter Biceps
True, but I would need a paper bag for her face before I started plowing.
There isn’t a man among us who wouldn’t plow Jessica Simpson. Not one of us.
/sighs at role of being voice of reason
I’m not sure if it contributed to his collapse, but Homo listened to Troy Aikman when he told him to apply a generous amount of lube to his club every time he wants to put it in the hole.
Just me or is the GODDAMN STAR looking a bit Daly-esque in that photo?
Honestly, if I woke up every morning next to an elephant seal, I’d want to be out on a golf course as much as possible, too.
But if he tries to shoot himself in December, he’ll end up hitting Shawn Springs or Brian Dawkins.
Instead of considering golf full time, drop Yoko Romo, then move on to banging the next celebrity hottie & keep cashing your Cowboys cheques ya fuckin goof
I had a 57 on the back yesterday, I’m not going to the Open either I guess.
Remember when Jessica Simpson was hot?
DMN commenters were so supportive too I saw.
/pours out Monster energy drink