Sexy Friday: Sweetie Cyanide
04.03.09Over the years, cyanide has caused the death of many people including, notably, Rasputin, Heinrich Himmler and the residents of Jonestown. Today KSK is overdosing on the booty of Sweetie Cyanide (a/k/a Laura Dore). I’m afraid this may indeed be a fatal dose, as rigor mortis has already afflicted the contents of my trousers.
More of after the jump. Warning: if glorious asscrack is not safe for your work– then, baby, this shizz is
[ via RealTalk NY -- who are our Uproxx brothers in much the same way that the Adams College Tri-Lam's are brothers to all the rest of the Tri-Lams ]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/wasteland-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/belichick-sweats-150x150.jpg)
@bnb21 i wondered why THEY werent voted off! lol
You’re welcome.
whoever photoshopped these did the job correctly
no complaints
“what the fuck is up with these white women with black women’s asses”
unless you hung up on Becky and Heather, an ass-to-waist like this should come as no surprise
this one maybe comes from the Denise Richards/Gabby Reese type of family tree, because I doubt any asses like that came over on the Mayflower
anyhow, I ain’t mad at rocco and them. seriously somebody got to love them skinny brawds, and I ain’t the one.
because once you’ve handled 40+ inches of ass it’s hard to enjoy anything less
Works for me.
+1 to JMill.
I’ll add a $20 parlay to that: I’ll bet she has an AFF ad that has bad punctuation and some variant of the phrase “I’m only interested in black men!!!!”
i’ve got a boner.
Too much ass? I don’t think so. That bubble is ripe to be popped!
@ Otto — well, you tried
ROTFLMAO
Call me the crime dog, cuz I wanna take a bite outta crime!
I love a good ass as much as the next guy, but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. That is honestly too much ass. I mean, Kim Kardashian has a HUGE ass, but it’s reasonable enough such that you could go “Yeah, there’s a decent chance I could hit it from behind.”
With that? Unless you’re swiging at the knees, not a chance. And even then, you might just be playing “Just the Tip”
Look at the head/neck on the third picture. Not even fucking close to real. Still doesn’t mean I wouldn’t bang every piece of however many pieces it took to make this girl.
I agree RB’s Pimp….
I’ve lived in L.A., Vegas, TX when I was younger, VA, and Chicago, and everytime I go back and visit Texas, especially Austin, I am surprised at how much ass those white girls have. But as far as this chick in the picture goes….I’d need to be the dude in Any Given Sunday with his dick swinging down to his knees to even have a chance to have butt sex with that ass.
See, if I didn’t live in TX then I’d find that booty implausible. But going through the LSS, I’ve seen plenty of girls where the butt just explodes even though they have normal sizes everywhere else.
It’s a wonderful thing. And that booty is a wonderful thing.
@Rocco: Thanks…Ive been patiently waiting for quite some time !!
@DennyCuse: As soon as I get around to photoshopping a different head on her, I’ll get those nudes posted.
100 bucks says she’s went black and will never go back
You’d probably need a cock the size of Mandingo’s before you can even reach her asshole. That 30 inches of ass gets in the way.
The pic where she’s kneeling in the sand topless looks like her bikini bottom is dripping wet with ass sweat. Ewwwww (read Yummmmmmmmm).
@ Rocco
I cant help but to laugh. Thanks for starting this thread out !!!
(BTW – still waiting on those nudes of the ex that you mentioned !!)
Heartless.
100 bucks says she’s went black and will never go back *unless she went out with Jeff Blake like AJ Feely’s fiancee*
Her real name is Laura Dore. Google her if you want to see her without the touch up. BTW without the touch up work she is still hotter than Rocco’s old lady with the bonus of not needing a paper bag.
I forget… is Ape the black one?
Travis Henry already fucked, impregnated, and skipped out on the child support payments.
How many of you still want her?
/me
/masturbates to the pics and takes drunk ass to bed dreaming about the chick from the best sexy friday ever.
That’s no moon.
Luke, I am your boner.
That ass is the size of the Battlestar Galactica.
She has reached the pinnacle of hottness in her lifetime. A 1-2 year window to rope some sugar daddy in as she plumps and sags. And that is very, very soon.
MC
“Do you know karate?”
“No.”
“Good.”
/puts jock strap over head
Jon Gruden think that ass is 250 pounds of concrete cyanide.
Took a group vote. One vote for real (me) one vote for photoshop (he hasn’t been fucked in over 5 years) and one vote for airbrush.
I would spread that on a biscuit.
I like a big butt in proportion to the body. This photoshopped cyborg lady does not have said proportion.
And instead of making fun of Rocco for his ex-lady (who has a great body and the majority of you/myself would gladly wreck regardless of confirmed butterface status), we should make fun of him for that fucking party hat.
Sorry, I think I agree with Rocco. That girl is seriously photoshopped. It’s like physically impossible for someone to have that body. I think on the picture before the jump the right side of her torso below the boob has been cut out. There are other pics like this http://www.lazygirls.info/Laura_Dore/Whats_Going_On_Back_There__Wd8yQHa where it’s even more noticeable. For some reason, this girl’s “thing” is to photoshop her upper body where it looks unnaturally skinny.
And I thought Rocco’s gf, while not having the prettiest face, had a kickass bod.
You know, as a girl who already has an ass that won’t fit into the same dress size as the rest of her, I can’t even imagine the trouble this woman has buying clothing if she actually looks like this.
/realizes all the other KSKers don’t care if she ever wears clothing.
// did once know a girl in high school with a brutal hips to waist ratio, so I’m willing to believe she’s actually real
That ass won’t be too big for Rocco after I take about four bites out of it.
@Rocco….
Im surprised at you and your comments today. It wasn’t to long ago when I thought you learned a valuable lesson here on the KSK. I guess I was wrong. Im not trying to pile on….its all been said above. Do yourself a favor and dont comment on the ladies anymore – it is a no win situation for you!! You screwed yourself with the first pic you sent in of your ex. No matter what you do from here on out, it will always go back to that pic.
In Rocco’s defense, his Ex has a better body than Hippo Ass.
A less freaky one, anyway
Maybe, maybe not but she definitely has more of a butter face than ass/hips girl.
Those photos have been carved up so badly this post almost warrants a “bad MSPaint” tag
Wow, photoshop much?
A few observations on this Sexy Friday:
1. Some guys are ass men, some are tit men. Me, I think of a woman as a hole.
2. If you’re doing a solo mission to a picture, it doesn’t matter how cartoonishly-Photoshopped she is.
3. I wish Rocco would check in more often.
Oh…my lord. 100% ass man here and damn did you gents deliver. Nothing like some ass to cheer you up when you’re at the office 2 hours late.
Sunny Lane is fantastic too.
Is it Ass Friday? Must be, ‘tween these glorious ho-cakes and Jessica’s “accidental” display in Mexico.
(C’mon…that was such a planned leak to show there’s no cheese on that Whopper…)
Oh sweet, Rocco’s in Walter Sobchek mode today. That’s always fun. But isn’t it Shabbus soon?
All that being said, even Kim Kardashian thinks that’s a horrible airbrush job. Either tha or everything that broad eats goes directly to her ass. But I’d still hit it. Not that that’s saying much.
Ass reference… Sunny Motherfuckin Lane. Check her out via redtube if you haven’t.
JAFO approves of her tush. JAFO loves big butts. I would live on her like reservation… set up camp and explore the lay o’ the land.
/no shit she’s airbrushed/photoshopped whatever. You’d still hit it, stop lying to yourself.
I’m still amazed by that ass. How in the world do the rest of you type about something else? Why am I even reading the comments?
/scrolls back up for the ass
Rocco, those pictures are definitely better, and she does have a smoking body. She’s definitely a butterface though.
Rocco beatdowns are great. He’s like Python’s Black Knight.
In Rocco’s defense, his Ex has a better body than Hippo Ass.
A less freaky one, anyway
Gino, if she does, it was just photoshopped within two degrees of insanity like everything else in those pictures, including the signature.
@Otto: I don’t know, that was just a huge oversight on my part. I guess my eyes never got past the nice tits in the bikini pic. Must have been those great honeymoon memories I remember and not the busted, sun burned face. I still think she was pretty. Whatever fuckers. Enjoy the rest of your Sexy Friday. UM, thanks for the effort.
Very nice. I’m just surprised that a hot chick who gives herself a stupid name like Sweetie Cyanide doesn’t have a tramp stamp. That ass is a Sistine Chapel looking for its Michelangelo.
Oh, and that Rocco exchange was hi-fucking-larious.
I believe Rasputin actually drowned after the attempts to poison, bludgeon, and shoot him failed.
/nerd
ROCCO STFU.
Alright, Rocco, we can agree on one thing — you managed to pick the worst picture of the bunch there.
Seriously, how do you not run with a Batgirl photo?
Something tells me she wore a corset for a very long time.
By “something” Maj means “years of stalking.”
Diablo:
1. Check Brian’s link.
2. Learn how to read.
IT WAS A BAD CHOICE IN PICTURES! I stand by my decision.
Those are some serious birthing hips.
Which, by the way, does factor in to why many of the male species enjoy a woman with ample hips/ass; better to breed with.
Her waist to hip ratio is a little freaky, though.
I’d be sweaty too if I had to carry that ass around.
Looks like some people don’t remember.
http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2009/01/ksk-fantasysex-advice-mailbag-roccos-ex-threesomes-and-the-elusive-quest-for-buttsex.html
I think Rocco prefers pancake face.
If I remember right, Rocco likes butterface.
This went terribly wrong.
/shows self the door
Otto you’ll take your own “taste in women” over some other person’s? Fascinating, please tell me more. Preferably in long, drawn-out paragraphs using butterflies and flowers as metaphors.
GOD DAMN
If she actually looks like that, I’d hit it hard. However, I won’t believe that those proportions are real unless I see her in real life.
/Can anybody arrange for a brutha to see her in real life?
Flub that is a great post. I love a woman with rodeo handles. I would enjoy motorboating between those cheeks.
Big butts FTW.
I will go down swinging if I have to! And no, I don’t prefer pancake butt, or pancake face. A nice, small, firm bubble butt will do. Think Reef Girl.
her butt is too small
I don’t think its so much the ass as it is the waist/hips ratio.
That said, she’s a thumbs-up.
“STFU if you prefer pancake butt.”
I think Rocco prefers pancake face.
Thanks for the concern Otto, but I’ll take my “taste in women” over that any day.
/Still doesn’t understand the fascination. She’s hot from the waist up though.
Rocco, I’m just trying to protect you here. You’re leading with your chin.
Goddammit. Seriously, shouldn’t Adobe revoke someone’s Photoshop license for that? That’s an atrocity. I have no idea what the model really looks like, but I’m assuming she actually has human proportions, and not… whatever the hell that is.
Rocco, it’s not a “huge ass thing” it’s a “I wanna bang this chick cuz she’s hot thing.” STFU if you prefer pancake butt.
Is there such thing as ass-botox?