Welcome to the final KSK Mock Draft before the actual 2009 NFL Draft. For this week’s installment we’ll be drafting party scenes from film that we would like to have attended. There are no real rules for this draft, although the party you select has to be an actual party with guests other than yourself and some naked chick (oh, and no porn).
Once a party from a particular film has been drafted all other parties from that film are off the board. The order is as follows.
1. Punte
2. Ape
3. Drew
4. Unsilent
5. Ufford
6. Flubby
It should be noted that Random.com’s list randomizing feature hates Flubby for some reason. It’s probably a Kentucky fan. Continue after the jump for the results, then play along in the comments.
1. Punte- Toga party from Animal House
Obligatory.
2. Ape- Boogie Nights New Year’s Party
If you can get over William H. Macy shooting his wife and himself, which I can, seems like a good time. Plus, the movie turns really depressing after this, so I know I got in at the right time.
That’s already two off of my list right off the bat. This should be a contentious draft.
3. Drew- The Moon Tower Party from Dazed And Confused
“There’s a new fiesta in the making as we speak.”
Until my graduation week, I don’t think I ever got to go to a big high school party in an open field where people got drunk and smoked up and all that shit. I so, so, so badly wish that had been a regular part of my youth.
4. The “Save the Pit” party from PCU
Tonight at the Pit, Everyone Gets Laid.
Ufford: The Ice Storm swingers party. RAWR! Kidding. I’ll have something soon. Sorry, I’m fighting a hangover this morning.
Punte: Uff drafts the volleyball scene in Top Gun.
5. Ufford- Old School
Can’t say I’m enamored with this pick. I was really looking for something with more drugs and strippers and gambling.
Hey, Snoop played, hot high school chicks showed up, and there were whippets. You could do worse.
6. Flubby- Caddy Day at the Bushwood CC
Tough call as there are a few good party scenes in Caddyshack (dinner party, yacht christening, post-match celebration).
This will certainly be the shortest lived party drafted today.
7. Flubby- Connie and Carlo’s wedding reception in The Godfather
Awesome spread, live band, plus Clemenza gets drunk and makes a fool of himself– then I’d get to hit up Vito Corleone for a favor and he has to say yes.
Damn, I really wanted the wedding party so I could ask Vito to whack somebody. Excellent value pick.
8. Ufford- Samuel L. Jackson’s blues performance in Black Snake Moan
Hot, sweaty bar in the sticks with Christina Ricci and sexy black chicks getting down to motherfuckin’ SAM JACKSON.
9. Unsilent- The Halloween Party from How High
Sure there would be plenty of Harvard douchebags, but there were plenty of hot chicks and Cypress Hill performed in a fucking dorm. Bonus points if I can get my hands on some of their OG Kush.
10. Drew- The orgy from Eyes Wide Shut
Drew would just stand in the corner touching himself.
11. Ape- The player’s party from Any Given Sunday
Drugs, strippers, pro football players in Miami with Lawrence Taylor chainsawing a car in half .
Ufford: Dammit. THAT’S the kind of party I was looking for. Stupid brain.
12. Punte- The Playboy Mansion party in Beverly Hills Cop II
13. Punte- The Ewok party at the end of Return of the Jedi
There’s a plushies joke in here somewhere, I’m sure.
14. Ape- Bruce Wayne’s fundraiser in The Dark Knight
Have to hobnob with high society types for a while, but food will be good and the booze top notch. And the pay-off, of course, is that I get to watch Batman fight The Joker.
15. Drew- End of the world party, Rules of Attraction
Sex, drugs, hot coeds in lingerie. Fucking Colby College.
16. Unsilent- Tony Lacey’s party in Annie Hall
At this point in the draft Ufford attempts to select the orgy from Eyes Wide Shut that Drew already drafted implicitly.
Ufford: Oh. You mean the time where you just attached an image and DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING? Yeah, that’s my fault.
I hate it when Mommy and Daddy fight!
17. Ufford- Rudd and Rogen’s trip to Vegas from Knocked Up
Strippers and Cirque du Soleil on mushrooms.
I don’t think Rudd and Rogen’s trip qualifies as a party. Unless the guests were the chairs. But we’ll let this one slide, because it’s always a party with shrooms.
18. Flubby- The rave scene from Matrix Reloaded
Crappy movie and the scene ran too long– but looks like a real hootenanny.
Now it’s up to you to fill out the list in the comments. Please select one scene at a time and wait ten picks before selecting again. Nobody likes an asshole. And remember, starting next week the mock drafts will all be commenter driven. Knock yourselves out.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/lol-gonna-miss-you-nfl-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/scrooge-150x150.gif)
The subway station men’s bathroom stall party from The Basketball Diarie.
The subway station men’s bathroom stall party from The Basketball Diaries…
Why is everybody looking at me like that?
Disco party fight in The Last Dragon.
Was that Evil Santa Clause?
The 3 AM lounge piano scene from “Pretty Woman”.
party in face off before the feds come in. mass cocaine. barbituates that make you slanted and gina gershon in her prime. then a bad ass shoot out with automatic weapons top notch night
Library smoking weed party from The Breakfast Club. Both of the chicks are smoking hot, even though competing with Emilio might be a bitch. But as a consolation prize the weed they’re smoking allows you to scream loud enough to break a glass door so thats gotta count for something.
Billy Madison’s third grade graduation party. “Ohh what a glorious day!”
Wow, a H.O.T.s reference! That takes me back to the days of Cinemax’s Friday After Dark when they’d show soft core porn from the ’70s. Usually it was poorly-dubbed European stuff like “Emanuelle”, but “H.O.T.S.” and topless girls football is pretty good, too.
eddie murphy’s party at dan akroyd’s house in “Trading Places”.
The party that Mozart, his sleazebag promoter, and a random selection of 18th century actress/whores had in the middle of nowhere in “Amadeus.” I don’t even speak German, but I love absinthe and syphilis. This would also be a great place for a slew of “Magic Flute” pickup lines. Well, probably the only place.
The party at the beginning of “Friday Night Lights”. With beer funnels, nice Texas girls, and a packed-out house, what’s not to like?
Great Willie Aames’ ghost, a H. O. T. S. reference.
Take that, Lingerie Bowl!
Man, there ain’t crap left, so I’m going with the Pagan Party in the movie Dragnet.
/aware of his lameness
WF
I’ll take the party scene from Not Another team movie. It’s the same as Can’t hardly wait party, but replace Jennifer Love Chewitt with Lacey Chabert, more drugs and a nude Spanish exchange student.
If you had showtime or cinemax after 1980, this movie was on a loop every saturday night @ 2AM
H.O.T.S.
The pool party drained me everytime.
PLUS YOU GET BONUS BONADUCE!!!
Undrafted Free Agent Hall of Fame Selection.
Goodfellas just to watch Tommy DeVito fuck with people.
Titanic – nothing like impending doom to release your inhibitions.
a) Night Shift– the bachelor party in the morgue.
b) Can we switch to the small screen? The Wire: either the welcome home Avon party at Orlando’s, or the “welcome back to the game, Cuddy” party where Slim Charles says “oh it’s ON now…”
The wedding reception in Rachel getting married. I’d like to crash the party, break their instruments and kick all of their hippie faggot asses as retaliation for my getting dragged to the theater to see that bullshit.
“Yo Yo Yo I thought this was a party???”
“LET”S DAAAAAAAAAANNNNNCE!!!!!!!!”
/Footloose FTW
//Feverybody cut everybody cut….
the donkey show in clerks II. on second hand, maybe not :)
Lost in Translation karaoke party with Scarlett Johansson and Bill Murray. Pretty sure I win.
I’D BUY THAT FOR A DOLLAR!!
Clarence Boddicker’s party from robocop. Cocaine, 80s hookers, Red from that 1970s show, it’s got everything. Bitches leave, indeed.
House party scene in Swordfish. Fine booze and random chicks stripping off their clothes and getting in the swimming pool.
/best I can think of for being so late
House party from SLC Punk. Beer imported from Wyoming, punk rock chicks, tons of weed and LSD and a rocking soundtrack.
Too bad it’s in Utah.
The backyard party from Boyz in the Hood. I love me some barbecue.
idiot I am..Beach Girls was the movie
saw an oldie but a goodie this weekend and so I will select the party at Uncle Carl’s with Ducky(who in later years had legs and she knew how to use them) and Ginger. Whole movie was one long party….
Wow, I said to myself on seeing Kid ‘n Play again that was a pretty good movie when it came out, particularly for a white guy. I’m sure it sucks now. I’ve seen everything else listed and “eh” except never seen Black Snake Moan and I’m leaving my chair, in the usual Friday drunk, to go rent that. Your fault , I’m DWI, you’ll be hearing form my laywer.
rick moranis’ apartment party in ghostbusters
And since I’m so damn late I’ll double-dip by hanging out with Frank Booth, Jeffrey Bomont, Ben, a utility light, and a case of Heineken.
Wow, someone else actually saw Strange Days. And here I thought it was just me.
@Tracer Bullet: all that and Gibby Haynes too, IIRC.
Funny, I don’t remember Clemenza getting smashed at the wedding party. But I do remember Pentangeli getting smashed at Anthony’s Lake Tahoe christening party at the beginning of Godfather II, and since I don’t see it off the board yet I’ll take it, and some wine please.
Speaking of The Players Ball,
How about the original from The Mack? You get to hang out with Richard Prior, drink a ton, and have ton of easy women choose you “Yo bitch chose me!”
or the titular “Players Ball with Ice Cube? Also good times.
The “party” scene in Clockwork Orange, where Alex and his friends go to the Korova Milk Bar where the woman sings Beethoven’s 9th. I really want to try synthemesc and drencrom, also that singer looked like an easy slut.
/enjoys wallowing in own insignificance and slow decay.
Real Genius is the greatest house party ever, but since it was mentioned I am going to say the party in Clueless where the Mighty Mighty Bosstones played. Throw in beer and Alicia Silverstone in a mini skirt and that’s a good night.
The Enchantment Under the Sea dance from Back to the Future. That’s all I can think of….I guess I’d get to see Calvin Klein perform.
“I could use a party with some figure skaters” from Bull Durham…
The party from the “dick in the mashed potatoes” joke.
any party at the Double Deuce before Dalton ruined it
@j4b: You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.
Very, very slow work day for me and nobody’s looking, so I’ll pick again:
I’d like to go out to the bars after a game with the Charlestown Chiefs in “Slap Shot”. It was the swingin’ ’70s- the era before AIDS and Reagan when all the girls were on the Pill and there were plenty of recreational drugs for everyone. You’d get to hang with Paul Newman, Moe the pervert and some wacky French Canadians, then watch the Hanson Brothers get in a fight before you take a lady home and learn, post-coitally, of her attraction to women.
“Hanrahan! Suzanne sucks pussy!”
I quit then.
/takes ball and goes home
//kicks soda can lying in street
I expected this to be a shallow draft, but apparently I just don’t watch the right kind of movie. I’m going to have to go with the party the Soviets throw after the battle of the tractor factory in Enemy at the Gates.
Plentiful vodka, accordion music, and a super-horny Rachel Weisz? And the guaranteed opportunity to shoot Nazis the next day? Fuck and yes.
@BTBD: “Does Band of Brothers count as a movie? If so, I’ll take the liberation of Eindhoven. Legal drugs, great beer, and hundreds of likely-fatherless women recently freed from oppression? Yes please.”
Good pick, lofty pick.
@ jackin’4beats: Ouch, strike two.
The Players’ Ball in “Dr. Detroit” is an excellent pick which totally slipped my mind. Any party with James Brown and prostitutes is one worth crashing.
The Vanilla Ice concert in Secret of the Ooze is like the Dark Knight party on acid
@JJTB: my bad, I’m an idiot for not CTRL F’ing for that 2nd pick.
OK, I’ll now take (as my 2nd pick): The party in the movie “House Party.” I win. How the hell did no one take that obvious one? CTRL F’d that one. Unless it is the blank white image at the top of my screen because I can’t see videos at work.
@Rocco- Children of various ages get drunk and/or high, then someone undresses and fucks a passed out Chloe Sevigny without her even waking up… good times had by all!!
/can’t believe I didn’t think of this one.
//still satisfied with my choice of the bar party in The Accused.
The high school house party from Uncle Buck.
Quality pick. You can also beat the hell out of a hipster named Bug and hit golf balls at him- after you’ve let him out of your trunk.
For this late in the draft – how about the Player’s Ball in Doctor Detroit (yes I’m old – very old).
The house party that Jake Mizursky crashes in Alpha Dog… just so I could watch Jewish Bruce Lee live and in person.
Never saw Kids. What’s up with the party?
Sid Vicious and Nancy’s final hurrah.
The high school house party from Uncle Buck. The girls at that high school seemed like they were down for business, plus I might get to steal John Candy’s hat.
The pending party once Sexy Friday is posted. STOP SLACKING!
Jackin, I can understand not wanting to read through all the comments but to make the same pick as one of the authors in the actual post? For shame
The party at the end of Kids.
/sorry
The jell-o wrestling party from Old School. It was so great it killed Blue.
The bar party at Titty Twister in From Dusk till Dawn.
Good pick. “From Dusk Til Dawn” had the makings of a really good movie until that vampire bullshit went down. Also, don’t forget that Fred “The Hammer” Williamson, Danny Trejo and Tom Sevini appeared, too.
Does the pool scene in Fast Times qualify? If so, it’s the steal of the draft.
Doesn’t anybody fucking knock anymore?
It’s All Gone Pete Tong. Ibiza!
That orgy scene from 300 where the Ephialtes gives Xerxes the 411 on the secret path around the Greeks. That looks like fun.
Wyatt and Gary’s get cool party in Weird Science high school nudity, drinking, etc.
The bar party at Titty Twister in From Dusk till Dawn. I don’t care if she’d turn into a vampire and eat me, I’d still enjoy staring at Salma Hayek and the other strippers and drinking with George Clooney and Quentin Tarantino. Not to mention Cheech Marin, Harvey Keitel and a barely legal Julliette Lewis. And they sell every kind of pussy imaginable for a bargain basement price.
STEAL OF THE DRAFT!
The party Max throws at the speak easy behind Fat Moe’s Restaurant when Noodles gets out of jail in “Once Upon A Time in America”
booze, gambling and slutty 1920′s flapper chicks. Count me in.
when they killed those strippers in Stag. Did I just date myself?
I hereby Select, with my first pick, the club party in Soul Plane. Because of my particular wont for African-American and Latina women.
I’ll take the Childlike Empress’ Pan-Fantasian conference at the Ivory Tower in “The Never Ending Story”. Sure eveverbody’s worried about The Nothing, but I’ll just swoop in, call the Emperess Moonchild and presto-changeo, everything’s cool. There’ll be all kinds of crazy creatures and I’ll bet the food, drink and drugs would be wild. Hell, I’ll invite Bastian and get him laid. But hands off the emperess! She’s mine!
Playboy Mansion party from Beverly Hills Cop 2. Just so I could slap the one black guy for dancing like a gay top…then try to tap some 80′s playmate poon.
Graduation party from Menace II Society.
King&Occidental @ The Pier from Fear.
I just wanna see a 20 year old Reese Witherspoon in a lil’ skirt for realsies. Bonus Alyssa Milano as a skank (natch), too.
Fuck, Otto, you’re right. I was so hung up on using peasants for precussion instruments I overlooked the castle full of maidens aged 16-19 who enjoy oral sex and getting spanked.
“I’ll bet you’re gay!”
“No I’m not!”
If we’re getting ole’ timey here (with respect to Gino & Otto), I’ll take the victory party from Excalibur. The details elude me (I think it’s where Arthur first sees Guenevere), but bonus points for it also being the same movie that I first saw boobs.
/thumbs up to my friend’s dad for letting two 9-year olds watch it
//no idea why Uther kept the armor on while banging
@ Otto “Naughty Zoot. Bad, EVIL Zoot. I deserve a spanking. We ALL deserve spankings. And then…the oral sex!”
I’ll take the party at Camelot in Monty Python’s “Holy Grail”.
Right movie, wrong castle. I’ll take the one Galahad finds, with Zoot, Dingo and the rest of the ladies.