Ah St. Patrick’s Day, the one day a year when you’re supposed to get hammered before convincing gullible news crews in the deep south that you’ve located a mythical leprechaun hiding in a tree. I may not fully understand your gentile holidays, but I certainly enjoy them. While we here at KSK have no official plans for this festival of drunkenness it’s a safe bet that we’ll all be drinking Jamesons and/or Guinness at some point this evening afternoon morning…

/passes out
//hits head on keyboard
///jkjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmnjhmn

[1 hour later]

Anyway, while you’re getting ready for the fun take a look at how your favorite NFL personalities will be carrying on today.

Tommy from Quincy- Wearing his new SACK MY CAWK, I’M A WICKED FAHKIN’ MIC! t-shirt.

Kerry Collins- “I’m not going to drink. I’m not going to drink. I’m not going to drink. Ah fuck it, give me one of them shiftless black beers.”

Ben Roethlisberger- PEW PEW PUKE

Jerry Jones- Goes fuckin’ crazier than usual!

Ryan Fitzpatrick- Reads Ulysses.

Kate Mara- Packs heat.

Let’s all thank Stephen Hunter for writing the book that eventually led to this scene being filmed. Here’s a bonus shot.

Matt Leinart- Breaks out the limited edition green beer bong to impress two ginger girls he met while they were ditching sixth period.

Eli Manning- Takes a special bath with Moishe and a bar of Irish Spring soap.

Tom Brady- Dresses Giselle’s dogs in matching kelly green Dolce & Gabbana numbers.

John Carney- Walks around enveloped in the distinct stench of cabbage.

Todd Haley- “What, you think I celebrate that fucking Paddy holiday? I’M FROM ENGLISH STOCK, YOU KNOW-NOTHING ASSHOLE!”

J.T. O’Sullivan- Rids the Colonies of the Protestant Scourge.

Tom Coughlin- Gets all red in the face from screaming at a barmaid.

Deuce McAllister- Wonders why everybody thinks he’s Irish.