Nasty Fetish Tournament Second Round — Orson Swindle Regional No. 2 vs. No. 10
In an obviously misguided attempt at mocking the playoff structure of the NCAA tournament, we’re inviting readers to enjoy matchups of actual fetishes in a voter-powered tournament, culminating in April with the Nasty Fetish Final Four. That tournament continues today with Round One action. Remember, you’re voting for what you consider the more nasty fetish.
2. Fecophilia
Literal Meaning: Taking a walk on the brown side.
MySpace says: Experimental/Lounge/Death Metal band out of Huntington Station.
Notable Advocates: Osi Umenyiora, Chazz Palmintieri, Mo Rocca
10. Chikan
Literal Meaning: “The Japanese term used to refer to frotteurism, , or men who commit such acts (the term for women who commit such acts is chijo). Crowded trains are the most common target of chikan and chijo, and as part of the effort to combat the problem, some railway companies designate women-only passenger cars during rush hours.”
Orson says: Like frottage, but with more of an emphasis on groping. And being in the subway. Also it’s Japanese, so a tentacle probably slips in somewhere.
Notable Advocates: William H. Macy, David Gregory, David Alan Grier
Tags: Nasty Fetish Final Four
March 24th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
If you keep putting that picture up with it fecophilia is gonna be an exceptionally strong #2 seed.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
that fecophilia picture is one of the most disgusting things I have ever had the misfortune of seeing….
March 24th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
No upset here. That shit is just disturbing.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
augh is that real jesus christ i have to destroy my work computer and my eyeballs now thanks for nothing
March 24th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Thanks for putting fecophilia up around lunch time.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:18 pm
AND WHO THE FUCK IS VOTING FOR CHIKAN???
You sick bastards!
/shakes fist until exhausted
March 24th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Gonna lose my lunch. Thanks.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
@ Ropethower: You obvioulsy haven’t seen 2 girls 1 cup. Google it in a safe place (ie a computer in which no one will ever know you were on there and no one could ever see you watching it) and on an empty stomach. Oh, almost forgot. Take your pants off before you click play, you’ve only got about 3.2 seconds of good jack material there.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:21 pm
I also notice a sphincter tightening reaction during many of these options.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:22 pm
@ J4B: You sure have been doing a lot of fist shaking lately. Sorry about the bloodside thing yesterday. Does this mean we can still be internet blog commentor friends that don’t know each other?
March 24th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
What hell will the first seed be?! Yikes. I almost voted for the japaneese thing, just to not see that photo again!
March 24th, 2009 at 1:31 pm
I’m with Danish. Holy Christ is that disturbing.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
I helped vote Chikan into this round. And I feel it deserves better than what its getting.
But that picture… omg. Its too powerful. Vote for Feco
March 24th, 2009 at 1:43 pm
And the rout is on.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
That feco picture is going to be my facebook picture.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:49 pm
I can’t look.
March 24th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
@dAndy: I feel like the old man in the room, hence the fist shaking, even though it’s directed more to the weirdos who actually like fecofelia. That really grinds my gears.
Oh and no worries about the bloodslide comment, I was just pleased that my comments are being read and that doggone it, people actually like me. Don’t forget to mail my $0.18 money order using a $0.42 stamp. THANKS!
/so does fecofelia win in a shit storm?
//OK, going back to work now
March 24th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Ooh a $0.42 stamp. I think it would be better for me to spend like $5 on a Western Union transfer so you can get the money quicker. Let’s see all I need from you is:
Copy of Driver’s License
Bank routing number and account number
Your Mother’s maiden name
Favorite pet as a child
The street you grew up on
That should do it. I’ll have the $ to you in no time once I get the info. Also, YOU HAVE WON THE BRITISH LOTTERY!!! WITH YOUR INFO I WILL GLADLY AND PROMPTLY SEND YOU YOUR SHARE OF THE 8,647,420 POUNDS!
March 24th, 2009 at 2:07 pm
What a blowout!
March 24th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
that shit – literally, shit – doesn’t disgust me. i’m worried that there’s something wrong with me. i have a tougher time watching a goat tumble down a mountain than watch a chick eat shit. I have seen videos of girls eating shit directly as it’s coming out of the other girl and it didn’t phase me one bit. it didn’t turn me on either, but i really don’t understand why it doesn’t bother me as much as it does most normal people.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:13 pm
I bet Chikan feels like my Ags going up against UCONN Saturday
March 24th, 2009 at 2:17 pm
@lil’ wayne: all these web videos are really just a means for the U.S. Government to determine who has the psychological disposition necessary to tear a detainee’s balls off his body and wave them in front of the detainee’s face without throwing up or crying himself. Congratulations, soldier. Print out this comment thread and get to your nearest recruiting center.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
trying to make sense of it…
at least the people eating dookie are mutually consenting
whereas the chikan fetishist probably requires an unsuspecting, unwilling target
so maybe that’s nastier. I mean, the only people who are exposed to fecophilia are the nasty bastards dumb enough to click on anything involving any number of girls and cups
violating commuters is rude, reprehensible, and criminal
but…
NAAAAHHH
it can’t possibly be nastier that eating shit
March 24th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
/just had a plate of refried beans topped with cheddar for lunch
ummm-yum-yum-yum
March 24th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
@phil ken sebben
that’s one of my points. i’m completely fine watching girls eat shit – it doesn’t phase me at all, yet I can’t watch someone inflict pain to themselves or to others. that’s what i don’t understand about myself, but i think that’s something for a therapist to look into, not the ksk commenters
March 24th, 2009 at 2:37 pm
I did not need to see that picture right before lunch. And sure, groping on the subway isn’t exactly cool, and the whole tentacle possibility is there, but there is a reason that fecophilia is the #2 seed.
I have a feeling it’ll be a #1 vs. #2 matchup at the very end, where no one really wins.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:41 pm
Poor lil thing, looks like she just tripped and fell into a mud puddle. What a nice guy that is helping her up and feeding her some warm soup…
/reads
//vomits
///removes and eats own eyes
March 24th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
i have a tougher time watching a goat tumble down a mountain than watch a chick eat shit.
Wow. Really? I think goats are stupid, so watching them tumble helplessly down a cliff is entertaining.
March 24th, 2009 at 2:46 pm
Arizona alone is carrying on Chikan…
Arizona must like eating shit…
March 24th, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Why no car for men looking to participate in a little chijo? Anything to spice up that dreary commute.
Also, am I the only one who gets a bolt of fear when the Orson Swindle Regional comes up?
March 24th, 2009 at 2:55 pm
When’s the fetish crap gonna be over with? It’s grossing my shit out. Now I can’t visit this site for the rest of the day, because, man, that picture is just wrong. Can’t have it on my monitor anymore, for my own peace of mind.
Also, it’s “faze” – to drive away or frighten
“phase” – a particular appearance or state in a regularly recurring cycle of change
March 24th, 2009 at 3:01 pm
@ lil wayne – Ususally, our reactions of disgust are brought about by feelings of empathy. We see someone eating shit and consequently think of our selves eating shit which, in turn, makes us sick. So if my theory holds up, then you must be a goat. I knew there were goat commenters here!
March 24th, 2009 at 3:10 pm
@ lil wayne
It’s probably wrong to admit this, especially in this crowd, but I agree. The shit eating is weird, but, you know, whatever. It’s the Kill Kill Kill videos that makes me feel a lot worse. That sad look on the goats’ face as they look up? Breaks my heart. Seeing a girl eating shit out of a bowl like it’s chili shit carne? Doesn’t phase me.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:38 pm
Fecophilia is the grossest shit I’ve seen.
Damn you Japan!
March 24th, 2009 at 3:53 pm
Fuck. I’m never eating chili again. Especially chili with poop.
March 24th, 2009 at 3:55 pm
JakesAE, Look out! Slash might scold you for the misuse of ‘phase’ after she went to the trouble to drop knowledge.
Fecophilia defines nasty! And I thought thats what we’re trying to do here.
I have been on crowded trains in Japan and often checked my orifaces at stops too ensure no little Nihongo were lodged. Hey just trying to keep ‘em from missing their exit!
March 24th, 2009 at 3:57 pm
maybe ‘orifices’. Proofreadonkeyboy!
March 24th, 2009 at 4:00 pm
Also Nihonjin NOT ‘Nihongo’.
FUCK!
March 24th, 2009 at 4:02 pm
spanky, i also misspelled orifices a while back on KSK. that’s how you know this blog is messed up. 2 people commenting about orifices in the span of a couple of days
March 24th, 2009 at 4:10 pm
And Kissing Suzy Kolber just sat back and enjoyed what it created. A complete and total barforama.
March 24th, 2009 at 4:29 pm
Sage, I use orifices whenever posible…wait that don’t sound right.
Great ref Gooch. +many pies!
March 24th, 2009 at 6:34 pm
That is so foul, I voted for it, but jesus christ!
March 25th, 2009 at 8:08 am
That is so foul, I voted for it, but jesus christ!
BTW I love your blog!
March 25th, 2009 at 9:15 am
YOU’VE SEEN IT
YOU CAN’T UNSEE IT
March 25th, 2009 at 12:37 pm
Girl on the right looks familiar.
March 25th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
there is a text floating around showing a chick stuffing an entire octopus in her vagina. it makes me want calamari with brown sauce!
March 26th, 2009 at 6:14 am
As an Australia-based Giants fan, I found your blog on google and read a few of your other Giants posts.
I just added you to my Google News Reader. Keep up the good work. Look forward to reading more from you in the future.