In an obviously misguided attempt at mocking the playoff structure of the NCAA tournament, we’re inviting readers to enjoy matchups of actual fetishes in a voter-powered tournament, culminating in April with the Nasty Fetish Final Four. That tournament continues today with Round One action. Remember, you’re voting for what you consider the more nasty fetish.
1. Necrobestiality
Literal Meaning: “When a gentleman engages in sexual congress with a corpse of a departed animal friend.”
The Intarwebs say: Okay if you got $5,000 and legal fees.
Notable Advocates: Jerry Glanville, Asher Roth, Walter Mosley
8. Emetophilia
Literal Meaning: “A sexual fetish in which an individual is aroused by vomiting or observing others vomit. When emetophiles put emetophilia into practice by actually vomiting, especially on a partner, it is called a Roman shower, after the commonly-supposed (but mistaken) belief in the frequent induction of vomiting at Roman feasts.”
The Intarwebs say: Asian girls will do it on video! [NSFW]
Notable Advocates: Kevin Connolly, Naomi Klein, Justin Gage
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Happy Valentine’s Day!
we’re not there yet, but I don’t see necrobestiality taking the whole thing
shit, depending upon your timing or the skill of your taxidermist,
a dead animal may still have a warm, moist vagina
any pussy’s good pussy
@ Phocion, that was exactly what I was thinking. When I puke, it’s like a full body affair. She’s just like, oh, hmm, blerrrghhh. like it’s just as easy as swallowing, but the other way around.
And yes, I clicked the link. Nothing can be as disgusting as the bowl o’ shit girl, IMO
I have yet to click on a link yet. But as each second passes my cursor gets closer and closer…
QLJ,
And the creepiest part was the she was completely calm, like it was no big deal…yes, I vomit gallons that couldn’t possibly fit in my body all the time. That has to be taken into consideration. But, I am scared to click on the link to necro-shamu. Therefore, dead whale ftw
Good lord, I must have a link clicking fetish because I honestly could not help it. After the centipenis ordeal earlier one would think that I would stop. I thought she was wearing an Alice band (thanks wiki!) in that video until I saw a close-up at the end.
/for those of you going to hell with me don’t worry, I’ll already be there checking ID’s at the door
This is the Duke/Kentucky at the Spectrum of Nasty Fetish Final Four matchups.
@Butters i know youd think id learned, but nooooooooo.
QLJ,
Really? You just HAD to click the link? Have you learned nothing over the last week?
Number 1 seed rules. I’m thinking NecroBestiality is gonna take home the prize.
All forms of bestiality should really be tossed out for violating NCAA standards. These fetishes are clearly professional.
And who the fuck is voting for vomiting? Yes, it’s gross. It would beat out many opponents. But… Dead animals?
HOW COME SHE WON’T STOP THROWING UP JESUS CHRIST GODALMIGHTY HOLYSHIT!
Wait, wait, wait. Is Zombie Fido still warm and maybe twitching? Maybe just brain dead? I figure you’re good to go until the maggots show up.
Justin Gage does sound like he’s into that sick shit. +1 for fucking dead whales. Christ.
I love how Emetophilia is only leading the polls in Arkansas. Makes you wonder…
@KD: I guess there’s a lot of porn that’s for guys who get off on chicks gagging and almost throwing up. ALMOST.
But yeah, fucking a dead animal is the #1 seed for a very good reason.
This tourney is starting to remind me of the Bataan Death March. i’m just hoping to survive with my psyche in one piece. We need a good song to serve as an anthem.
I’ve been pickin’ the worst fetishes
all the livelong day
Dead whale fuckin is disgusting
keep my job I may
it doesn’t come close to Fecephelia
if you do that, please don’t stay
It’s not often that I do not have a comment and usually nothing bothers me, but the links that have been provided throughout this tournament have even caught me off guard. I’m sure the people who cruise past my desk think differently of me know. My level of self-respect non-withstanding of course.
I had this page up when one of my employees walked up behind me just now. Yes. Knowing that their boss is looking at pictures of a guy fucking a dead whale is going to do wonders for their level of respect for me.
Whale fucker up there is one sick bastard, but what do we say about the jerkoff that’s taking the picture?
“Brah, let me get a photo of you bangin’ that beached whale. That would be totally frickin sweet! Now let’s score some blah, brah!”
Is there anything Asian girls WON’T do on video?
I can’t wait until the NFL comes back.
seconded.
At least the guy who was making sweet, sweet love to the dead deer dragged the corpse into the woods. What’s the whale guy going to do? Drag 10 tons of blubber behind a sand dune? Did he start this fetish by banging a chick on a beach covered with dead jellyfish? Ape, are you sure Necrobestiality is a fetish and not a disease?
I can’t wait until the NFL comes back.
@futuremrs
I’ve always wondered about those books. I knew my grandma couldn’t be strummin’ the banjo to them, but what do sexually able women do? Read them and then…have a milkshake?
On-topic:
Ever had a girl gag on your dick while giving you head and you thought she might throw up? Didn’t your erection come down just a little? Necrobestiality ftw.
No clue where you found the whale picture, but it’s good to know I haven’t been to that part of the internet yet.
Vomit fetish is extremely nasty – but there’s a reason boning dead animals is a #1 seed. Its rolling over the competition like UConn…but will accusations of recruiting violations threaten to derail the deadanimalfucker juggernaut?(deadanimalfuckernaut?)
Next bracket could be phobias. I have developed a deep fear of the links in these posts. ‘Clickaphobia?’
You know how in trashy, bodice-ripper-type romance novels (with names like “Wings of Passion” and “In the Valley of Lust,” not that I’d know anything about such books since I am an educated young woman with discerning literary taste FUCK YOU OK SHUT UP) the heroine always winds up getting nailed on a bearskin rug in front of a roaring fire somewhere? I really feel like that’s the first step on the road to necrobestiality. You’re fucking on top of a dead animal, fer chrissake. It’s a slippery slope!
are we talking all the way dead, or only mostly dead?
By the time we get to the Elite Eight I’ll be voting like Hellen Keller.
these are getting more and more difficult by the day. the elite eight is going to take one hell of a lot of thought
I want to know who is going to vote for Emetophilia. Sick fukkers.