Nasty Fetish Tournament Regional Semifinal — Orson Swindle Regional No. 2 vs. No. 3
In an obviously misguided attempt at mocking the playoff structure of the NCAA tournament, we’re inviting readers to enjoy matchups of actual fetishes in a voter-powered tournament, culminating in April with the Nasty Fetish Final Four. That tournament continues today with Regional Semifinal action. Remember, you’re voting for what you consider the more nasty fetish.
2. Fecophilia
Literal Meaning: Taking a walk on the brown side.
Wiki says: If You, Me and Everyone We Know is any reflection of reality, people like to poop back and forth, sometimes with the same poop.
Notable Advocates: Rod Smith, Todd Glass, Seymour Hersh
3. Apotemnophilia
Literal Meaning: “The erotic interest in being or looking like an amputee. When experienced very strongly, some people with apotemnophilia come to feel discontented with their bodies and want to actually remove an otherwise healthy limb, a condition called Body Integrity Identity Disorder. Some apotemnophiles seek surgeons to perform an amputation or purposefully injure a limb in order to force emergency medical amputation.”
Wiki says: “Medical experts have reported cases of amputation obsession since the 1860s, said Richard Bruno, a New Jersey psychophysiologist who specializes in brain-body disorders and is one of the few people in the world who have extensively studied apotemnophilia. No one knows how many people are obsessed with amputation. However, there are Web sites devoted to the subject. One is named after the Venus de Milo statue.”
Notable Advocates: Frances McDormand, Steve Hutchison, Craig Ferguson
Tags: Nasty Fetish Final Four
March 31st, 2009 at 12:44 pm
this is a very tough pick, poop is icky, amputee sex is weird, I chose the crap myself, that picture makes me doubt a just god.
March 31st, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Once you hack you never go back.
March 31st, 2009 at 12:51 pm
I’d give my left arm to never see that dooodooo face photo again
March 31st, 2009 at 12:51 pm
Posting this stuff during lunch is no coincidence.
March 31st, 2009 at 12:53 pm
do your worst, I’m still having Mexican for lunch
March 31st, 2009 at 1:04 pm
im tempted to vote incest just to avoid seeing another doodoo picture.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:08 pm
You are really saving the worst photos for last, aren’t you.
Gonna go scrub my eyes with Lysol now, BRB.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:08 pm
Somebody needed to put an apple in that guts severed hand.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:17 pm
You guys aren’t fooling anybody. I know every one of you sick fuckers watched he 2 Girls 1 Cup video and laughed and laughed. So don’t act all moral and outraged and disgusted by a little poopy face photo.
Unless you’re saying it’s highly erotic to watch two women find carnal bliss with their feces but it’s gross for a man to enjoy a similar pleasure. In that case, you really need to do something about that sexism.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:24 pm
How is Osi Umenyiora not listed as an advocate of fecophilia?
March 31st, 2009 at 1:26 pm
Had to vote for the amputee fetish. That pic of “Man Shit Face” totally made my decision for me. For the love of God, please do not put that pic on KSK again.
(FTR – was going to read the Giselle/Bridget scenario again for my pleasure, but that pic above wont allow me to)
March 31st, 2009 at 1:39 pm
Having sex with someone missing an arm or something, not a big deal. The forced amputation part swings the vote for me.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:49 pm
I just keep telling myself that guy’s face is covered with mud. Denial is a good thing.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:53 pm
The guy in the picture on the right totally took last week’s draft to the next level.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:54 pm
@Swig: yeah, me too… you can always take a long, long, long, long shower….. but hacking off an arm is kind of permanent.
March 31st, 2009 at 1:55 pm
Looks like feco is winning this matchup boys.
And don’t you ever, ever, ever, ever, ever post the photo of shitty face ever again.
/hurls out of office window
March 31st, 2009 at 2:05 pm
Enough with the f***in’ poop already.
March 31st, 2009 at 2:16 pm
The 2 most disgusting pictures evah! NO ONE DENIES THIS!
March 31st, 2009 at 2:23 pm
I would have expected Gene Hackman to be a Apotemnophilia proponent
March 31st, 2009 at 2:29 pm
Sheriff, you deserve a face full of shit for that one…
March 31st, 2009 at 2:32 pm
I will vote for ANYTHING to stop the shit pictures. Just, please, make it stop.
March 31st, 2009 at 2:35 pm
NIGHTMARE FUEL!
March 31st, 2009 at 2:39 pm
Tools->Options->Content->Load Images Automatically->
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March 31st, 2009 at 2:40 pm
with that picture, shit eating makes a run at stoma fucking… jsut saying this tourny could get more interesting with the change in the shit eaters unis
March 31st, 2009 at 2:52 pm
This was a triple OT barn-burner.
March 31st, 2009 at 3:04 pm
I can’t believe how many people write into the sex column begging for advice on how to get anal, yet fecophilia continues to storm through the tournament.
/wait, that’s where doodoo comes from?
March 31st, 2009 at 3:17 pm
I’ve gotten shit on my finger a few times when whiping my ass and washed the living shit out of my hands (see what I did there?) trying to get the smell off. I could only imagine the showering/scrubbing/bleaching that fucktard had to do to get that stank off his face.
March 31st, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Hey, kid, the Santorum is a necessary evil. An unfortunate side-effect. I can tolerate a little caca; if the chick is begging for anal, odds are her reaction to one up the bum is well worth the washing.
that don’t make me a fecal freak
big difference.
March 31st, 2009 at 4:02 pm
CHRIST ON A CRACKER is that a very hairy Steve Guttenburg?
March 31st, 2009 at 5:07 pm
MIIS
two things:
A: Fuck you for making you look again!
ii: are you sure that’s hair?
and
2: yeah, it do kinda look like him. and here I thought his movie career was over. huh. just switched genres
the man may now be topping Tom Sizemore and Paris Hilton on the list of celebs whose home videos I DO NOT WANT
March 31st, 2009 at 5:08 pm
*making me look
fucker
March 31st, 2009 at 5:12 pm
Then by all means, Whorfin, chop off your arm and fist your girl with it next time she begs for it. But beware, you’ll never be able to wash the santorum off that phantom limb of yours.
March 31st, 2009 at 5:24 pm
you know that would help solve a host of geometrical problems
I’m sure you’ve had that moment when your arm just isn’t quite long enough
you can’t quite get your finger to where it needs to be
at least not without interrupting something you dare not interrupt
let’s say your in your car
or at the movies
wouldn’t it be convenient if you could just grab your left arm with your right, pop it off, and give her a proper thumbs up?
March 31st, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Please tell me that poop pic is fake. Dear God… please.
As for the vote, shit, the amputee thing is just too fucking weird to be gross. Like the whole “I get off on eating people” thing. I lived in Amsterdam for 30 years, and have basically heard about every fucking disturbed thing you can imagine. I’ve never heard anyone say they get off on a chick with one leg, or (worse), a chick with two legs until dinner, at which point she gets turned into a chick with one leg.
I have, however, heard a girl ask my buddy if he was into being shit upon. At which point he dry heaved. (Surprisingly, she wasn’t into vomit sex.)
March 31st, 2009 at 6:15 pm
know every one of you sick fuckers watched he 2 Girls 1 Cup video and laughed and laughed.
I didn’t laugh, but I did analyze that thing over and over again, trying to determine if it was real or fake. My final conclusion was that it was fake, and they’re actually chewing/swapping Mocha ice cream.
March 31st, 2009 at 6:19 pm
I can’t believe how many people write into the sex column begging for advice on how to get anal, yet fecophilia continues to storm through the tournament.
Goddammit, stop ruining my fucking fantasies by injecting reality into them!!!! When you have anal with a girl, there is never any poop involved! Drew said so!
March 31st, 2009 at 10:36 pm
This was a tough one for me.
Apotemnophilia is fucked up and deranged.
Fecophilia is just plain nasty.
So in the spirit of the tournament (-NASTY- Fetish), I had to vote Fecophilia.
April 1st, 2009 at 12:03 am
That picture’s freakin’ hilarious.
April 1st, 2009 at 12:11 am
I really did not need to see that picture. I have never dry heaved at a damn picture before!!
And my guy friend wonders why I’m so opposed to tossing his salad.