Coming Soon to an NFL Blog Near You…

Stay tuned…

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32 Responses to “Coming Soon to an NFL Blog Near You…”

  1. Cliffdogg Says:

    Is that doo-doo?

  2. Big Daddy Drew Says:

    From the legendary director of, “FUCK, BRIAN RUSSELL IS A PIECE OF SHIT!”

  3. Spilly Says:

    NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS

    Starring Wade Phillips as “Giant Squid”

  4. Coach Gordon Bombay Says:

    “A Color-Commentator died here tonight…”

  5. Otto Man Says:

    Let’s see….

    Roger Goodell as Ozymandias
    Bill Belicheck as Rorschach
    Brett Farve as Nite Owl and Aaron Rodgers as Nite Owl II
    Gisele Bundchen as Silk Spectre
    Eli Manning as Dr. Manhattan
    Philip Rivers as the Comedian

  6. TF88 Says:

    Glad to see someone though the Gaphic Novel was better. I haven’t been this confused about a movie since…….ever

  7. Captain Caveman Says:

    Otto: oh-for-seven. I considered Rog for Ozymandias, but it didn’t quite fit with the theme I chose.

  8. Coach Gordon Bombay Says:

    I’m curious to see who best fits the role of the cynical, drunken murderer/rapist?

  9. Otto Man Says:

    Yeah, I wasn’t really happy with any of those. As long as I’m already batting .000, let’s spin again with a QB-centric crew.

    Tom Brady as Ozymandias
    the birthmarked Drew Brees as Rorschach
    Archie Manning as Nite Owl and Peyton Manning as Nite Owl II
    Jessica Simpson as Silk Spectre
    Tony Romo as Dr. Manhattan
    Kerry Collins as the Comedian

  10. porky1 Says:

    Romo as Nite Owl
    Pacman as Rorschach
    Ocho Cinco as Ozymandias
    Peezy as The Comedian
    Ben as Dr. Pittsburgh
    Jessica as Silk Spectre II
    Marmalard as President Laserface

    This won’t be the cast, it’s just what I’d like to see. Especially Ochomandias’s explanation of his master plan, Pacschach’s Journal entries, Peezy reacting to getting his face sliced in Vietnam (”Bitch…you done gone cut my face! THAT’S DISRESPECT!”) and Dr. Pittsburgh’s scientific theories about Choco Tacos.

  11. porky1 Says:

    Jerry Jones actually kind of looks like Moloch, so he can be in it too…

  12. baba oje Says:

    Used the old NFL logo – I’m not buying this garbage!

  13. Nite_Owl Says:

    Possible Homosexual. Must investigate further.

  14. Chin-Strap Says:

    “But they tell me ‘Roooger, Roooooger, you got blood on your hands! Well…I also have gold records on my wall.’”

  15. Rob in WI Says:

    Fuck… I’m actually almost excited by this.

    CC, agree the GN was better, but are you going to have the squid, or are you parodying the movie (or “other” of course)

  16. Nite_Owl Says:

    Please tell me some sort of KSK Watchmen parody is in the works! BDD can be nite owl, if he loses weight.

  17. Otto Man Says:

    Please tell me some sort of KSK Watchmen parody is in the works! BDD can be nite owl, if he loses weight.

    Shit, I didn’t even think of that approach.

    Drew as Nite Owl
    Ufford as Ozymandias
    Punte as the Comedian
    Maj as Mothman
    Ape as Rorschach
    Flubby as Dr. Manhattan
    Footsteps Falco as Dollar Bill

    Flubby as Rorschach

  18. Otto Man Says:

    Whoops, ignore the second Flubby.

    It was hard trying to decide which one member of the gay mafia was the misanthropic psychopath. I considered going with an all-Rorschach lineup, but something about Ape made him the winner. As it were.

  19. Dan From Chicago Says:

    Will there be dick jokes? I was told that there would be dick jokes.

  20. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    I never read much “Watchmen”, but Alan Moore is cool and DC Comics has a WAY better track record in the movies than Marvel. Having said that, I’m eagerly anticipating a Hollywood version of this classic Marvel title:

    http://www.spiderfan.org/comics/images/nfl_superpro/001.jpg

    I might still have the copy of “Super Pro” #1 I bought as a kid in 1991. If my parents let me into their house again, I could find it and then sell it for almost as much as the cover price. I mean, it says “Collector’s Item!” right there on the cover.

  21. pemulis Says:

    Someone’s pickin’ off costumed homos…

  22. OrgLaborAgInNOLA Says:

    Using “whatever” in a tag gives the false impression that this post is making fun of Cutlerfucker, and that’s false advertising.

  23. makeit snow Says:

    I got Kerry Collins as Rorschach.

  24. Hakim Drops the Ball Says:

    At Gino Tourettsa: Damn right it’s a collector’s item! It’s got Captain America in it, right? Or was it Spider-Man? Ah, fuck, one of those two.

    As for the Watchmen tie-in, I’ll go with an all coaches route:

    Rorschach — Herm Edwards (”Herm,” indeed, coach. “Herm,” indeed.)
    Ozymandias — Belichick (special guest appearance by Big Ben as Bubastis.)
    Dr. Manhattan — Whoever’s got a huge schlong and willing to paint it blue. Uh, Mike Tomlin?
    Comedian — Bill Parcells (”Jap plays!” That’s stire furry, light?)
    Nite Owl II — Tony Dungy
    Nite Owl I — Dick Vermeil
    Silk Spectre II — Suzy Kolber
    Silk Spectre I — Andrea Kramer

  25. Stokes Says:

    FUCK, don’t tell me this is the issue where BDD kills flubby for accidentally realizing that Drew seeks to unite deadspin and fanhouse against the ulterior motives of the world wide leader (aka Nixon) against T.O.

    wait, this shit’s all fake?

    fuuuuuuuuck

  26. PirateSloth Says:

    I don’t get it.

  27. PirateSloth Says:

    Nerds

  28. Spatula Says:

    “Coming.” I get it, HARF, HARF.

    /dick joke?

  29. bk Says:

    i’m with piratesloth on this one.

  30. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    Someone killed Ape? NOOO!

  31. Upstate Underdog Says:

    get a room fan boys.

  32. jackin'4beats Says:

    Buckwheat’s been shot…AGAIN?!?!?!

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