Maker’s Mark, purveyors of fine bourbon, recently announced that they will have Boomer Esiason’s face on a set of special-edition bottles commemorating next month’s Land’s End Stakes at Turfway Park (hint: it’s a horse race). What other NFL players past and present can we expect to see on bottles of our favorite distilled spirits and other adult beverages?
More after the jump…
[ The Money Times ]
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Arrogant Bastard Ale = T.O.
Ben Rothlesberger = Milk shake with a Pall Mall floating in it
Um, this is Brady Quinn’s obvious beer of choice: Magic Hat #9
* picture credits
copyright may apply
Percentile
48
overall
A Fruit Beer brewed by
Magic Hat Brewing Company
Mo Clarett— Grey Goose
Chris Henry on Mike Hard Lemonade.
im on kyles killer lemonade
/pissed someone beat me to the smith and cooper joke
Kerry Collins on a bottle of Blackhouse.
/sometimes the jokes just write themselves.
rongrastname – van gogh chocolate vodka
Seriously guys…not a single god damn mention of me? This site sucks.
Jared Allen – Fighting Cock Bourbon
Heinz Ward – Yellow Tail
Adrian Peterson – Communion wine
Eugene Robinson – Hoegaarden
Jeff Reed – Red Bull or whatever spikey-haired assholes are drinking now
Also, Tony Gonzalez isn’t Mexican or even Hispanic, but I don’t know what kind of booze they make in Cape Verde.
Matt Leinart-Strawberry Hill
Mike Vick-Mad Dog 20/20
Korey Stringer-Sparks Energy drink
Brittfar-mason jar of moonshine
The fact that there isn’t a Beaker joke in there somewhere is a shame.
Sips from sippy cup!
Rex Grossman – Clipper City’s Loose Cannon
http://www.ccbeer.com/files/ccbeerfiles/Loose-Cannon-301_0.jpg
Brady Quinn – SKYY Raspberry
Jeff Garcia and Knob Creek – it’s almost too easy
Mike Vanderjagt- Canadian Mist
Brian Russel on a bottle of homebrewed, unlabeled, shitty moonshine.
Rogue Dead Guy Ale- Marquis Cooper and Corey Smith
too early?
Pat Tillman – Rogue Dead Guy Ale
I can see Pey-Pey on a Moosehead bottle…and it’s making me laugh.
This could be a good photoshop contest on Fark. I’ll submit it.
+1 tech 9
Matt Leinart Apple Pucker
Peyton Manning – Moosehead
Orton. Jack Daniels. Easy.
On a bottle of Jameson – WELLLLLKKKKAHHHH!
huh, lot more oenophiles than I would have expected on this site.
DT Sam Adams on a bottle of Sam Adams. oh, these are supposed to be funny? my mistake
Jeff Garcia–Schmitt’s Gay
PK’s image replaces the Van Gogh paintng on that Espresso flavored vodka.
Andy Reid on Fat Tire.
Maybe they can make a tequila that has a tiny knife in the bottom instead of a worm. Perfect for Ray Lewis.
/horrible stabby joke
Rich Karlis – Barefoot
Is there any Choco Taco falvored booze?
Also, I’m surprised you didn’t go with the obvious Hines Ward Saki.
Check that, here’s Al’s wine
http://www.winerx.com/sku6009099.html?utm_source=Google%20Products&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Vampire%20Merlot
Matt Jones’ Jaeger Bombs! Cocaine in a Can, Baby!
Al Davis – Evil
http://winelabels.wordpress.com/2009/01/07/an-evil-wine-label/
Sambucca – Sabatino Carmine Piscitelli from Tampa
I’m pretty sure he is Italian
The combination of bourbon, horse racing, and Boomer Esiason is so white I might implode just from thinking about the sheer whiteness of it.
Peter King goes right onto the Zima bottle I’d think. We have a local microbrew called ‘Pine Baron Ale’, perfect for Brett.
Already dreading the Rogue Dead Guy Ale jokes. Unless they’re about Marquise Hill. Amiright, PK?
Kerry Collins- Delirium Tremens. Which also reads like the Titans’ IR list.
Ricky would have to be Toasted Head
http://winelabel.wordpress.com/2009/01/16/wine-label-design-toasted-head/
I heard they’re putting Ricky Williams on bottles of Baker’s.
Arrogant Bastard Ale – Joe Buck