[Driving outside Sony Picture headquarters in Culver City]

Film Exec: And that’s why the casting director thought you’d be perfect fit for the role.

Marshawn Lynch: I go BEEF MOE on big screen? Get paid scrilla for it?

Film Exec: That’s the idea.

Second film exec: If this works out, we could find a spot for you in our upcoming Don’t Wake Daddy feature.

Agent: Isn’t that claymation?

Second film exec: Yeah, but we need voice actors.

Agent: How about actual voice actors?

[Both laugh]

Second film exec: Yeah, sure. Sal Simmowitz on the poster. Maybe we can do a bio of him for the Blu-Ray.

[Two swap baggies of coke]

Film exec: See, we’ve done live action Muppets movies, but no one has ever done live action Muppets with actors as Muppets.

Second film exec: And you, of course, would be ideal for Animal. Just a wonderful match there. And a perfect springboard for you, by the way.

Marshawn: Anne Maul solid for BEEF MOE. Get them drums? PPPFFFFOOOOOOO Stupid on them drums, boi.

Film exec: We were thinking Rowlf, but the race thing might have made it hot button.

Second film exec: We got Angelina Jolie doing her Mighty Heart brownface thing.

Agent: Much better that way.

Marshawn: Get in character. [Bangs on steering wheel with fists] NATNATNATNATNATNATNATNATNATNAT

Film exec: Easy, easy. You got loads of time to practice this stuff. Principal photography isn’t for months.

Marshawn: [Pulls out gun] NATNATNATNATNATNATNATNAT

Second film exec: Who gave him the prop gun?

[Fire shots in the air]

Marshawn: BEEF MOE LEVEL TWO! NEXT LEVEL BEEF MOE! NATNATNATNATNATNATNATNAT

[Sirens blare]

Film exec: Aw shit. Stay cool, stay cool. We got this covered.

[Car pulls over with Marshawn still banging on the steering wheel. Cop approaches driver's side window]

Cop: All right gentlemen. Let’s have it.

[Each exec hands one baggie of coke to the cop. The cop remains impatiently with hand extended toward Marshawn.]

Cop: Ahem.

Film Exec: C’mon Marshawn. Hand one over.

[Cop clears throat. Marshawn continues banging on wheel.]

Marshawn: Ain’t got that powder for you, boy. Traded dat joint for extra Maple Butter Blondie at Applebees. Dessert too damn solid there, boy. Give me that leg kick.

Cop: That’s it. I’m taking him in.