Far be it from me to mock anyone’s irrational beliefs, I have plenty of my own. But this video of Kurt Warner drawing God made me feel a little awkward on his behalf. But then, who am I to question whatever it is that makes Kurt’s mojo work? After all, if Carolina is foolish enough to get drawn into a shootout Saturday night, Warner is a game away from going back to the Super Bowl.
While Warner’s gridiron bona fides are above reproach, his drawing is short of divine. First of all, he starts out drawing God, but then he says he is really drawing Jesus. C’mon dude, pick one! I conducted a Kwick KSK straw-poll to determine who Warner’s drawing really looks like. Here are the responses I got:
• Chuck Manson
• Osama’s pubes
• Creepy Jesus
• Davendra Banhart
Conclusion: As far as artists go, Warner makes for a good rapidly-aging quarterback. Our good friend LSUfreek has another idea about the source of Warner’s greatness:
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/12/rexryanmistletoes-150x150.gif)
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2010/12/metrodomecollapseksk-150x150.gif)
I like to imagine Him as a mischievous little badger.
Needs more Purple.
I figure God would have consummate V’s for angry eyebrows and teeth, fire coming out of his mouth, and stronger biceps.
i don’t know how to react to the fact that ksk knows about devendra barnhart.
That’s one of the guys in the Black Keys, I’m pretty sure.
That’s fucking Chuck Norris, my friend.
Chuck Norris is God.
Not sure what God looks like, but LSU Freek is definitive proof that He wants us to laugh.
Raptor Jesus is the best Jesus, though Plastic Jesus is pretty nice too.
Save me, Jeebus!
Apparently Kurt doesn’t know about Raptor Jesus.
I’m sorry, but everyone knows that Morgan Freeman is GOD. I mean really, a white guy with long red hair? Pffft. Don’t any of you watch movies an’ stuff?
Wait, is Kurt giving the Holy Spirit short shrift here? That’s the drawing of his I want to see.
Also, I shouldn’t have been drinking water when he said, “Obviously, Jesus is younger than God.”
That is the worst looking picture of Purple Jesus I have ever seen. He’s not even fumbling in that picture.
@CR: I don’t think Otto Man is implying a damn thing
Or was it Benny Hinn?
DC Talk gave him that shirt for Christmas.
It’s not just the shirt, it’s the way he wears the shirt.
Looks like Beyonce with booty shorts on.
A very awesome God.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FjpuMWQRXAM
@Slash
So, you’re saying that our God is an awesome God?
“You might remember my other artwork, including the popular ‘Mike sucks dick’ from restaurant bathroom stalls”
@Otto – Also Tony Dungy really really hates Kurt Warner…
@Otto Man: are you implying he might be one of those homosexuals I’ve heard so much about?
As I said, make your own conclusions.
But to paraphrase Jack Donaghy, that shirt is definitely bi-curious.
What a terrible drawing. David Koresh looked nothing like that!
It also looks like Chris Robinson, lead singer of the Black Crowes. So basically, our lord and savior looks like a rock star. That’s what makes him better than anyone else’s lord(s) and savior(s).
Looks just like Ted Nugent. Yeah, that’s about right. Of course Jesus looks like Ted Nugent.
I do agree that the shirt is highly suspect, but his wife probably bought it for him, he has to wear it. So he’s whipped. Which may be just a step above gay. You all can be the judge of that.
@Otto Man: are you implying he might be one of those homosexuals I’ve heard so much about?
Wait until he draws his picture of Muhammad…
The falcon about to suck a dick and saying ‘Nom, nom, nom’ is truly the highlight of my Monday.
No really, draw God however you want, but that shirt is fucking sacreligious.
“Shit! I drew the guy from Kings of Leon AGAIN!”
/crumples up paper
That’s not Jesus, that’s every white bum that’s ever asked me for spare change.
More importantly, what’s going on with that shirt? pink with black polka dots? really??
Let’s review the evidence.
Agressively public expressions of Christianity. Older mannish hag of a wife. Flamboyant fashion choices. All-male working environment. Free time spent doodling pictures of his dreamy fantasy men.
Make your own conclusions, people.
But what would God look like if Matt Lienart drew him?
Brenda made him wear that shirt. God does not approve of flamboyence, though.
i love that shirt.
I drew Clapton too!
his nose isnt jewy enough.
More importantly, what’s going on with that shirt? pink with black polka dots? really??
If it weren’t skinny, I’d say it was Andy Reid.
I’d like to think Warner always falls asleep to the sound of his own screams.
That’s not Jesus, that’s Clapton!
You mean to tell me Kurt Warner thinks Jesus had a beard and wore long, flowing clothing? Where would he get such an idea???
I. am. afraid.
That’s pre-op Brenda, folks.
“You heard God, Super Best Friends! We’ve got to make a giant stone John Wilkes Booth!”
I guess Kurt wants to be a pirate, with that shirt.
All your guesses are wrong. That’s fucking Chuck Norris, my friend.