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Birds of Gay: Emo Eagle vs. Emo Cardinal. WHO YA GOT?

Emotions run high in the postseason. Emotions also cascade down the cheeks of the losers in the form of warm, salty failure. These are felt no more keenly than by these sensitive souls. Sure, they try to tell themselves their teams have exceeded expectations and that they are therefore immune to crestfalling after a title game defeat. Because they’ll need your emotional support, WHO YA GOT?

Contestants

Emo Eagles______________________________Will Leitch

Team

The Fierce Rune Blade That is the Philadelphia Eagles______The Buzzsaw That is the Arizona Cardinals

Song They Want Collective Soul to Play at Halftime

“Shine”___________________________“The World I Know”

Recent title from favorite baseball team so you don’t have to feel bad for him

Last October______________________2006

Top 2008 Emo Vampire Movie: Twilight or Let the Right One In?

Twilight!________________________Did Woody Allen direct one?

Injury That Follows Loss

Razor blade to the wrist__________________________Cookie sheet to face

Celebration After Win

Tears of fathomable joy________________________Indoctrinating all the new Cardinals fans

Finishing move

Not yet buying into recent good fortune_________________Brushing up on naked Antonio Pierce

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This entry was posted on Friday, January 16th, 2009 at 8:30 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

24 Responses to “Birds of Gay: Emo Eagle vs. Emo Cardinal. WHO YA GOT?”

  1. LaFavre's Next Retirement Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 8:44 am

    Are we picking the most gay here? Because Will wins hands down, if that’s the case.

  2. Boatdrinks Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 8:49 am

    Oh god, I always wonder how a pic like that exists. I am with LaFavre. Gay gay gay gay.

  3. Animal Mother Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:14 am

    I thought it was gay to enjoy the “warm, salty failure” of another man?

    I just like it when McNabb vomits in the clutch and that homeless guy he calls coach pulls out a fork to get the chunks.

  4. senor mullet Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:20 am

    so leitch and his twin brother are rooting for opposite teams in the game?

  5. Otto Man Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:38 am

    I think Leitch was aiming for “Blue Steel,” but ended up with “Amber Alert.”

  6. Upstate Underdog Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:42 am

    At least Leitch will his anchor in the fireplace to comfort him if the Cards lose.

    http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2007/06/ksk-birthday-message-will-leitch.html

  7. Canada Dry Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:51 am

    What an ominous way to start sexy Friday.

  8. Ryno Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 9:56 am

    Jesus I hate these hipsters.
    1 scarf is enough – it’s a functional device, not a fashion statement people!

  9. Reggie Bush's Pimp Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:06 am

    Always thought Leitch would be more into “Run” than “The World I Know.”

  10. Warthog Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:10 am

    Cardinals last world series was 2006, but Arizona’s last series title was 2001.

    /now fucking off. Seriously.

  11. jackin'4beats Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:10 am

    I’m pulling for the Buzzsaw because, you know, those Eagles can scarf down a salty load for all I care.

  12. Christmas Ape Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:14 am

    Warthog:

    Yes, but Leitch isn’t a Diamondbacks fans.

  13. Slash Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:46 am

    That picture of the Emo Eagles always cracks my shit up.

  14. Kid Presentable Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 10:50 am

    No Emo Eagles fan will want to hear Collective Soul. They’ll just hit mute and put on the latest Les Savy Fav vinyl.

  15. Two Napkin Tommy Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 11:14 am

    Leitch looks like Ian Curtis . . . only gayer.

  16. Phony Gwynn Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 11:24 am

    I bet a Woody Allen vampire movie would have the line “I decided to go for the jugular, so I asked her if we could have sex while I watched the Knicks game.”

  17. Kid Presentable Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 11:51 am

    Has anyone else seen the Dawkins/Wolverine segment on Sportscenter? It’s equal parts insane, hilarious and awesome. Fly Emo Eagles Fly.

  18. Slideshow Bob Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 12:06 pm

    +1 Phony Gwynn

  19. Nate Newton's van Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 1:13 pm

    I think the fag(s) take this one.

  20. Flacco Solo Brow Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 1:25 pm

    I just spit green tea all over my fucking computer after I read “Song they want Collective Soul to pay at half time” and then looked back at the picture of the Emo Eagles and Leitch and then heard the songs in my head…. it was all too much but well played.

  21. Gino Tourettsa Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 1:59 pm

    @ Otto Man

    “I think Leitch was aiming for “Blue Steel”, but ended up with “Amber Alert”.

    Spot on and well played, sir. Think Chris Hansen and the Dateline NBC crew took that picture of Leitch?

  22. Pubic Enemy Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 3:02 pm

    Leitch is a Cardinals fan? What a cocksucker.

  23. dick_gozinia Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 3:39 pm

    If Seth Green was cast in the movie Super Troopers, his character would look exactly like the red headed Emo Eagle guy.

  24. Pubic Enemy Says:
    January 16th, 2009 at 4:48 pm

    @Pubic Enemy:

    Clarify that you meant the St. Louis Cardinals, dick.

    /holds no ill wil towards the Buzzsaw

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