Batmalard vs. The Clown Plince of Clime. WHO YA GOT?
Jokel: You just could no ret me go, courd you? This is what happens when unstoppable folce meet immovaberr object. You tlury incorruptiberr? You no kirr me out of mispraced sense of serf-lighteousness, and I no kirr you, because you is supell funtime. I think you and I all destined to do this follever.
Batmalard: You’ll be in a padded cell forever. A CELL PADDED WITH THE INNARDS OF LASERFACE VICTIMS! WHAT? HUH? WHAT? FUCK YOU!
Jokel: Maybe we sharl padded cerr. We doubre up the late this city’s inhabitants rosing they-ll minds.
Batmalard: I can’t understand what you’re saying Charlie Chan the wide receiver. Maybe if you could go and get fucked in American, like we speak in this country, people would respect you better.
Tell my groin it’s going to be okay. Lie! Like I did!
The night is darkest just before I limp off the field nursing an injury I could play through. And I promise you, the limping is coming.
You thought we could be decent running backs with an indecent ability. But you were wrong. The world is cruel, and my diminutive backup is the clear superior. No matter how much lean meat protein I take in.
James Norvon Jr.: Why’s Batmalard running, coach?
Lt. James Norvon: Because James Harrison has to chase him.
James Norvon Jr.: He didn’t do anything wrong.
Lt. James Norvon: Because he’s the hero the NFL deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So Silverback will hunt him. Because he can take it. And because he can float the ball out of bounds or spike it at running backs’ feet. Because he’s not our hero. He’s a brash, shit-talking guardian, a watchful protector. A douche knight.
Tags: dan v. photoshops, fanboygasm, had to find a use for ufford's images or he'd knife me, in this one the joker survives for multiple sequels, Ufford Photoshops, who ya got?, yeah i like the movie what of it?
January 9th, 2009 at 8:28 am
And. Here. We…………..Go.
January 9th, 2009 at 8:29 am
Wow, that got weird quick. Any chance of a Jokel-Yokel combo?
January 9th, 2009 at 8:29 am
Oh. My. God.
January 9th, 2009 at 8:31 am
Just…genius. Bravo, sir.
January 9th, 2009 at 8:32 am
I would have gone with Tomlinson as the Maggie Gyllenhaal character and Merriman as Two-Face, but this is just nit picking.
January 9th, 2009 at 8:36 am
brilliant
/applauds
January 9th, 2009 at 8:36 am
headsortailheadsortailheadsortailheadsortail
Mr. Freeze approves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bTpbM3-vsI4
January 9th, 2009 at 8:49 am
That movie kicked all kinds of ass, but the best part?
Deebo, the Convict Who Taught Us How to Love.
January 9th, 2009 at 8:54 am
That Reebok logo on Turner’s trench coat is maybe the greatest piece of photshopping I have ever witnessed. The whole post is great, but that logo killed me. Kudos.
January 9th, 2009 at 9:08 am
Otto Man, I think Deebo broke the fourth wall cause that other eye was looking straight into the camera, I thought he was giving a Zack Morris like soliloquy.
January 9th, 2009 at 9:10 am
Douche Knight. Classic.
January 9th, 2009 at 9:22 am
I took that as an homage to Stuart Scott, qwijibo.
January 9th, 2009 at 9:34 am
“You want me to terr you how I got these scals?”
January 9th, 2009 at 9:47 am
Near O’Donnerr as Lobin?
January 9th, 2009 at 9:52 am
As your photoshop skills improve, these posts get weirder and weirder.
Who do I need to talk to to sign you guys up for a professional course?
January 9th, 2009 at 9:58 am
Is Tiny Jesus under Lt. Norvel’s trench coat?
January 9th, 2009 at 10:01 am
Darren is attached to a cup at the moment
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rjvt6xqKwV8
January 9th, 2009 at 10:04 am
soon ritter dallen hele wont have a nicker fol his glandma
January 9th, 2009 at 10:06 am
Stands up. Applauds.
So…would the Douche Knight’s Batcave doors fly open?
And could we turn Jay Cutler into a mobster or something. He needs to be in this.
January 9th, 2009 at 10:15 am
Do I rook rike guy wiff pran?
January 9th, 2009 at 10:22 am
So does Hines O.D. on Ripped Fuel after this?
January 9th, 2009 at 10:23 am
James Norvon Jr.: Why’s Batmalard running, coach?
Lt. James Norvon: Because James Harrison has to chase him.
Absolutely fucking brilliant.
January 9th, 2009 at 10:24 am
(Batphone rings)
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?
January 9th, 2009 at 10:26 am
Can you make a spotlight leave a douche sillhoute in the sky?
Not sure what it would look like, but it would sure be awesome!
January 9th, 2009 at 10:28 am
Thank you Ape for starting my day off right..
January 9th, 2009 at 10:33 am
But filst, a magic tick. I’m goirring to make Antonyone Clawmarty’s knees disappeal.
January 9th, 2009 at 10:37 am
+1 Drew
January 9th, 2009 at 10:48 am
The Douche Knight? I don’t get it.
January 9th, 2009 at 10:56 am
“Thank you, Batmalard, for stopping this mugger! Now the streets are safe – wait, you didn’t give me back my wallet! HEY!”
January 9th, 2009 at 11:02 am
/stands up
//slow clap
January 9th, 2009 at 11:11 am
@bam33: Why so selious? Ret’s put a smirre on that face
January 9th, 2009 at 11:13 am
bam33 is a man of his wold.
And that word is bitching about every post without ever making a funny comment.
January 9th, 2009 at 11:19 am
Between this and today’s Tawmmy post, this has got to be one of the finer days I’ve ever seen on this blog.
January 9th, 2009 at 11:29 am
“WHAT? HUH? WHAT? FUCK YOU!”
This is fucking brilliant, I never get tired of it. I imagine him saying it in the huddle during games.
January 9th, 2009 at 11:32 am
Tiny Darren’s face on a Batarang?
The night is darkest just before I limp off the field nursing an injury I could play through
If by “play” you mean hobble around like his leg just got run over by the batmobile.
January 9th, 2009 at 11:41 am
Why so selious? Ret’s put a smirre on that face
What about this face?
January 9th, 2009 at 11:45 am
I am in awe. Just in awe. Brilliant.
January 9th, 2009 at 11:57 am
@j4b: is it just me or does that picture remind you of the fatass fake Batman in hockey pads who the Joker sends crashing into the Mayor’s window?
January 9th, 2009 at 12:12 pm
Can this win some sort of special Oscar, and Hines accepts…..I wourd rike to thank my tarented cast alound me….
January 9th, 2009 at 12:21 pm
STANDING FUCKING OVATION!!!
January 9th, 2009 at 12:34 pm
See, this is how clazy Batmalmarald’s made NFL! If you want oldel in NFL, Batmalmarald must take off his mask and reave prayoffs. Oh, and evely week he doesn’t, rinebackels wirr be brindsided, stalting tonight. I’m a man of my wold.
January 9th, 2009 at 12:41 pm
thanks for the quality writing that has been amiss that last few weeks.
January 9th, 2009 at 12:44 pm
thanks for quality comment, except you don’t seem to know what amiss means.
January 9th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
all i know is it’s sexy friday so amiss or two should be around soon
January 9th, 2009 at 1:03 pm
for some reason Norv Turner is comedy gold to me, commisioner Norvon is great but im still partial to Sir Norval.
January 9th, 2009 at 1:06 pm
Can Tebow play Batmalard’s annoyingly pious sidekick?
January 9th, 2009 at 1:07 pm
wow. just wow.
all of you guys are on fire this year — another outstanding post
/not calling you “flaming”
January 9th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
You folks are on fire (sorry, file) today.
Bawston and Stiller fan friends (solly, flenz) alerted.
Worrell crass liting, faw shah.
January 9th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
You just could
Oh Hines…
January 9th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
The coin in the Twomlinson Face picture… subtle but a very nice touch.
January 9th, 2009 at 1:55 pm
@miamidiesel: exactly.
January 9th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
I love the first comment made. So fitting.
January 9th, 2009 at 3:35 pm
Lt. James Norvon: We have to save LaToeInjury! I have to save LaToeInjury!
January 9th, 2009 at 4:33 pm
oh my science, that oldman-norv picture is absolutely fantastic!
January 9th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
Hines. In dutchface. So . . . wrong. Yet so . . .fuck it, its still wrong. Funny as hell, but wrong. Don’t stop.
January 9th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
Marvelous. Simply marvelous.