Jeff George Memorial Least Of The Week, Week 17: Forgot to award this last week (it would have been DeSean Jackson, I assure you), but there’s no doubt who the biggest piece of cock jerky in the NFL was in Week 17, and for time eternal. It fucking Brittfar, who cost his team a playoff spot, cost his coach his job, announced to ESPN that he’d need a few weeks to make up his mind on retirement (and ESPN actually considered this news), and generally acted like the old preening media slut he always has been. FUCK YOU BRETT FAVRE. I LITERALLY HATE YOUR GUTS. I HATE YOUR SPLEEN, YOUR PANCREAS, AND YOUR GALL BLADDER. I HOPE YOU GET KIDNEY STONES THE SIZE OF FUCKING GIBRALTAR. DIE. (Honorable mention to wideout Roy Williams, who played on an 0-16 team and shortarmed everything for Dallas during their collapse. If Roy Williams were to drown in pig blood, I would not be sad. Muhammad Ali could run more precise routes.)
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- CATS CHILLIN’ TO THESE WEEKEND LINKS
- JAPANESE COUGH DROP COMMERCIAL FTW
- NBC UNCANCELS ‘TRAUMA’
- ZOMG! ‘LOST’ PREMIERE DATE SET!
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TAKE BACK THE SEATS
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THE PERFECT GIFT FOR THE JACKASS IN YOUR LIFE
three-time champs in meaningless awards
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January 2nd, 2009 at 12:18 pm
That idiot Mark Schlereth was actually defending Favraro and blasting Thomas Jones for his radio comments. All I could think of was “Mark, get off Favraro’s nuts! You’ll end up kissing Berman!”
What the fuck do all these kissasses see in this country-fried sumbitch? If any other QB throws 2 TDs and 7 INTs in the last 3 games of the year, he’d be getting crucified!
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:31 pm
You really went the Muhammed Ali route? Yikes…still, well awarded.
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:43 pm
{Sound of a Jets fan struggling to get off the canvas to say something . . . but failing}
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:43 pm
Sure, Roy Williams won’t extend his arms past his sternum and his routes look like Billy Keane wandering through the park and he’s afraid that if he runs too hard he’ll sweat out his perm, but why single him out? The Cowboys lost by 38 points and gave up five turnovers (hee-hee). Shouldn’t the whole team get this award with a special Bitchness in Big Moments Citation for Romo?
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:49 pm
When an alleged quiet man like Thomas Jones speaks out against you…you’ve got problems.
January 2nd, 2009 at 12:55 pm
The Gunslinger shit his Real. Comfortable. Jeans. (To the sound of a classic rock song, chopped down to one catchy hook)
January 2nd, 2009 at 1:00 pm
Excellent choice. Favaro is too busy squirell huntin and modelling Wranglers to learn the plays. “You guys just run down the field and I’ll throw it somewhere” is not in the playbook. At least I don’t think it is. I hope he comes back, though. I hate the Jets almost as much as I hate the Steelers.
January 2nd, 2009 at 1:05 pm
@ Chad – Maybe it isn’t in the playbook, but by God it should be. After all, how do you defend a play that not even the receivers know?
January 2nd, 2009 at 1:14 pm
I think Romo should have won the award. The Cowbitches could still have made the playoffs with a win, but they chose to be the shitiest bed shitters that ever shitted the bed. And Romo was the shittiest shitter to ever shit.
/shit.
January 2nd, 2009 at 1:20 pm
Ha! Listening to podcast of PK on Dan Patrick, talking about Favaro. “I bet the GM’s heart sinks when he hears the comments”. Hahahahahaha. Guess what Favre, you have no bucket of LOVE with this team…
January 2nd, 2009 at 2:08 pm
It’s ok Brett, you’ve still got Peter King’s sweaty arms to crawl to..
January 2nd, 2009 at 2:13 pm
I hear Brett Favre’s spleen processes Red, White AND Blue blood cells.
His pancreas’s production of insulin and glucagon started at a 18:7 ratio but midway through the season changed to 11:21
MEDICAL-RELATED TERMINOLOGY BURN!!!
January 2nd, 2009 at 2:20 pm
I hope the bastard never retires. It’s so fun to see him fail.
January 2nd, 2009 at 2:25 pm
@ Gino,
It’s the having to see his fucking hick mug on ESPN 387,000 times a week when he’s not being fun-while-failing that pisses everyone off.
Fuck Favre. I hope he gets fucking raped by a moose.
January 2nd, 2009 at 3:14 pm
@Cheerleaders: Nail on the head. During one of the wretched bowl moments yesterday, I popped to ESPNews to see if anything was going on, to find a “will Favre retire” debate. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Shoot me now.
January 2nd, 2009 at 3:19 pm
NMC,
Definitely. Every Goddamn special segment they do on him and repeat ad nauseam, every time he’s talked about when he’s not even playing in the fucking game, all that Gunslinger shit, the damn Wrangler ads- just makes me want to go on a shooting spree.
Fuck Favre. I hope gets fucking raped by a moose… while Peter King and Tony Kornheiser are tied to a chair and forced to watch.
January 2nd, 2009 at 4:48 pm
For me, in the last 12 months, Favre has gone from a dude I always root for and thought I’d be telling my kids about to a pathetic, worse-than-Owens, pissy-boy prima donna media whore. I’m so sick of his “will he or won’t he” bitch routine that literally ALL I want to hear is that he’s addicted to painkillers again. Am a matter of fact, I’m gonna fuck my OWN face for bothering to waste the time to comment on him!
January 2nd, 2009 at 5:46 pm
@Gino Tourettsa:
Why would you allow King and Kornheiser to enjoy a sight like that?
January 2nd, 2009 at 8:21 pm
I found a valid argument for Brett as MVP. He, and he alone, made people hate the JETS. That’s gotta deserve some recognition.
January 2nd, 2009 at 8:44 pm
If Brett Favre signed to play for the Red Sox (and Celtics too!), ESPN would drown in its orgasmic frenzy.
January 2nd, 2009 at 10:12 pm
No “FUCK YOU BRETT FAVRE” tag?
January 3rd, 2009 at 9:30 am
“He, and he alone, made people hate the JETS. That’s gotta deserve some recognition.”
Awww, I dunno about that. Have you ever met a Jets fan? Farve just made everyone hate the Jets MORE.