Die in a Fire, Bawlmer
Your regularly scheduled WHO YA GOT? is being canceled postponed in favor of a liberal application of hate directed at Baltimore. Happy Holidays.
The NFL is finally catching onto the fact that the Steelers and the Ravens comprise the most heated rivalry going in the league right now. It’s got everything: hate, threats of violence, bragging about violence when it’s administered and two cities that have nothing better to do than obsess over sports. As someone well-versed in the ways of petty yet all-consuming hatred, I can tell you this is good shit.
Sure, the Ravens as a team are a band of craven tough-talking thugs who put out bounties on players after they lose, but there’s so much more to despise. Like the city they play in, for instance. It’s just like Richmond, Virginia, only with professional sports teams and more murder and syphilis! Here’s a quick rundown from me, an unabashed hater who wishes they all die while watching a screening of Hairspray.
FUCK YOU to Bart Scott. At least Ray Lewis has actually done something with his career, so he can get away with killing folks and dancing after every tackle. But you, you’re a poor man’s Carlos Emmons. Nice 1.5 sacks this season, superstar.
FUCK YOU, Rex Ryan, you giant goofy mongoloid. Way to stick around the team after getting passed over for head coach in favor of someone who looks like he’s 17. I bet he polishes off six bacon cheese rolls by kickoff.
FUCK YOU to the Chesapeake Bay. It’s not even a bay. “Behold the majestic estuary and its wiped-out crabbing industry!”
FUCK YOU to Cumberland, Dundalk, Frederick, Hagerstown, Towson, Calvert County, Annapolis, the Eastern Shore and all the other places the white people of Baltimore fled to rather than live in scary, scary Charm City. Enjoy your commute to M&T Bank in your frightening VW Bugs, you Old Bay-seasoned dicks.
FUCK YOU and your blubbering excuses. “Oh, Steelers fans only overwhelm M&T Bank Stadium because no one lives in Pittsburgh anymore.” Sure, Pittsburgh has lost 300,000 residents since the 1950s. You know another city that has lost 300,000 residents in the same time span? Baltimore.
FUCK YOU for taking pride in The Wire. “Hey, someone made a compelling drama about how our city is an unlivable, horribly mismanaged hellscape! B-MOOOOOORRRRREEEE” I hope you get left in a vacant townhouse.
FUCK YOU, Barry Levinson. Diner is overrated and Avalon is treacly garbage. Why can’t you make Baltimore-gets-nuked movies like Sum of All Fears?
FUCK YOU, Cal Ripken. Way to have your production slip so you can keep your precious streak going. And Carrie Fisher admires the way you’ve let yourself go, Iron Ham. On top of all that, you were the childhood hero of A-Rod. He kept a poster of you in his bedroom as a kid. That’s right. You’re A-Rod masturbation fodder.
FUCK YOUR alternative black uniforms. Notice how the Ravens incorporate more black into their lame jerseys seemingly every year? Quit copying the Steelers, you festering purple lumps of Grimace shit.
FUCK YOU for stealing Edgar Allan Poe. He’s more connected to Philly than your shit town.
FUCK YOU to 20-year-olds in Johnny Unitas jerseys. The Colts have been in Indy for almost a quarter century and they aren’t coming back, except to beat the Ravens in the playoffs. Even if you were born before 1984, you sure as shit weren’t around for Johnny U. Give it up.
FUCK YOUR aquarium. It’s the only good thing in that pit of despair you call a city. No wonder it costs $800 to get in.
FUCK YOU, Michael Phelps. You were retarded on Colbert last night plugging your ghostwritten book, just like you were on SNL, Entourage and the million other shows you’ve been on in your post-Olympics overexposure tour. I hope you die in the middle of a desert miles away from any body of water, you awkward dolphin dick.
FUCK Francis Scott Key. Thanks for giving dipshit Baltimore fans an opportunity to scream OOOOOOOOOOOOOO during the Anthem.
FUCK YOU, Natty Boh. Disgusting fucking crab juice of a beer. And it’s not even brewed in Baltimore anymore. Why don’t you take pride in a more hometown drug, like heroin laced with AIDS?
And lastly, FUCK YOU, purple camo pants, if only I could find you. You blend so seamlessly with your surroundings. One day I’ll track you down.
DON’T HATE ON FISHER HOUSE THOUGH! This week, we’re holding the second annual KsK Kares Kharity Drive for Fisher House, which helps build temp housing for disabled veterans and their families. You can donate directly to FH here.
Tags: hate, hate-tinged homerism, seriously fuck baltimore, sexy friday is better with hate sex, xmas ape
December 12th, 2008 at 8:16 am
Man, has Siragusa really let himself go after his playing days.
What? That’s photo from his playing days?
December 12th, 2008 at 8:28 am
Not bad, but you left out so much. How about our insufferable inferiority complex? Also most people in Baltimore have no love for any of those surrounding counties, except for Towson, and you left out Pikesville, our living and ongoing experiment in white flight. How about how Ravens territory is only Baltimore City and County, while the rest of the state hates the Ravens as much as the world at large? Or how about all of our prep schools are in one block, creating a concentrated mass of doucheocity? See there is plenty more to hate about Baltimore.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:30 am
This Pittsburgh fluffing is getting ridiculous.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:39 am
That is some REEEEEEAL good hate being put out there today.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:39 am
Such visceral hate is clearly a manifestation of conflicted love–dare one say it, a love that cannot speak its name–for a city that is quite clearly superior to Pittsburgh in all ways but one: total number of Lombardi Trophies.
Ape and Baltimore need to move to Connecticut or Massachusetts, get married and apply to adopt a poor black child.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:41 am
Bull. Shit. Philadelphia and Dallas have the nastiest rivalry in the NFL. Call me when somebody puts a hit on a kicker and starts throwing projectiles at the opposing coach (and I don’t mean your feces, which I know is a demonstration of dominance among you subhuman primates). “Festering purple lumps of Grimace shit” is going into my permanent insult rotation, though, so kudos for that.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:41 am
Whoa whoa whoa, you leave Old Bay out of this!
December 12th, 2008 at 8:43 am
Wait, Ape is having hate sex with a guy from Baltimore?
I didn’t think Ray Ray was his type.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:54 am
Fuck you, Ron Santo’s Legs. Can you not see that everyone hates Baltimore? Its not just the yinzers! Only the Ravens could have an owner that is ranked #1 on another otherwise redundant ESPN list http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=keri/owners/070924 Let the HATE continue!
December 12th, 2008 at 8:55 am
“Even if you were born before 1984, you sure as shit weren’t around for Johnny U. Give it up.”
We will all remember this the next time we are accosted by some some towel-waving asshat Steelers fan in his 20s jerking off to Pittsburgh’s five championships.
/Hates both teams
December 12th, 2008 at 9:04 am
I know Michael Phelps and fucked his ex, he is the gawkiest toolbag the east coast has ever seen
December 12th, 2008 at 9:05 am
Wow, Christmas Ape never recycles jokes.
//makes fun of least originial contributor to KSK
December 12th, 2008 at 9:07 am
You forgot the rousing Fuck You to fifty year olds who paint their faces purple like they were raised in the Ravens tradition. Your team was invented 12 freaking years ago because an incontinent old man got tired of playing in a Cleveland stadium with no luxury boxes. Trent Dilfering your way to a Super Bowl ring doesn’t mean you have a proud tradition – it means opposing players were afraid Ray Lewis was going to murder them on the field.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:07 am
Why the fuck is that fat fuck wearing a fucking duck call around his neck? Is that some fucked up Raven tradition or something? Oh, maybe it’s a Raven call……
December 12th, 2008 at 9:09 am
By the way, that Bacon Cheese Roll gave me a semi.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:10 am
Wow. This is sure to not end well. Can’t wait!
December 12th, 2008 at 9:11 am
I’d respond by writing a similar list about Pittsburgh, but there’s nothing to fuck there.
HEY-OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Also, “Yins” is the gayest piece of regional slang/dialect in the entire country. I’d rather be from “North Cackalacky” than ever use “yins” in any context besides mockery.
Homos.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:12 am
Josh, if you are talking about the Phelps ex that I’m thinking of, I think just about everyone in baltimore had a go
December 12th, 2008 at 9:13 am
Oh Ape, as much as I love this, people who are actually from Pittsburgh hate Cleveland so much more. I know the rivalry isn’t much of a rivalry any more (because Cleveland can’t, you know, win), but still, it’s there. When I was in a Steelers bar after Super Bowl 40 here in New York, the whole place started chanting “Cleveland sucks!” during the victory celebration.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:17 am
Ripken’s the only good thing about Baltimore. The only thing.
I’d like to add FUCK YOU, Inner Harbor. Overpriced, overrated tourist trap with nothing that I can’t find in a non-hellhole city like Boston or Philly.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:18 am
Ha- its funny because both cities could reasonably pass for capitals of third world countries. But seriously, the most heated rivalry in sports is the Patriots vs. whoever is on their schedule that week. No one denies this.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:18 am
Not exactly the start to Sexy Friday that I was hoping for.
The hate, on the other hand, was pitch perfect. Bravo sir, bravo.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:20 am
Oh I think I love this. It cracks me up how the Unitas jerseys come out immediately after a Ravens loss. “Huh? oh, well I always was a Colts fan hon, gotta know your historee”
December 12th, 2008 at 9:25 am
@White Boom Boom: Oh, I know Cleveland is most hated as a town by Steelers fans, but the Ravens rivalry is the only one with any juice the last 10 years. Also, I’ve lived closer to Baltimore most of my life, so I personally hate them more.
@Tim Tebow’s Girlfriends Tit: Oh, I’m guilty of the five rings stuff. And it’s obnoxious, I’ll grant you that. Luckily my hatred let’s me see beyond my own annoying qualities and dislike others without qualm.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:27 am
hate hate hate hate hate hate hate
December 12th, 2008 at 9:29 am
@Lawrence
It is yinz.
@Tim Tebow’s Girlfriend’s Tits
touche’, I agree wholeheartily which is why SuperBowl XL means so much to me. Forget one for the thumb, one for us.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:46 am
Maybe it’s the fact that they stole a team from the Brownies. Or that their owner is a massive tool. Or that they wear purple. Or that their fans are fair-weather (although that facilitates our attending their home games). Or Ray Ray’s spastic “dance” before kickoff. Or their mascot is a FUCKING RAVEN.
But, I think the moment my hatred for the Ravens passed that of the Brownies was when Ray Lewis, at one of ESPN’s contrived “round-table discussions” with great linebackers from over the years looked directly at LC Greenwood and Mel Blount and said that the Ravens’ Defense was the best of all time. As far as I am concerned they all can get fucked with a rusty tail pipe.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:49 am
I would think that any team represented by the glass house that is Steely McBeam would not be throwing stones at any other mascots.
/the new Pat Patriot is almost as gay as Steely. almost.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:50 am
Steely is awful gay, but at least he’s never at any of the games.
December 12th, 2008 at 9:52 am
needs more cal ripken jr hate
December 12th, 2008 at 10:08 am
You leave Ripken out of this, you understand!
Also I never knew Wayne Knight was a Ravens fan.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:21 am
“Born in Allentown, Pa. and raised in the D.C. ‘burbs, yet a lifelong Steelers fan. How bullshit is that?”
Very. That’s all we need to know. Baltimore sends back a heartfelt “Fuck You” to you, the Steelers, DC, and Big Ben, who will once again get his bell rung on Sunday.
And to whoever said that Maryland outside of Baltimore hates the Ravens – good. The rest of Maryland sucks.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:24 am
I used to get mad at the rabid ravens hate from the yinzer brigade.
Then I moved to Pittsburgh for grad school, and I realized that the Stillers are all they have. Its the most miserable, disgusting, pathetic city I’ve ever seen. And dear god are the people ugly. Primantti Bros. does not look good on you, just stop.
Theres a reason Steelers fans travel well, because anyone with half a chance at life gets the f*ck out of Pittsburgh.
So please, keep hating. I understand now, and its ok. You let it out sugar.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:24 am
“The NFL is finally catching onto the fact that the Steelers and the Ravens comprise the most heated rivalry going in the league right now”
Well, to be honest, we knew there is some sort of rivalry there. But since Pittsburgh is involved, no one really cares.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:25 am
It’s hard to describe the pure, noble, and, yes, beautiful hatred that any right-thinking person can have for the Ravens — a hatred that burns with the fire and purity of a thousand white-hot suns. But you, Ape, have come close.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:30 am
Barbara Mikulski. She wears underwear with dick holes.
What can I say about say about your offense that hasn’t already been said about Afganistan – it looks bombed out and depleted.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go home and put some water in Joe Flacco’s momma’s dish
December 12th, 2008 at 10:32 am
Also, “Yins” is the gayest piece of regional slang/dialect in the entire country. I’d rather be from “North Cackalacky” than ever use “yins” in any context besides mockery.
all those Pittsburgh transplants who now live in Charlotte..say yinz
December 12th, 2008 at 10:33 am
Steely is awful gay, but at least he’s never at any of the games.
Is that new this year? He was sure as hell there last year. And if I could lace the beer at Heinz Field with cyanide, I would. I don’t even mind the team itself, but Steelers fans are worse than cock rot. Baltimore’s not much better, I just don’t want to get stabbed.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:34 am
two cities that have nothing better to do than obsess over sports AND FOOD. Ape you forgot about the food, which I thought was obvious after the 1st photo and that HUMONGOUS steelers fan that was posted yesterday by a sick, sick commenter.
I obviously hate both teams, but didn’t Bart Scott nearly break Ronrastname’s back with a pile driver sack while Willie Parker stood by watching and cringing because he missed the Blitz pickup?
Can’t we just nike both cities and call it even?
December 12th, 2008 at 10:41 am
This thread will cause more violence then “Hit em Up”.
Whole Baltimore clique dressing up trying to be Steelers.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:42 am
primantti Bros. does not look good on you, just stop.
easy on the primanti brothers…when the Steelers come to Nashville..im buying…
http://www.postgazette.com/steelers/20030111primantisteel4p4.asp
December 12th, 2008 at 10:49 am
NUKE not nike!
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
December 12th, 2008 at 10:50 am
Can’t we just nike both cities and call it even?
They could use some sweatshops for employment.
December 12th, 2008 at 10:56 am
The hate emanating from my computer is like a black death ray with gold stripes. Ape may be an angry young man.
Everyone hates the Pittsburgh Steelers and their retard fans who have nothing else going on in their lives. But, as a Pats fan, please kick Bawmores ass this week. I want Flacco out for the rest of the year. I’d say I want Ray-Ray out, but let’s face it, without a knife in his hand, he’s only good for jumping on piles.
Hate Hate Hate (I’m chanting)
December 12th, 2008 at 10:58 am
@abbyd. Pittsburgh is a great city, despite what may remain in the national stereotype. We aren’t the rusted-out smog filled city of the 70s any more. In fact, we’re an industry leader in healthcare, education, banking, software development, etc.
Not sure what grad program you came here for, but my guess is you know the truth…open your eyes.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:04 am
FUCK YOUR aquarium. It’s the only good thing in that pit of despair you call a city.
Hey, what about the ESPN Zone??
December 12th, 2008 at 11:11 am
Pittsburgh has been classified “NWB,” for “Nuclear Whipping Boy.” In the first moments of a nuclear war, Pittsburgh will be bombed at will by all friendly nations to calibrate their missiles.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:15 am
FUCK YOU, KSK, for not knowing how to spell “Edgar Allan Poe.”
December 12th, 2008 at 11:20 am
No white people fled to Dundalk, they were banished there by Satan for being over-the-top white trash that’s not even funny too laugh at anymore.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Pittsburgh is a great city, despite what may remain in the national stereotype. We aren’t the rusted-out smog filled city of the 70s any more. In fact, we’re an industry leader in healthcare, education, banking, software development, etc.
Healthcare: Lots of illness in Pittsburgh.
Education: Lots of people who require teaching in Pittsburgh.
Banking: Lots of people who require loans in Pittsburgh.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:22 am
Actually, Pittsburgh WAS listed as the primary target by the Soviets during the Cold War, ahead of DC. This was due to the 92% share of the STEEL industry that called Western PA home at the time and it’s importance to any mounting war effort. Baltimore was likely seen as the appalling STD-ridden, Homeless filled, degenerate unemployed-filled cess-pool it is to this day.
/nice faggy nickname, though
December 12th, 2008 at 11:23 am
…and don’t forget Baltimore’s poor excuse for public transportation – The Light Rail! It goes nowhere!
December 12th, 2008 at 11:24 am
Whoa whoa whoa, you leave Old Bay out of this!
Agreed. Old Bay is a sign that god loves us and wants us to be happy. I would like to add a “fuck your tired animosity toward the Colts” since Indy-Baltimore is the most one-sided “rivalry” ever. No one in Indy gives a shit about the Ravens outside of shutting them out in the playoffs or embarrassing their overhyped defense in week 6.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:35 am
Wow. Suck a fucking dick, whoever wrote this. And I thought I had a lot of hate when I did basically this same thing, 10 days ago.
http://www.bmorebirdsnest.com/?p=203
Ravens are gonna stomp that Squealer ass.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:48 am
@NestMinder: you think you have a patent on hatred? Welcome to the blogosphere.
http://dcsteelernation.blogspot.com/2008/10/not-enough-hatred.html
/written in October
December 12th, 2008 at 11:54 am
@Doc Holliday
Actually the light rail does go somewhere…directly into traffic! Zing!!
December 12th, 2008 at 12:02 pm
So that’s what Jay Landsman does when he’s not eating chicken, reading porno mags and obsessing over the board and the clearance rate.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:06 pm
For the record, I lived in Frederick for like 10 years and it is totally dominated by Skins fans. Also, Cumberland is Steelers land for some reason. Probably because everyone that lives there is an asshole.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:07 pm
Yep, sounds about right for Baltiless, but you need more references to the murder rate and burning vacants. Or, as my aunt calls it, “Baltimore’s personality.”
Not that NoVa’s a great place, but it ain’t the Sixth Circle of Hell.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Your hate has made you powerful!
December 12th, 2008 at 12:17 pm
I hate me some Ravens as well (Hail Skins), but don’t show your geeky ass down here in Fredneck lest you want a Steston shoved up your ass.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:23 pm
@Boom!
The funny thing it, it literally does go right into traffic. Whoever designed the LR was most likely also involved in designing the Baltimore bus benches that say, “Baltimore: The City That Reads!”
/so not fucking kidding about above quote
December 12th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Don’t know shit about the city, I just hate the team.
Steelers payback tour continues……first Jax, then NE, now BAL.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
@Doc
The bus benches were great for two reasons, one no one in the city can read, and two no one could see the slogan with the bums sleeping in the way
December 12th, 2008 at 12:45 pm
So, uh, anybody no anything about the duck call that fucktard is wearing?
December 12th, 2008 at 12:53 pm
Seriously, any Stillers fan bashing another city is too comically ironic for me to understand.
December 12th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Browns fan here. Fuck you Baltimore. Fuck you Art. Fuck the Ravens. I hate the Steelers too but at least I can admit they have a great organization
Art Modell: May you die a painful death you piece of dog shit.
December 12th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
here, here, ape!
this shall be a most glorious sunday.
i would say that all of baltimore can go to hell, but baltimore itself is already an inner circle of hell.
December 12th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
@ Dixie -
For someone that talks about how Pittsburgh being stereotyped, you sure toss around some negative stereotypes about Baltimore. Baltimore also houses some of the greatest medical hospitals in the world (Johns Hopkins (#1), University of Maryland Medical Center, Union Memorial, GBMC, etc.), and has tons of historical relevance to our nation (Ft. McHenry).
Plus your reference to the Russian threat to Pittsburgh is a typical thing out of that town – a reference to the 1970s.
@ smurphette -
Your mention of the Colts is an interesting one considering the Colts never shut out the Ravens in the playoffs (get your facts straight), and also, now all 3 teams mentioned (Colts, Steelers, and Ravens) have won only 1 Super Bowl this decade. Dominance? Hardly. It only matters if you win the big game. Let’s all be good football fans and just hate the Patriots and Redskins fans.
December 12th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
that is some good hate. i kind of like baltimore but i commend your efforts. that was fun. too bad you dont know bmore prep schoolers, otherwise you could have included some good hating on lax practice bro.
December 12th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
The only things I really hate aboot the Ravens are Ray Lewis and their soccer club logo.
December 12th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
Whoa Whoa Whoa while god loving Calvert County does have a lot of illegal Balmer immigrants lets not forget it is redskins country. You should have thrown White Marsh and White Trash Perry Hall on there and it would much more accurate. Fuck the rats with wings- Go skins.
December 12th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
http://blogimoreravens.com/2008/12/things-better-than-pittsburgh.html
December 12th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
@ abbyd. Says:
“Then I moved to Pittsburgh for grad school, and I realized that the Stillers are all they have. Its the most miserable, disgusting, pathetic city I’ve ever seen.”
What doe that say about you then, since you chose Pittsburgh for grad school?
People who rag on where they live are pathetic. Sack up and move and quit your bitching.
December 12th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
I actually love it when b-more fans wear Unitas jerseys…because i don’t think the fucktards realize that the man was born in Pittsburgh, as were several great nfl quarterbacks. And while I’ve always hated the Browns, i do believe that my hatred for the GAY-vens has increased and surpassed it. See, at least the Browns know their place and have never been dumb enough to assume that they could ever be superior to the Stillers. Until they moved from a shitty town to an even shittier one and got some murderers on the roster. James Harrison doesn’t need a knife, Ray. He can kill with his bare hands. I hope your eye gets poked out by Santonio’s giant cock you convulsing, retarded chicken dancing motherfucker! HATE HATE HATE!
December 12th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
don’t hate on primanti’s…it’s the only thing that can keep you from puking after a night of slamming iron city beer.
December 12th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
I have to disagree with your Barry Levinson hatred. Diner, Tin Men and Bugsy are all awesome movies.
December 12th, 2008 at 4:36 pm
I have lived in Hagerstown almost 20 years.. I am so fucking sick and tired of Redskins this,And Redskins that..Oh wait, that is when they actually won games..Now it’s Ravens baby, not in this town at least.we have a Steelers bar in the north end,and at least half the bars in this town show Steeler games,why? because no one wants to watch a fucking gay ass Ravens team,Or an even gayer Redksins team! final score sunday,Steelers 21,Convicts 6 Flacco gets sand in his vagina during the 1st quarter.and then Ray Ray gets his acl popped
December 12th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
I have a friend (whose wife ironically goes to Hopkins) who knows nothing about sports and saw Cal on TV and immediately thought he looked like a Nazi. I told my part-Jewish/part-Irish Baltimore native friend of this, and needless to say, we aren’t on speaking terms lately.
December 12th, 2008 at 5:21 pm
Woah woah woah hold up. You’re telling me that someone hates the Steelers more than us miserable Seahawks fans? Christ even the most fair weather of fans here (and we got a few of those flakey fucks) have no love for the Steelers.
December 12th, 2008 at 5:35 pm
Cal Ripken Jr., Old Bay and Annapolis > Anything to come out of Pittsburgh, ever.
December 12th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
I don’t like either team or city, but that first picture of Obese Retarded Ravens Fan is a brilliant (even Poe-esque) rebuke on Baltimore, so Pittsburgh wins here.
Also, as far as I know, the Steelers are the only NFL team to have two of its players (Mean Joe Greene and Rocky Bleier) to appear in an SCTV skit, so… eh, never mind.
December 12th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I wouldn’t fuck Cal Ripken with Barbara Mikulski’s cock.
December 12th, 2008 at 8:08 pm
I WOULD TOTALLY FUCK CAL RIPKEN!
December 12th, 2008 at 8:11 pm
@TheBigTexas: My bad, I forgot about the Ravens getting those two field goals. Still, not allowing an offensive touchdown on the road in the playoffs is pretty good, too. And I never used the word “dominance” – I was simply pointing out that Ravens fans seem to think of the Colts as rivals while Colts fans definitely don’t think of the Ravens that way.
December 12th, 2008 at 11:59 pm
Jeez, Ape, I would have happily provided you with some fresh Baltimore targets rather than the same old crap you rail on every time the Steelers play the Ravens.
On the plus side, it was a wonderful opportunity to re-live Bart Scott knocking RONGRASTNAME into next week. Brings a smile to my face every time.
And here’s a little Steelers-fan eye candy for you to wank off to:
http://nitespyder.com/SteelersFan.jpg
December 13th, 2008 at 12:29 am
I like what you did there Miles. Start by saying I’m using tired Ravens insults, then follow up with the most overused Steelers-bashing picture on the Internet.
Top form, really.
December 13th, 2008 at 7:17 pm
Thay fella, don’t be hating on Bawlmer now. Other than not having a dethent plathe for me to get my unibrow waxed thith thity hath thome wonderful thingth to offer.
Do I look totally gay in purple or what? Faaaaabulouth!!!
December 14th, 2008 at 5:27 am
One of your finest moments, Ape. Represent tomorrow and know that James Harrison would make Marlo, Chris Partledge, and even Avon cry in Jessup. Omar would be busy making Kordell his next stick-up kid, but that’s another story. HERE WE GO STEELERS HERE WE GO!!!
December 19th, 2008 at 5:30 pm
Another dumb ass hater… do you have ANYTHING better to do with your life??? obviously not… it’s just football dickhead. Get a life. Get a job.
January 16th, 2009 at 12:07 pm
Grew up in the Baltimore Burbs, now live in Seattle. THE PITTSBURGLER STEALERS WILL DIE THIS WEEKEND! DIE! DIE!DIE!!!11!!
GO GETTUM, STABBY1!
February 5th, 2009 at 10:52 am
dwindling population and rapid unemployment are something to be REAL proud of the third world nation of Pittsburgh, seriously dude, get a job or get a girlfriend and stop hating on Baltimore.
Yes, I have nothing better to do than comment in two month old threads. Also my blog is retarded and sucks a fat baby’s dick.
February 5th, 2009 at 1:24 pm
lmfao
February 5th, 2009 at 1:29 pm
dont be so hard on yourself, you blog doesn’t suck that bad
February 7th, 2009 at 1:26 pm
What a bunch of fucking assholes who ever wrote this FUCK YOU AND I MEAN FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You are a Fucking retard Dick sucking asseating FUCKING piece of SHIT