HI AMERICA
EVEN WITH THE OWIE IN MY SHOULDERSPOT, I HAD TO EXERCISE MY DUTY AS AN AMERICAN AND RESERVE A COPY OF GEARS OF WAR II AT THE GAMESPOT THIS MORNING.
BUT NEXT DOOR I SAW BUNCHES OF PEOPLE ALL GATHERED TOGETHER. I THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE CHOCO TACO TASTING BUT IT WAS SOMETHING CALLED VOTING INSTEAD.
I ASKED HINES WHAT WAS VOTING AND HE SAID SOMETHING COMPLEX AND SO I THOUGHT ABOUT TIDAL WAVES INSTEAD. STILL WE WENT INTO THE PLACE AND THEY PUT ME ON THIS MACHINE. I WENT PEW PEW PEW ON THE BUTTONS AND THE MACHINE SAID I VOTED AND THEY GAVES ME A STICKER.
I TOLD THE MAN I VOTED WITH A OWIE IN MY SHOULDER AND THEY EVEN GAVE ME TWO STICKERS FOR BEING A TOUGH BEN! VOTING IS THE BEST THING SINCE LINEMEN WHO BLOCK FOR YOU! I HOPE TO DO IT EVERY YEAR.
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@monkey business
Yes, a choco taco is a real thing. But whether it’s ice cream in a taco shaped waffle cone with chocolate sour cream or Big Ben just having jungle fever is for you to find out on your own.
Reverend Ike, Secretary of the Treasure
Richard Pryor, Minister of Education
Stevie Wonder, Secretary of FINE Arts
@ FMRA
Agreeeeeeed
/wonders if Good Humor-Breyers is publically traded
Monkey Business – Oh, it’s very, very real.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Choco_Taco
Also, where Rongrastname lacks in intellectual capacity, he makes up for in great taste in video games.
@ Gino: No Soul Man on the list?
HI BARACK
Slothrop killed this with the first comment. Well played.
I’m just waiting for Benjamin to refer to himself as “A TOUGH BEN” in one of his post-game press conferences.
i can’t decide if ben or ocho is my favorite mental midget around here.
A Few Songs to Play Tonight:
“First Black President” Blow Fly
“Funky President” James Brown
“You’re The Man (Pts I & II)” Marvin Gaye
“Eric B. Is President” Eric B. & Rakim
“I’m Payin’ Taxes, What Am I Buyin’?” Fred Wesley & The J.B.s
“One Nation Under A Groove” Funkadelic
“Chocolate City” Parliament
“Message From A Black Man” The Temptations
“Living in America” James Brown
Point of order: is there actually something called a Choco Taco, or is it just a fevered dream of the KSK staff?
Dammit. Heidi Klum and Slave Kristen.
HI AMERICA
Ape wins.
you guys fix the “calibration error” on the electronic voting machines that counts a vote for Obama as a vote for McCain yet?
Perfect
Seriously, Heidi Klum playing Guitar Hero in sexier underwear than has ever graced the floor of my apartment and Kristen Bell in a Slave Leia outfit is giving me the biggest nerd boner ever.
Keep up the good work!
I’m surprised no one got on this yet, but +1 Porky. Well played.
Fixed
Good idea, El Duke
Man, I could really go for a choco taco right about now.
And no bad MS Paint of an “I Voted” sticker on Big Ben?
Stickers after voting? Is Rolf the Nazi shark behind this?
@Signal – You got sharpies? I had an old bic with no cap and a cardboard box on a fold up table as my booth. Still, someone in my county had to vote for Obama.
Hines told me not to vote for the one from Hawaii, he said that is where “great dish water” or something like that came from
Simply awesome. I completely forgot about Gears 2 this week, now I have another stop on my lunch break.
I would have gone “PEW PEW PEW” in the booth but unfortunately, it’s hard to have the same impact with a sharpie and a paper ballot. I need to move back to places with punch ballots.
Brilliant as always, I wish there were Ben/Hines posts every day
Sometimes I think the parallels between tidal waves and national politics is not so far-fetched at all.
Well played Ben, an extra choco taco for you tonight at desert.
I had my democratic process early: 6:15am. Bizarre, more people than usually there at 8:15pm.
Anywhoo, one of the booth’s curtain would not close, sending you into “privacy / vote” land.
My line worked…I think…maybe.
And no “pew, pew, pew” either. Sigh. I will blame it on the early hour.
This lacked HARFHARFHARF!
@Loose, there’s always next year or if we lived in Chicago we could have another chance to vote and do it.
Ahhh, UU, similar regrets.
Ape, this was one of the funniest Rongrastname posts ever. And I don’t know why. Maybe, it’s the PEW PEW PEW in the voting machine. I should have thought to do that this morning.
If they don’t count my provisional ballot that I had to fill out because the moron at the DMV fucked up and didn’t register me to vote, I’ma go ‘pew pew pew’ at the Elections Board on Friday.
/who answers ‘no’ to the question, do you want to register to vote? Like it’s hard to get out of jury duty.
I’m pissed I didn’t think of saying “pew pew pew…..” as I voted this morning
You can fix an election but you can’t fix stupid.
\Pretty sure Gears of War II will have bigger impact on my life than my state senator. Whoever the hell that is.
Hines gets annoyed because he can’t understand why every time he talks about “that Balack Obama” people start calling him a racist.
PEW PEW PEW = Amazing.
I had him pegged as more of a Bob Barr kind of guy
Just think how many people would vote if they had signs that said, “free hat”
Somebody should tell Ben that Starbucks will give you a free coffee today if you’re wearing your vote sticker. Or, in his case, hot cocoa.
He voted Green Party due to his affinity for natural grass. (Same as Ricky Williams)
hines wald rikes arr this today about erection today
Another vote for Nader!
It’s not a sticker, it’s a stencil.