Where Stars Are Born And Measts Are Made
Steve Harvey: Welcome back to Amateur Night at the world-famous Apollo theatre! How’s everybody doin’ tonight? Real good, real good. Our next performer just flew in from Washington, DC, and boy, are his arms tired. Help me give a big Apollo welcome to SENATAH! JOHN! McCAIN!
[McCain walks out. Audience applauds.]
McCain: Friends, did I ever tell you the one Hillary Clinton walked into Barack Obama’s office and said, “Hey, why does your economic plan involve raising taxes on only me?” Obama thought for a second and said, “No, no. I’m raising taxes on the RICH.” Get it?
[Crowd starts to boo]
McCain: What’s the difference between Barack Obama and a bar of soap? We KNOW the soap isn’t Muslim! Hey, these are the jokes, friends. Oh, I had a great one about the environment, just gimme a minute to remember it…
[crowd boos louder]
Crowd: Womp womp! Womp womp!
McCain: And then there’s the one where Barack Obama, Leelee Solbieski, and Mark Fuhrman walk into a bar. The bartender says, “If you’re here to see the goat, I have bad news. The goat is–
[sirens go off, crazy tap-dancing guy runs out]
Sandman Sims: Git y’ass off stage, fool!
McCain:Alright, I’m going, I’m going! Your meast is Aaron Ross, who had two interceptions and a touchdown last week. Thank you Harlem, goodnight!
Tags: MMP, Sean Taylor Memorial Meast of the Week, The late Sandman Sims
![[badge]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/themes/default/images/100121_FOXmsnBadge_200x50.gif)
November 20th, 2008 at 5:14 am
Thank God for Punte! He has yet to use up his “Giants for MEASTTTT!” quota.
November 20th, 2008 at 6:29 am
That was funny, but not funny haha, funny faux pas!
November 20th, 2008 at 7:50 am
Bad MSPaint?
Actually, fuck that, that pic’s awesome.
November 20th, 2008 at 8:05 am
I thought you weren’t allowed to mention Ross without also including either
A) his wife is an olympic runner
B) he played for the Longhorns
November 20th, 2008 at 8:14 am
Jeez punter, that’s just shockingly unoffensive.
November 20th, 2008 at 9:08 am
Of the 4 people you named, the most famous is Sandman Sims.
November 20th, 2008 at 9:40 am
Show an audience of blacks who wouldn’t beat McCain senseless and I’ll show you an audience consisting of Clarence Thomas and Condeleeza Rice.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:10 am
Very funny.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:18 am
How in the hell do you not select Spencer Larsen as your Meast? Lined up at FB, LB AND pulled special teams duty.
Womp, womp indeed.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:23 am
If the election has taught us anything – its that black people don’t know who John McCain is.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:28 am
I was wondering where in the hell this was going. HO. HO. HO.
@TB: We’d only fight him if he could raise his arms to fight back.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:36 am
Hey good job misspelling Leelee’s name.
November 20th, 2008 at 10:45 am
Matty Fawkin Cassel has the game of his fawkin life and you give that queeah cornahback the meast awahd?
/Tommyd
November 20th, 2008 at 10:46 am
A note to my fellow Giants fans: We can officially stop lobbying for Meast consideration. I know, I’ve been up near the front of this movement, but our collective dick has long since gone numb from the amount of praisellatio we’ve been getting.
November 20th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Black people do not care about John McCain
:: cue Mike Myers’ blank stare ::
November 20th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
probably the dumbest blog post i have ever read…
November 20th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Live at the apollo, it’s another Krusty Komedy Klassic!
(KKK)
November 20th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
@Devine: Motion denied. The difference between the Giants and some of the other teams around the league [coughCOWBOYScough] is that said praisellatio is justified and does not turn the team into a bunch of overrated assholes. Although you do just start feeling bad for some of the other teams at this point.
/hoping for at least 2 more Giants for Meast.