Notwithstanding the showdown of stubbly ex-alcoholic quarterbacks and the proliferation of dominating defensive tackles, one of whom has a predilection for stomping opposing centers, we just can’t resist a war of the waistlines. And so it is with known megaendomorphs Eric Mangini and LenDale White. It’s a nominally close game between teams fairly close in the standings but miles apart in talent. Of course, that’s not the spread these two are concerned about. WHO YA GOT?
Eric Mangini__________________LenDale White
Overshadowed, but not completely because they’re big, by:
Bill Belichick__________________Chris Johnson
Thanksgiving favorite
The food!______________________What he said
Eating position
Head of table______________________Wherever the scraps are
FreeDarko Spirit Animal
Paunchy circus bear____________________Exploding whale
Why shouldn’t feed him from the stands
May name child after you________________________Will probably follow you home
How many seats does he get on the plane?
Half of first class_____________________How many are in the cargo hold?
Does he outweigh the team’s center?
Yeah, but not his sister_________________Not with the labor people
Finishing move
The two-hand fried ice cream scoop_____________________Two-yard gain, one calorie loss
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+1 UU
What, no Peytonface vs. Marmalard? Sigh.
@ Stu – Standing next to Kris Jenkins also has a slimming effect.
The real loser is the post-game buffet. It never stood a chance with those two.
Mangini knows that polos have a slimming effect
this game should be on Food Network
They’ve got a nice pair of them bologna tits.
I don’t know, Mangini does have mob ties.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWoNauDxGqc.
@ Favre’s Next Interception: I think Mangini’s tats are bigger. You can actually see them through his shirt. Homeboy needs a bra.
I heard Lendale had his mouth permanently locked in the open position to maximize his eating potential.
I approve of any and all insults to Holly Mangold.
Lendale’s tats and cornrows push himover the top. Mangini doesn’t know how to accesorize.
I give the edge to Mangini because he has video footage of of a playground fight Lendale got in back in the 6th grade so he knows his tendencies and weaknesses.
Aww little LenDale looks so cute. I actually saw him in Trader Joes monday in the organic section. I think he was lost.
LenWhale doing his best Porter impression: “STUFF MAH MOUF!”
Sorry, FMRA, I have to disagree. I think he radiates douche.
If any fan would know a fat running back when they saw one, it’d be a steeler fan who grew up watching jerome bettis.
Did she really just say that creampuff was cute?!?!
It’s a shame. Mangini would be cute if he weren’t such a fatass.
Is there any way both teams can lose this game? Please?
#1 reason to watch the Red Zone Channel on DirecTV: When replaying LenDale White highlights, anchor Andrew Sicilliano announces “LenDale smells food!” or “LenDale is on his way to the buffet.”
Oh yeah, ManGenius is a bloated bastard.