HERE WE GO DOUCHEBAG HERE WE GO
11.03.08
I won’t be joining you fine readers for the liveblog this evening, because I’ll be sitting in my wondrous limited view seats in the shittiest stadium in the NFL. If that’s what it takes to miss Berman with Obama and McCain, it was well worth being ripped off. Worry not, the Maj will probably be here, because rich boy is wealthy enough to afford season tickets and never use them.
This is actually the first Steelers regular season game I’ve attended in 10 years, since I went to the first ever game in PSI Net/M&T Bank/Whatever they call that shithole with purple seats in Baltimore in 1998 (Steelers won). That probably means I’m a bad fan. Whatevs. Still stoked.


The Pittsburgh Pirates.
16 straight YEARS of sub – .500 baseball. Folks, you have to TRY and be that incompetent.
Did you really stencil that on your wall?
/Have trouble picking up sarcasm
//If you did stencil that, damn impressive
O AN HE SEXY
@ OCFC: NICE
true story about MWB:
i bought the book and found crumbs in the first chapter. normally this would be kind of annoying, but they were the crumbs i left there a week prior when i was flipping through the book while i was eating at barnes and noble. apparently they hadn’t sold the one copy that they had on sale.
hilarious book though
@Needs More Cheerleaders: Didn’t read your comment first.
EXACTLY.
Basements sure are much brighter these days…and not as moldy.
Be sure to go over the NFL Fan Conduct Policy again.
Is that sunlight? In your mom’s basement? What’d you do, dig a tunnel out to the alley?
For the record the aren’t MY seats, just seats I could access if I so choose. But I’d much prefer to watch on my couch.
Ah, the couch. Comfy. Access to food and beer less than $9. Access to restrooms without standing beyond 12 drunks at a piss-stained urinal. Does not require a 1-mile walk. Ticket price: $0. And with a 42-inch HDTV flatscreen, the view is actually better.
Why do people attend games at FedEx again?
http://www.mineospizza.com/
Is that your collection of Good Charlotte CDs in the corner?
Oh, and in case you were wondering about the jersey color and the gang signs, it should be noted that Ape is the newest member of Pittsburgh’s fiercest upper middle class street gang, The Squirrel Hill Crew.
Ape is Jewish?
PROTIP: Under the picture of the cat and Genghis Khan is the notice your electricity is being turned off. You might want to take care of that.
Is that a clip from a new Subway $5 Foot Long commercial?
And that hat definitely needs to be not just crooked, but Plaxico crooked.
Note the Men With Balls by the lamp. Drew pervades all.
I’m the first one to make the Michael Rapaport reference? Really?
Weed and dAndy, I was going to throw out something involving bunkbeds and Terry Bradshaw but the YMCA comment trumped my brain.
grimey stretched the field on the first play.
XMas Ape’s print journalism career lies a-mouldering in the grave, but his will to post questionable pictures of himself in Steelers gear goes marching on.
I can’t believe the YMCA let you paint the Steelers logo on the wall.
you look strained… FYI, a little Metamucil will help you pinch that loaf before kickoff
not impressed with the jizz towel, looks small and futile.
Is that your algebra textbook in the bottom left corner?
Is your family from Quinzee?
Another +1 to Grimey at the top. Nice work.
Also, the hat needs to be crooked.
That’s a pretty nice dorm room.
Let’s talk about what we don’t see in the picture. Ape’s camera is sitting on his pillow in which the case was personally signed by Jerome Bettis back in 2003 and hasn’t been washed since. That pillow is sitting on top of his Steelers sheet and comforter set his mom got him last Christmas and that’s just the top bunk…..
I have little doubt you’ll manage to be blacked-out by kickoff, Ape. You look spectacularly douche-y, by the way. Naturally, as a Boston gal, I am turned on by this. Enjoy the game.
+1 Grimey, all the way at the top. Hate that commercial.
Who buys the alternate?
Myron Cope’s body lies a-mouldering in the grave, But his stupid-ass terrible towel goes marching on.
This picture is a total fake, you guys. Michael Rappaport would never be caught dead in a Pirates hat. Though the gang signs do look authentic.
Spilly- they control the territory from that kosher market to that other kosher market. but sushi too is sort of a safe zone.
Should have went with this jersey Ape:
http://www.ebaycloseout.com/servlet/the-207/USC-HINES-WARD-%2319/Detail
gray jersey in honor of Jean Grey?
Nope. Many out of town Steeler fans identify with the gray jersey because it reminds them of home where everything is gray.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/danieljludwig/138596810/
@UM
As a resident of Squirrel Hill, I would have to assume the other gang members are 2 old Jews and a Czech.
Cowherd bashed NFL fans on his radio show today. Apparently his producer got her feelings hurt at the Cowboy/Giants game yesterday. Called poeple who actually GO to games ‘meatballs, loosers’, etc. Make us proud Ape!!
gray jersey in honor of Jean Grey?
Dammit, a Pirates hat? Can’t we suffer in peace?
Have fun, Ape. Black and gold by 6.
BUT WHO WILL FEED JEAN GREY?!
You’re throwing gang signs. I’m alerting Commissioner Gooddell.
Alternate color team jersey? CHECK
Hat of city baseball team? CHECK
Immitation terrible towel? CHECK
Godspeed, Ape. Godspeed.
‘They say taupe is very soothing.’
If you want to broadcast success, shouldn’t you wear a Penguins hat instead of a Pirates one?
Oh, and in case you were wondering about the jersey color and the gang signs, it should be noted that Ape is the newest member of Pittsburgh’s fiercest upper middle class street gang, The Squirrel Hill Crew.
They are not to be trifled with!
Oh, and I won’t be around too much tonight, but I’ll certainly drop in.
For the record the aren’t MY seats, just seats I could access if I so choose. But I’d much prefer to watch on my couch.
No, I stenciled that on my wall. You like?
Is that a fat head?
MWB and AFSOP
do you own any other books?
also, nice “MWB” product placement near the lamp.
Also “A Few Seconds of Panic”!
/leaving now
Dead Tree Ape?
also, nice “MWB” product placement near the lamp.
Who took the picture, Steely Mcbeam?
wearing a Steeler helmet would up the douche factor by x100.
Godspeed, Ape.
You probably won’t want to read the comments even if the Steelers win.
What’s with the lamp?