Oh sure, Tom Brady, Laurence Maroney and Rodney Harrison are out for the year. And Reggie Wayne and Joseph Addai might not play. But Bob Sanders is making his return (at least until he gets hurt again sometime in the third quarter). It’s almost the same game it was last year, except neither team is coming in undefeated. Actually the Colts are playing for their playoff lives. But it’s the Colts and the Patriots. That means very real overhyped animosity! None of that media manufactured stuff. You just know BenJarvus Green-Ellis and Chad Simpson hate each other with the tight-fisted fury of a hundred political operatives.
I have to say I’m not buying the story of the wife-submitted DVD with the alternate camera angle that saved Vince Wilfork, the Patriots heir apparent to the Rodney Harrison cheap shot throne, from getting suspended. How is she getting access to that game tape? Was she the videographer after Matt Walsh left the team? Maybe she knows Goodell likes fattie porn and THAT’S what was on the disc.
Speaking of fatties, here, per the demands of commenter Otto Man, is the shot of a be-FUPAed Colts coach looking as though he’s in the handicap stall. Did Charlie Weis make the short trip for the game?
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/redskins_thin_man1-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/rodneyharrisongrief-150x150.jpg)
Colts vs. Patriots. The AFC version of the Redskins/Cowboys, RedSox/Yankees “cheer for a giant meteor to obliterate the stadium” game.
O well. At least this will be the only Colts/Patriots game this season.
We’ll see you then thank you *bats eyelashes at bob sanders*
Nice of Moss to give his fantasy owners a parting fumble.
Such a giver.
Joe Biden thinks Cassel is failing this test.
Oh boy, New England gets to chuck one more deep ball! Can’t wait to see Randy Moss half-heartedly jump for it.
Treehouse of Horror, y’all!!! good night
That’s how I completed that word pattern, too, Foxxy.
obama. mccain. boomer. vomiting.
i just saw the obama-rev. wright ad for the first time. the stench of desperation has infected my bedroom
Did we mention he’s untested?
I have been concerned he’s a carrier for Hep-C.
Not very nice of Jerry O’Connell to draw that critical personal foul penalty
Lucas Oil Stadium … about as charming as an oil rig
Hmmm, now I’ve got Frank Caliendo pitching Dish Network.
I think I’d prefer another round of ads warning me to protect my daughter from the scourge of Mandingobama.
That Cassel is a gunslinger
This game is confusing. I could have sworn Baltimore and Cleveland was a 1 p.m. game.
Did we mention he’s untested?
I like how they bleep God bless AND God damn America
He belonged to a scary Negro church with an angry Negro preacher.
Is this true? I’m pretty sure I would’ve heard something about it before now.
The McCain “I’m fucked” ads should be running by tomorrow
All day, Otto.
@Otto: I’m getting, ‘too radical, too risky, too black’ what’s yours?
@Otto: He’s UNTESTED! Hide the children!
Somewhere, Eli just groaned “Mommmm, they keep calling me ‘Peyton’s little brother!’”
Anyone else getting the Republican ads about how Obama is a Scary Black Man?
They. Are. ADORABLE!
God bless you, Ape.
I’m surprised he didn’t launch Mar Har into the upper deck when he plopped down.
wow. that’s gotta be testing the tensile strength of aluminum.
There you go, Otto.
“Pour down the middle, releasing all the flavor.”
So that’s where it went
Now that’s the Jabar Gaffney we all know and loathe.
Can we get a still image of the morbidly obese Colts coach sitting on the bench?
I’m pretty sure he thinks he’s in the handicapped stall.
Trick-or-treating Manning kid is hanging out with the refs! That’s gotta be against league rules.
I sincerely hope that that was live footage.
Inflatable Horse Man is pleased with that touchdown pass.
OH HI pr0FF3ss0r! YOUR NAME IS FUNNY.
Watching Peyton Manning is like RED 18! BLUE SIDE SCATBACK! ALBATROSS! ALBATROSS! which is why Belichick gives me the creeps.
He, Marmalard and Farnsworth should hang out sometime. Maybe go out for malts and cruise the town for girls.
Is Ben becoming a little pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth? Not that that’s a problem.
PEW PEW PEW
BEN STOP PLAYING CALL OF DUTY WHEN NEW GEARS OF WAR COMES OUT. MAYBE I GET IN LINE AT GAMESTOP AFTER MONDAY NIGHT THING.
I’m sorry, did Dan just suggest that Orton needs a designated driver? Methinks the man may know something of neckbeard’s “rehab” after all…
yuge
welkah
FACK YOU DAHHHHKIE!
Seriously. I’m right here. I play receiver. I’m awesome.
/threadjack
Kyle Orton has a high ankle sprain. He’s out for a month.
Your move, Aaron Rodgers.
/threadjack
God must be punishing me because Cassel refuses to pass it to Welker.
Hi, I’m Randy Moss. Remember me?
Loogit genius Belichick stealing from Tony Sparano.
There is nothing manufactured about my loathing of the Patriots.
Broncos! Browns!
The tragedy of preseason scheduling strike NFL Network
As a Colts fan I must say this: I do not miss Vanderjacked and his week legged kickoffs to the 20. Vinatieri has a Sex Cannon of a leg. Now we have to get people to actually cover the kickoff.
And Bob Sanders misses the tackle? WTF?
sure you did
well I knew that I they were familiar. thanks.
They’re sounds from Der Kommissar Herr Goodell’s German Techo-Fatty Porn DVD.
are those sounds from an Intellevision football game from 1983?
Which kind of watery, generic beer is better, the drinkable kind or the cold kind?
Harrison retunring punts?
Because I benched him over Pennington Cassel will blow up onight!
Also, PeyPey is due for a monster. The fucking cretin.
Vince Wilfork isn’t fat, he’s big-boned. And a dirty, dirty, heavenly bastard.
/totally in the tank for Wilfork until he gets a max offer from some other team. Probably the Redskins in the upcoming uncapped year.
Would you get on a plane with a pilot who has never flown? Would you trust your child with someone who has never cared for children? Would you go under with a surgeon who has never operated?
Matt Cassell: Untested.