Colts! Patriots! Mostly Not Appearing in This Game!

Oh sure, Tom Brady, Laurence Maroney and Rodney Harrison are out for the year. And Reggie Wayne and Joseph Addai might not play. But Bob Sanders is making his return (at least until he gets hurt again sometime in the third quarter). It’s almost the same game it was last year, except neither team is coming in undefeated. Actually the Colts are playing for their playoff lives. But it’s the Colts and the Patriots. That means very real overhyped animosity! None of that media manufactured stuff. You just know BenJarvus Green-Ellis and Chad Simpson hate each other with the tight-fisted fury of a hundred political operatives.
I have to say I’m not buying the story of the wife-submitted DVD with the alternate camera angle that saved Vince Wilfork, the Patriots heir apparent to the Rodney Harrison cheap shot throne, from getting suspended. How is she getting access to that game tape? Was she the videographer after Matt Walsh left the team? Maybe she knows Goodell likes fattie porn and THAT’S what was on the disc.

Speaking of fatties, here, per the demands of commenter Otto Man, is the shot of a be-FUPAed Colts coach looking as though he’s in the handicap stall. Did Charlie Weis make the short trip for the game?
Tags: open thread, these assholes again?, xmas ape








November 2nd, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Would you get on a plane with a pilot who has never flown? Would you trust your child with someone who has never cared for children? Would you go under with a surgeon who has never operated?
Matt Cassell: Untested.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Vince Wilfork isn’t fat, he’s big-boned. And a dirty, dirty, heavenly bastard.
/totally in the tank for Wilfork until he gets a max offer from some other team. Probably the Redskins in the upcoming uncapped year.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:24 pm
Also, PeyPey is due for a monster. The fucking cretin.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:29 pm
Because I benched him over Pennington Cassel will blow up onight!
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:29 pm
Harrison retunring punts?
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Which kind of watery, generic beer is better, the drinkable kind or the cold kind?
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:36 pm
are those sounds from an Intellevision football game from 1983?
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:40 pm
They’re sounds from Der Kommissar Herr Goodell’s German Techo-Fatty Porn DVD.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:41 pm
well I knew that I they were familiar. thanks.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:46 pm
sure you did
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:49 pm
As a Colts fan I must say this: I do not miss Vanderjacked and his week legged kickoffs to the 20. Vinatieri has a Sex Cannon of a leg. Now we have to get people to actually cover the kickoff.
And Bob Sanders misses the tackle? WTF?
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:52 pm
Broncos! Browns!
The tragedy of preseason scheduling strike NFL Network
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:53 pm
There is nothing manufactured about my loathing of the Patriots.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Loogit genius Belichick stealing from Tony Sparano.
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Hi, I’m Randy Moss. Remember me?
November 2nd, 2008 at 9:58 pm
God must be punishing me because Cassel refuses to pass it to Welker.
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:09 pm
/threadjack
Kyle Orton has a high ankle sprain. He’s out for a month.
Your move, Aaron Rodgers.
/threadjack
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Seriously. I’m right here. I play receiver. I’m awesome.
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:19 pm
FACK YOU DAHHHHKIE!
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:21 pm
welkah
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:26 pm
yuge
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:41 pm
I’m sorry, did Dan just suggest that Orton needs a designated driver? Methinks the man may know something of neckbeard’s “rehab” after all…
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:52 pm
PEW PEW PEW
BEN STOP PLAYING CALL OF DUTY WHEN NEW GEARS OF WAR COMES OUT. MAYBE I GET IN LINE AT GAMESTOP AFTER MONDAY NIGHT THING.
November 2nd, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Is Ben becoming a little pr0FF3ss0r_F4rnsw0rth? Not that that’s a problem.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:09 pm
He, Marmalard and Farnsworth should hang out sometime. Maybe go out for malts and cruise the town for girls.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:13 pm
Watching Peyton Manning is like RED 18! BLUE SIDE SCATBACK! ALBATROSS! ALBATROSS! which is why Belichick gives me the creeps.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:14 pm
OH HI pr0FF3ss0r! YOUR NAME IS FUNNY.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:15 pm
Inflatable Horse Man is pleased with that touchdown pass.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:18 pm
I sincerely hope that that was live footage.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:18 pm
Trick-or-treating Manning kid is hanging out with the refs! That’s gotta be against league rules.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:21 pm
Can we get a still image of the morbidly obese Colts coach sitting on the bench?
I’m pretty sure he thinks he’s in the handicapped stall.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Now that’s the Jabar Gaffney we all know and loathe.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:33 pm
“Pour down the middle, releasing all the flavor.”
So that’s where it went
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:33 pm
There you go, Otto.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:37 pm
wow. that’s gotta be testing the tensile strength of aluminum.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:40 pm
God bless you, Ape.
I’m surprised he didn’t launch Mar Har into the upper deck when he plopped down.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Anyone else getting the Republican ads about how Obama is a Scary Black Man?
They. Are. ADORABLE!
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:45 pm
Somewhere, Eli just groaned “Mommmm, they keep calling me ‘Peyton’s little brother!’”
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:47 pm
@Otto: He’s UNTESTED! Hide the children!
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:47 pm
@Otto: I’m getting, ‘too radical, too risky, too black’ what’s yours?
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:47 pm
All day, Otto.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:49 pm
The McCain “I’m fucked” ads should be running by tomorrow
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:50 pm
He belonged to a scary Negro church with an angry Negro preacher.
Is this true? I’m pretty sure I would’ve heard something about it before now.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:50 pm
I like how they bleep God bless AND God damn America
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:51 pm
Did we mention he’s untested?
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:51 pm
This game is confusing. I could have sworn Baltimore and Cleveland was a 1 p.m. game.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:51 pm
That Cassel is a gunslinger
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Hmmm, now I’ve got Frank Caliendo pitching Dish Network.
I think I’d prefer another round of ads warning me to protect my daughter from the scourge of Mandingobama.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:54 pm
Lucas Oil Stadium … about as charming as an oil rig
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:55 pm
Not very nice of Jerry O’Connell to draw that critical personal foul penalty
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:55 pm
Did we mention he’s untested?
I have been concerned he’s a carrier for Hep-C.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:56 pm
i just saw the obama-rev. wright ad for the first time. the stench of desperation has infected my bedroom
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:58 pm
obama. mccain. boomer. vomiting.
November 2nd, 2008 at 11:59 pm
That’s how I completed that word pattern, too, Foxxy.
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:00 am
Treehouse of Horror, y’all!!! good night
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:01 am
Oh boy, New England gets to chuck one more deep ball! Can’t wait to see Randy Moss half-heartedly jump for it.
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:03 am
Joe Biden thinks Cassel is failing this test.
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:04 am
Nice of Moss to give his fantasy owners a parting fumble.
Such a giver.
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:09 am
We’ll see you then thank you *bats eyelashes at bob sanders*
November 3rd, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Colts vs. Patriots. The AFC version of the Redskins/Cowboys, RedSox/Yankees “cheer for a giant meteor to obliterate the stadium” game.
O well. At least this will be the only Colts/Patriots game this season.