What we’ve learned so far today:
Jeff Fisher should have spent more time working on his defensive game-plan and less time playing paratrooper.
Donovan McNabb got benched after two picks and a fumble, providing time for him to brush up on the finer points of the rulebook.
Chilly Chill cockblocks Adrian Peterson fantasy owners with Chester Taylor near the goal line.
Joey Porter is your huckleberry and the Patriots are a bunch of cheaters….
[ as always, Xmas Ape comes through with the screen grabs & video ]
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Hi,
I’m new to the forum and just saying hello.
The king of the gods is Zeus? I don’t have time for Greek mythology.
@Jewish Genes: It could really happen. Denver has to play the Jets, Bills, Panthers, Chiefs, and Marmalard. There’s definitely four potential losses in there. Wouldn’t it be amazing if that happens and Belichick misses the playoffs?
@most_impressive: No apologies necessary, dude. Let’s call a truce.
@Devine: “Broadcasting live from the Spruce Goose…”
Sorry. I thought we were riffing.
Ahah ahhhahhahha ahhahaha
@Devine & Ape:
Hopefully at halftime of the Super Bowl featuring Bruce Springsteen.
“I’ma fix yo mouf in the praya circle!”
There’s still time to recoup, everybody! Take the Bolts to cover!
@Ape: And when they integrate the comedy stylings of crowd-pleasing African American comic Bruce Bruce.
Why is it that Lee Evans has his only halfway decent game each year (since the year he was on my team that is) against me, playing for the guy who hasn’t changed his lineup since the draft.
Just wait until Duce Staley joins them next season. In a sweatshirt, of course.
Wait a second — just thought this one through (forgive me for being slow on the uptake). Did Fox really just put Johnston and Siragusa together so the PBP guy can say, “For Moose and Goose…”?
@Jay: I was all ready to boo you for jeering Eli, but then I learned to read. My mistake was understandable, though; it’s so rare that anyone cheers him.
So far this week:
Jeers to Trent Edwards, for bending the anthropomorphic personification of the Chiefs over the nearest railing and raping it hard (all while being benched).
Cheers to Ed Reed.
More cheers to Ed Reed, this time as part of the defensive unit.
Jeers to my receiving corps, as the four of them have combined for four points. At least Plax has the excuse of being hurt – where the fuck is Tony Scheffler’s excuse?
Cheers to Sheli. My opponent has to have Ryan Grant score 23 points alone to win and hope that neither Kaeding nor Addai do anything
Sadly, the team itself will only be 6-6 with a win, so it is completely pointless to care about anything at this point.
Siragusa couldn’t wait to start talking food. “My wife has already started cooking for Thanksgiving.”
Former butterfingers Madison Hedgecock is on point today.
bad news if you’re going against Michael Turner. 100+ yards, 4 touchdowns.
My editor is a Raiders fan — tomorrow’s going to be the best production day evar
Wait I thought if the spread wasn’t covered we just got to go back out there and play until a winner was decided…no one told me otherwise.
Did I know I lost the bet?
No, no I never read that part of the rules.
Please Lord Jebus of the Cosmos, let us have a 7-9 division winner.
Redskins fumble, damn you gambling gods
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo!
Dude, didn’t Domenik Hixon used to suck? When did he become a savvy and talented football player?
WOW. Did Kevin Boss fuck Elisha’s wife or something? That throw couldn’t have set him up any better.
Well, I think we have our KTFO of the day.
Nice toss, Churchy.
@Ape: When you say “we,” does that include the KSKwitters from last Monday?
I will say that we’re going to try to live blog every playoff game this year.*
*May be making too much work for himself
The same way I don’t understand how Derrick Mason doesn’t get doubled on every Ravens passing down, I don’t know how the same doesn’t apply to Steve Smith when the Giants have a 3rd down
Matt Ryan doesn’t get the join this week’s white QB TD rushing club
You know what? I really don’t think Ross’ penalties have been all that horrible today — they’ve pretty much all been at the service of preventing clean releases that could lead to explosive plays by these receivers. Yeah, I’d prefer he was good enough to go stride for stride and just blanket Fitzgerald or Boldin, but there aren’t a whole lotta DBs that can do that.
Broncos “defense” making the Raiders offense look like…well, offense.
His name is Pete Morelli, Goose, and he’s as bad at his job as you are at yours.
“I like the way Morelli goes and referees these games”
Thanks guys, I fell asleep during the catastrophe of a third quarter in Philly game. I believe there were 62 yards gained when I went down. Reading the open threads caught me up!
Thanks, Ape. Wanted to jump in on that, but wasn’t sure if I was seeing that through homerism-colored lenses.
What a bullshit late hit call.
Correction: A valid PI call.
No live blog tonight. Another open thread for the SNF game is coming though. It’s just like a live blog, only with fewer polls and Grimey LOLJocks photos.
Fox Sports cameraman Darren (who got tackled) > ESPN sideline princess Erin Andrews.
does that make Dick Enberg Mr. Green Jeans or Mr. Moose?
OK, so I’m having a solid day in FFB today with 70+ points and Rodgers and Jennings going tomorrow. Why do I run into the buzzsaw today going against a team that currently has 129+ points with one plus quarter of football remaining? God I hate my life right now.
Siragusa is ready for war down there
So, 4 of the 5 pages of tomorrow’s MMQB will be about how the Jets are the best team in football, right?
Randy Cross is slowly evolving into Captain Kangaroo.
I can’t believe Hedgecock held on — I screamed “DON’T THROW IT TO STONE HANDS” like Robert Loggia in “Necessary Roughness.”
huh, the Panthers actually pulled off the draw play on third and long. Mike Holmgren doesn’t understand why that doesn’t work for him every third and long.
Kinda surprised that his go-go Gadget gloves didn’t hang onto the ball.
Wow 32min 11sec before our first Warner Fumble
Do we have a Liveblog: Marmalard Edition coming tonight?
I’m starting Rackers in fantasy (thanks for the missed XP, asshole). How many additional points would I have gotten for 68 yards?
@robocats: For $1,000, you should get to climax. Just saying.
I don’t even think you can call that a fail. Making fun of Rackers for not hitting that kick would be like blaming a 94-year-old woman for being a bad lay. Neither should ever have been in that position in the first place.
I’ll take anticlimax for 1000, Alex.
I want those 10 minutes of my life back, Wisenhunt, you fucker.
Rackers attempting the Janikowski Special
Giants FINALLY starting to get a rush again. Welcome back, fellas. It’s been too long.
I wonder if they’ll fire Mike Shanahan before I die.
@DavidtheUnderpantsGnome: I made through 1:15 — they should have hired the Blizzard Man.
Sometimes I hate Youtube, and the internet in general.
http://www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com/2008/11/latest-cut-from-some-group-youve-never.html
Dude, Domenik Hixon is all the Giants have going right now. They’ll wind up trying a 50-yarder.
@Seisto: I’d have thought it lead to this:
http://deadspin.com/338115/the-nfl-in-short-easy-bursts
Jamarcus Russell is 6/6, leading to this
http://i177.photobucket.com/albums/w205/bradcymru/aldavis.jpg
figures Hightower gets a TD as soon as I bench him
Are we still doing Jehrehmeh jokes, or no?
Wow. Cleatus with an electric guitar is so awkward that it makes Lil Wayne with an electric guitar look natural.
I’m sorry, did I just see a McD’s commercial that highlighted something called “Nuggnutts?”
@porky1: Thanks for the image of Siragusa taking a Herculean shit on Thursday morning. If I may: Imagine him also drinking some Ipecac shortly before ascending the throne, just to make sure that absolutely nothing’s left in there.
Sirgusa will spend Tuesday stuffing himself with high-fiber bread to stretch his stomach, will spend Wednesday on a liquid diet plus Metamucil. Thursday morning at 10 am he’ll clear out the pipes and prepare for SuperFeast. That Sarah Palin turkey interview got him especially hyped and hungry for this year.
Amazing that Siragusa is at a game today, what with it being holy week and all for fatties. You’d think he’d be at home priming his pump for Thursday by drinking peanut oil.
The Giants should hire 289 to do their design work … the T-shirt Jacobs is wearing fucking sucks
Siragusa tells us that Ralph Brown did a nice job on that Giants blitz up the middle. Except Ralph Brown is on the Cardinals, and #20 in white is Michael Johnson. And that Siragusa shouldn’t be talking, at all.
Great- looks like Bad Eli is showing up today.
@Slothrop: Wondrous. I’m now stuck watching local car commercials after leaving Philly/Baltimore which is totally cool since I’ve already missed half of the first quarter. Oh, and the Cardinals scored! Fantastic.
@Devine: Fox did the same with Dallas/SF before going to Atlanta. not to worry, as the Falcons only went on a scoring drive to open the game.
Hey, Fox? Baltimore’s up 29 points with 2 minutes to go. Let’s go to the start of Giants/Cards, huh?
I haven’t been happy with how Romeo has coached the Browns, but I will say that he made a smart move subbing in Derek Anderson for Brady Quinn. If anything, he kept the Dawg Pound off Brady’s ass by letting Anderson turn in a performance even more pitiful than Quinn’s, despite the use of all his fingers.
I do believe that that last TD might’ve fixed Joey’s mouf for today.