In these times of financial peril getting your pay docked to the tune of $117,000 is enough to make anyone reassess their spending. But Plaxico Burress is handling his recently suspension and attendant fine quite well, thank you. See, Plax had planned on going to Mike Strahan’s Halloween rager wearing a badass custom-made Iron Man costume that cost ten grand. But after those fucking Nazi queers Reese and Coughlin decided to shit on his rights as a parent, that idea seemed a tad profligate. But did that deter noble, Plax? Of course not!
Necessity being the mother of invention, Plax looked around and found a more frugal, yet just as awesome, costume alternative. Perhaps you saw him modeling it during warm-ups Monday night. Looking good Plaxberg!
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He can catch Patches? My dog? She’s been gone for weeks! Huzzah!
Plaxico Burress may not be the classiest guy in the NFL but he can catch patches and that’s what matters. He’s going to be issued on the sports stock trading site http://www.OneSeason.com in the next week or so. If he keeps putting up big numbers, his share price is going to shoot through the roof.
Once again, the conservative sandwich-heavy portfolio pays off for the hungry investor!
Plax has hand on his helmet? i though tyree was the one that caught shit with his head
Good lord, that brings a whole new meaning to the phrase; “bad MS Paint.”
@Favre’s Next Interception: Nice drinkability reference. I want to get picked to do one of those commercials. If that one dorky guy can do it then why can’t I?
You must have been under some serious pressure to get this post out. It’s very close to unreadable. Maybe if I got as high as you were when you wrote it, it would be more readable. You are not the Bud Light of bloggers!
For the record, I am now saving up for my own custom-made Iron Man costume. It may boil down to “Custom made Iron Man costume” vs. “Down payment on a house”.
And yes, I am 100% serious.
@dAndy
affirmative action ruins everything
“Hooray now Zoidberg is popular”
“Why yes lets all talk to Zoidberg”
I just can’t help but notice that there is a white girl pictured in the add over there to the right for that Queen Latifa movie. What the fuck is this world coming too?
I wish I had the kind of job that paid me so much I could shrug off being docked 117 grand. Must be nice. “Family issues.” I think that means Plaxico had to choke a bitch. That’s what it means in my family, anyway.
Of course the week after I break down and buy The Beast with a Billion Backs I see the commercial for it’s premiere on Comedy Central this Sunday.
All I’m saying is that if I had actual hands under my chin, like Plax is sporting here, I could feed myself chips and guacamole while holding a beer and changing the channel at the same time.
And I’m his friend, Jesus!
Gumbercules? I love that guy!
Who the hell does the editing around here? I thought I was reading another one of Emmitt’s soliloquys.
Put down the hooch flubster, it’s way to early to start drinking.
I’m not saying coach Coughlin is old, but if you consider his age, he’s likely to die soon.
Dr. Zoidberg: I want the tactile pleasure in cutting him here
[pointing at Fry's neck]
in the gonads.
Fry: Shhhhhh. Nobody correct him.