Football, Internet Porn and Ice Cream Sandwiches!

I’ve come down with the weekend-long change of weather sickness, which blows raccoons. But at least it gives me a free pass to do nothing but take in the entirety of the Sunday slate. What do we have in store in the early games? Marveling at the Old Bay bitches in their Unitas jerseys let out a good Bawlmer bawl as the Ravens drop one to the Indianapolis Irsays. Maybe the Texans countering the Dolphins with a Wildcat formation of their own? Anything to kep the ball out of Sage’s hands. Kyle Orton and Matt Ryan squaring off in a semi-consequential game? Wow, I need to go lay back down.
Of course, what’s a sickly Lazy Sunday without ice cream sammies and Internet pr0n? No Lazy Sunday at all, that’s what.
Tags: good luck getting more black people at notre dame, open thread








October 12th, 2008 at 10:33 am
http://mrchicity.com/
October 12th, 2008 at 10:33 am
HOW ‘BOUT THEM TARHEELS?!?
*crickets*
October 12th, 2008 at 10:36 am
There’s only one game on today as far as I’m concerned. I haven’t shaved all weekend in support of the lion-maned one.
October 12th, 2008 at 10:53 am
HOLY JESUS CHICK ON THE RIGHT!!!
October 12th, 2008 at 11:03 am
If our trio of lovelies were horses the would be, from left to right, Lipizzaner philly, Clydesdale philly, and American Quarterhorse philly.
YEEEEHAWWW I AM FUCKIN RIDIN’EM’ALLLLLLLLL!! WOOTWOOT!
October 12th, 2008 at 11:10 am
Hey Ape, can we have a PoFlaWa? Please?
/waiting for the puck to drop
October 12th, 2008 at 11:26 am
i couldn’t understand a word of that video.
needs subtitles/translation.
October 12th, 2008 at 11:34 am
Bad: I have to go to work today
Better: I work for MLB, and there won’t be shit to do until it’s time for me to leave
Best: This means I can sit around and get paid to watch a REAL sport
October 12th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
I, too, have come down with my semi-annual season-change sinus infection. I feel like a bag of shit. Like, literally, a leather satchel filled with some guy’s shit.
Plus side: I’ve done nothing all weekend but watch sports and eat fruit cocktail.
October 12th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
Cris Carter just called Irvin a strong leader for the old Cowboys. I guess strength = follow me or get stabbed in the neck.
October 12th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
@Robut M. Nixon
you said cock.
October 12th, 2008 at 12:56 pm
Count me among the congested ranks. Fuck fall. It’s just the taint between the nice seasons.
Also, “good luck getting more black people at Notre Dame” tag is fucking hysterical.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
Joe Flacco gets picked on Baltimore’s opening drive.
I love the Ravens sometimes.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Favre sacked and fumbles for touchdown. God I’m glad he’s doing that for a different team than the Packers.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Matt Ryan goes 5 for 5 but only gets three points on opening drive. So here comes the Neckbeard.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Watching Colts / Ravens. Why didn’t Indy learn from the hole in Texas Stadium’s roof? That bright sunlight reflecting of the field is fucking with my hangover…bitches!
/bitching
October 12th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
RAWR
The Wildcat strikes again!
October 12th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Mar Har!
October 12th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
apparently all the early games are so shitty that my local fox affiliate has decided their time would be better-spent showing a paid advertisement for knicks tickets. now how the fuck am i supposed to compulsively channel-surf between games when i get pissed at favre?
/wait, touchdown? could a jets-bengals game actually be interesting?
//nah, false alarm. think i’ll nap for the next three hours.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
No, No, No
October 12th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
Matt Ryan is 7/7, all off his back foot, I believe
October 12th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Matt Ryan is winning the honor du-al with the Bears.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
Hey, remember when the Ravens were 2-0 and in first place in the AFC North?
October 12th, 2008 at 1:36 pm
Goddammit, Carolina…
Downside to watching football at work: I have to watch football sober
October 12th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Hey, remember when I started the Ravens D cuz the Colts suck?
please not a third week with a D/ST that gives me negative points and loses my game!!!
FUUUCK
October 12th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
Orton almost just Cumslinged ™
October 12th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
@David: Would that be Cumslung?
October 12th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
The Colts have forced not one, but two turnovers? That can’t be right…..
Also calling in to work today was the best decision I’ve made in a long time.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Why the hell is Green in there when Slaton is averageing 5 yards a pop?
October 12th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
@Baby: It might have, but since it’s Cumsling ™ , I believe the registered trademark makes the verbification of the proper noun kosher.
October 12th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Drew must have quite the stiffy with the Vikings up a safety on the Lions.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
listening to brian baldinger is like listening to your pet being beaten with a burlap sack filled with dildos and wrenches
October 12th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
I’m thinking Drew has a Red Rocket of Fury(tm) over Dr. Z picking (thus cursing) the Vikes to win the Superbowl.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/writers/dr_z/06/20/vikings/1.html
October 12th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Jesus. This is the shittiest slate of 1:00 games I have ever seen.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:19 pm
3-2 game in Minnesota, I’d just murder myself if I had to watch that.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
They should at least commit honorable suicide
/lends katana to all residents of Detroit and Minny
October 12th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Mar Har is making me smire today.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Can I just have the hott on the right?
And once again, the Saints get screwed over by the refs who refuse to call TO with 1 second left in the half.
Oh and it’s a comedy of errors in the kicking game. Melhaff: 1 out of 2. Janikowsky: 0 of 2 and not even close.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Who wants Tony Gonzalez?
October 12th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Anybody have brad childress’ address? I’ve got all this gasoline sitting here, and his house is made of a bunch of wood, soooooo……………..
October 12th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Seriously though, are any of those chicks in pr0n?
Any of you degenerates know their names?
On a related note, when you’re playing a drinking game where you have to give examples of a category, it’s apparently creepy when you supply everyone else with porn star names. Whowouldhavethunkit?
October 12th, 2008 at 2:43 pm
I’m all over the one on the left.
Also, are the Ravens that bad, or are the Colts that good? The Lube has been a House of Horrors for the Horse, but this is unbelievable. Up 24-0 at the half? The Ravens have run 3! plays in Colts territory, whereas the Colts have run 17! in Ravens territory? 3 lost fumbles, and 2 more?
As a blatant Colts homer, I’m watching this and wondering if the rest of the AFC is shitting their pants.
October 12th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
Just random observations concerning young QB’s: Matty Ryan=good: Flacid Flacco=not good: Discuss.
/obvious
October 12th, 2008 at 2:51 pm
first team to the endzone wins in atlanta. we may be here for a while…
October 12th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
As a blatant Colts homer, I’m watching this and wondering if the rest of the AFC is shitting their pants.
No.
October 12th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
As a blatant Colts homer, I must ask: the Colts are up 31-0 over the Ravens, who have crossed the 50 three times and have given up 5 fumbles and 2 sacks in the first half.
Rest of the AFC: shitting their pants, or waiting to see what happens before shitting their pants, since New England and San Diego both suck fat donkey cock?
October 12th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
I’m waiting for the inevitable South Park/Ronnie Brown “HE TERK MAH JERB!” post.
October 12th, 2008 at 3:15 pm
I will have all of you know that the Colts/Ravens game is now 31-3 so… take that.
/pathetic.
October 12th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
The Redskins are really down huh……
October 12th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
WTF? Brian Finneran is still playing football?
Good for him.
October 12th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
Brilliant move by Al Davis. Hard to believe that as recently as a week ago the Raiders’ season looked like a lost cause.
October 12th, 2008 at 3:27 pm
And CBS has switched my Saints game for something more “competitive”. Thank you CBS for screwing me over. I don’t give a rat’s ass about Favraro and the Jets. Put back the slaughtering of the Raiders!
BTW, I’m noticing that no one’s selected the blonde. No one wants to ride that pony?
October 12th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
I too noticed shyness toward the Clydesdale blond…pussies!
Ima down wid it! Woot Woot!
October 12th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
I gotta go with the chick on the left too…the blonde is merely acceptable…and the chick on the right gives me the creeps as she had some dude like qualities…look at her closely…and you’ll see what i mean! It doesn’t mak-ah me a smirre wery much.!
October 12th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
Kyle Orton- Kaptain Komeback!
/Remembers 2005- still not a believer
October 12th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
OK, I really hope that the Falcons’ looooong 3rd qtr. TD drive after the Bears closed the gap to 12-10 and the 30-yd pass to Jenkins to put the Falcons in FG range with 1 DAMN SECOND left, finally and officially ends the national media myth of the “great” Bears defense. Seriously. The Bears D is mediocre-to-good AT BEST, and no one will admit it.
October 12th, 2008 at 4:10 pm
Jason Elam – Captain Sumthin?
October 12th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Brunette on Left = 1
Blonde in Center = 1
Psycho Brunette on Right = 0
October 12th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
Actually Kyle Orton when you include my vote for the chick on the left, then it’d be:
Brunette on Left = 3
Blonde in Center = 1
Psycho Brunette on Right = 1
October 12th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Sheman,
My “1’s and “0’s” were playing on the saying that the “1-10″ scale for women is usless. There’s only “1″ (I’d hit it) or “0″ (no thanks)
Examples:
Jessica Alba = 1
Roseanne Barr = 0
Sarah Palin = 1
Nancy Pelosi = 0
Campbell Brown = 1
Greta Van Susteren = 0
October 12th, 2008 at 6:27 pm
Left and blonde, yes and yes. Psycho on right smokes crack while shooting heroin and forgets to eat, eewww.
October 13th, 2008 at 11:16 am
Yes, Yes, and Yes.
Hey, you could live in Buffalo and not even get CBS on cable anymore because LIN pulled it from Time Warner.