
I was only fifteen when I first fell in love. His name was Danny and he lived three doors down the street from me. Danny would always walk me home from school. I knew that he liked me but I decided to be coy until he asked me out. When the homecoming dance came around, I really wanted him to ask me, but I knew other girls would be asking him, too. But then one day, on one of our walks home, he asked me, “Can I call you tonight? I need to talk to you about something.” That’s when I knew.
Our families met at Danny’s house for homecoming. I’d seen his mom lots of times, but this was the first time I’d met Danny’s dad. I remember he had big hands and he looked younger than his age. While my mom was showing off our family photo album, I took Danny’s dad in my mouth in the laundry room while I stuck a finger up his ass. He wouldn’t let me swallow his…you know…but that was probably a good idea. I can still remember the scent of his balls. My God, he was such a man. But then he slapped me in the face and yelled at me to go upstairs, which is where I probably should have been all along.
Danny and I had a great time at the dance. That helped me forget about that stupid thing I did beforehand. After the dance, we went to a party and Danny had too much to drink. I was only drinking Pepsi that night, so I took Danny’s keys and drove him home. His dad was waiting in the living room, and after he put Danny to bed, we 69′ed under the coffee table as quietly as we could. I remember seeing one of his wife’s slippers in the corner of the room while he was slurping out my little gash. What a lucky woman she was, I thought to myself.
We were tender and gentle for an hour, but then he suddenly threw me out. I cried all the way home. What had I done wrong? I sobbed quietly in the shower; I didn’t want my parents to hear me. How would I explain myself? But what I didn’t realize was that Danny woke up in the middle of the night and snuck out of his bedroom window to see me. I had just showered and picked up my Reader’s Digest when I heard him outside. He was the only person I wanted to see! I let him in through the front door and that’s when he kissed me. I took him upstairs and we held each other in bed. He kissed me some more, and that’s when we went all the way. It was so innocent. It was wonderful. I wouldn’t have had it any other way. It really was perfect.
The next weekend, I totally let his dad fuck me doggystyle in the garage. Hey, what was I supposed to do? That man was huge!


Man…I thought I was her first!
First impressions of KSK, WTF? Ok count me in.
I love this site
I’m pretty sure “Carissa” is illegal in most states, but damn do I not give a shit.
http://www.3wishes.com/bride.asp
I’m pretty sure I saw Danny butt-fucking his Dad later that morning…. and by “pretty sure” I mean
Holy Jesus my ass hurts” and by “butt-fucking” I mean “Holy Jesus my ass REALLY fucking hurts”..
Signed,
Danny Dad
15 years is a lot of time sitting around on my ass. i don’t have all day
@ dAndy ManCandy
the ‘Brady Quinn is gay’ joke never gets old. NEVER.
This whole page is ROFL
@Mark from Calgary Says:
This was a twist I did not see coming…
Neither did she.
@Gino:
http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/155210/?tag=Randy
I can’t wait till my kid starts bringing cheerleaders home. I’m changing his name to Danny and practicing my gash slurping technique in the meantime. Oh, and door number 3.
This is how I ended up with Sarah Palin as my VP… except for us it involved a hockey stick.
My butt-hole is still sore.
:(
Wow… just complete and utter disbelief.
It seemed like a nice story, until I was slapped in the face with “I took Danny’s dad in my mouth in the laundry room while I stuck a finger up his ass.”
That was a twist I did not see coming…
@Punch – ILika, I believe.
I want to know where you get a coffee table tall enough to 69 under.
Dorothy’s looking hot, but what’s with that dude in the nurse’s uniform? Guys who dress up like women on Halloween aren’t funny they’re creepy.
At least it was a chick yelling at you.
Yep, I down with the 3wishes site as well. That would be a great site to buy your lady friend (or man friend for all you Brady Quinn folk out there) a giftcard from. Schawing!
At least you could get it up.
Is nice when you can cherish the memories.
Some of us are only left vaguely recollecting some chick yelling at us for being drunk and finishing too quickly.
Not that this happened to me.
@ Ben
Big score on the 3wishes link. Osama bin Laden would buy the Liv Openly costume for his camel if he could get wi-fi in his cave.
I hope my dead family members weren’t watching me as a read this post.
I wish I had Danny’s dad’s game. He can even quietly 69!
I did her like this. I did her like that. I did her with a wiffle ball bat. Soooooooooooooo!!
reads eerily like my own first time.
Ah, young love.
She’s the Four Star Pinup, here:
http://www.3wishes.com/military.asp
I know this because after she saw a Halloween game last year, my girlfriend, who has 3wishes as a permanent bookmark, explained that all NFL cheerleaders get their gear from that site. I kid you not. Sexy Harry Potter Chick is on there, too.
This, by the way, is why Osama hates us.
Punter, I would really appreciate if you kept your personal experiences off of this site.
What exactly is the costume of the one on the right? Is she a “sexy military dictator”?
@ Ben: Nah, Courtnee’s dad is cool.
You guys are totally going to get sued doing this, eventually.
+1 stealofthedraft
The retarded spelling of the name Courtney was a nice touch.
Where’s the “jeez punter that’s just right” tag?
This is exactly how my first time went! Except Danny was named Todd and there was a hockey stick involved.
I GOT A BOOM BOOM
We were tender and gentile for an hour
Antisemite!
Wow. KSK meets Penthouse Forum. When worlds collide.
So, how’s that KSK Suicide Pool coming along?