Breaking: Another suspension. Adam is dead, long live Pacman!
Well that didn’t take long. Jerry Jones’ enabling and Wade Phillips’ denials notwithstanding, Pacman Jones has been suspended indefinitely by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. According to Michael David Smith, the suspension will be for at least four games. Dallas’ ambitious social experiment lasted a whopping six games.
Apparently, Jones violated the terms of his reinstatement on the night when he is alleged to have gotten into a fight with his own babysitter. But it may have been his imbibing, rather than his belligerence, that got him crossways with the Commish.
“Looks like somebody forgot there’s a rule against alcoholic beverages in fraternities on probation.”
Tags: Pacman Jones, that team is headed for an implosion, TNA comeback AHOY!!!, Wade picked a bad week to quit mainlining gravy
October 14th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=–_-88xEQBg
October 14th, 2008 at 3:11 pm
Kinda related, kinda not: A chick I work with saw Jessica Simpson at a tanning place today (in Irving) and reports that she looked like shit (Jessica, that is). Hair unbrushed, still had on last night’s makeup, raggedy-ass clothes. Coincidence? I don’t think so…
October 14th, 2008 at 3:12 pm
DON’T FUCK WITH THE BABYSITTER.
/brandishes gun at the Lords of Hell
October 14th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Looks like another candidate for the 12 step program at Stupid Mother Fuckers Annonymous.
October 14th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
He can’t do that to our pledges.
Only we can do that to our pledges
October 14th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
A man cannot change who he is.
October 14th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
ahhhh this eases the pain of losing the rams just a little bit more…
October 14th, 2008 at 3:24 pm
Commissioner Goodell=Dean Wormer
October 14th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Based on what that uberdouche, Deion Sanders said on NFL Network after this story first broke, I’m sure he and Pacman will have a prayer meeting and work all this out. Maybe Ray-Ray will come over and they can all get right with the Lord.
October 14th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Slash, so you mean she looked like this?
October 14th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Greg, what is the worst fraternity on this campus?
Well that would be hard to say, sir. They’re each outstanding in their own way.
Cut the horseshit, son. I’ve got their disciplinary files right here. Who dropped a whole truckload of fizzies into the swim meet? Who delivered the medical school cadavers to the alumni dinner? Every Halloween, the trees are filled with underwear. Every spring, the toilets explode.
You’re talking about Dallas, sir.
Of course I’m talking about Dallas, you TWERP!
October 14th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
What part of “she had it coming” does the commish not understand?
October 14th, 2008 at 3:41 pm
i especially like the pairing of this with the “Chocolate News” ad at the top
October 14th, 2008 at 3:46 pm
The issue here is not whether Pac broke a few rules, or took a few liberties with his female party guests – he did.
October 14th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
@Drew: To fill the newly created hole at quarterback, Jerry Jones just signed Thor to a one-year contract
October 14th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Wasn’t there a “this team is going to implode” tag that would have fit this entry?
October 14th, 2008 at 4:03 pm
Please let there be a new “Wade and Jerry” this week
October 14th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
All that really needs to besaid.
looking forward to the next wade and jerry
October 14th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
When asked about his impending suspension, Pacman remarked simply, “Not down wid it.”
October 14th, 2008 at 4:09 pm
Why so there is, WISMAD.
October 14th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
This time next year, TO will be playing for the Patriots.
It will be awesome watching Tom Brady try to figure out how the fuck he’s supposed to get TO and Randy Moss the ball 20 times a game each. They’ll just have to line up max protect with 8 O-linemen and those two on every play.
October 14th, 2008 at 4:13 pm
Also, Pacman ain’t down wid it. But he gon have plenty mo time to tracta dat azz. All John Deere and shit.
October 14th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
ZOMG GUYZ!!!! Brett Favre talked to Tony Romo about his pinky finger injury!!!!! IT’S LIKE HE’S PASSING THE GUNSLINGER, SMILING QUARTERBACK ROLE!!!! cAN YOU BELIEVE IT JAWS?!?!?!?! ISN’T THAT THE MOST INCREDIBLE THING?!?!?!
October 14th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
The Cowboys traded for Roy Williams today too, as a future replacement for TO when he loses his fucking mind.
October 14th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
Warning to all women in the greater Irving/Dallas metro area. DO NOT GO OUT TO CLUBS TONIGHT!!! Pac-man is pissed and looking for bitches to slap and innocent bystanders to shoot.
Oh, and does anyone else think that TO is about to do something really crazy because he isn’t getting his share of the spotlight, what with Romo and Pacman taking all the headlines?
October 14th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Wade could be heard after the suspension announcement screaming “…and they took the pastry bar! The whole fucking pastry bar!”
The last time I saw something so predictably scripted I woke up during a “Young Guns” movie – I quickly drank the rest of the bottle and problem solved.
October 14th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
holy fuck, this misery tastes Soooo gooood. Mmmmmm….god yes
October 14th, 2008 at 9:13 pm
And PacMan seemed like such a nice boy. Who saw this coming?
October 14th, 2008 at 10:19 pm
You know, we’re all having a good laugh at the Cowboys’ expense, but really it’s the Titans that are taking it in the ass. Cowboys really lose nothing in all of this, except the services of that rough ‘n’ tough colored boy.
That’s one black person who sure puts a thrill in this hockey mom. He can gobble me up and make me take it in the ass anytime!
October 14th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
But what about Ms. Pac-man?
October 15th, 2008 at 1:44 am
Don’t you dare say it!
October 15th, 2008 at 1:52 am
He don’ drank.
Darwin was right.
Poor bastard’s not even big enough to be a UPS driver.
October 15th, 2008 at 12:46 pm
At least with the NFL suspending pac, the Titans will have to give the Cowboys back a pick and the Cowboys don’t owe them shit, so that’s some good news, right? RIGHT!?!?!?!
SOMEONE TALK TO ME!!!!