Brady Quinn Endorses John McCain, Heads Up Local Chapter Of Log Cabin Republicans

This has been a hotly contested Presidential election. Perhaps you are an undecided voter. Perhaps you just aren’t sure who you want to lead the country through this very difficult time. Perhaps you’re thinking to yourself, “I just won’t know how to vote until I hear from the backup quarterback and left tackle for one of the NFL’s most absymal teams.” Well, you’re in luck. For Brady Quinn, along with Joe Thomas, has gotten all soaped up and “come out” as a John McCain supporter.

This surprised me, because I figured John McCain’s conservative views conflicted with Brady, um, choice of lifestyle. Then again, I can see Quinn’s endorsement appealing to crucial swing voters. And by “swing voters,” I mean local steel mill workers who tell their wives they’re going bowling, only to swing by a shirtless rave with five or six of their closest “buddies.”

What’s driving Quinn’s endorsement? Well, as Christmas Ape said, “Let’s just say when Brady hears ‘Joe-Six Pack,’ he doesn’t think of beer.” Indeed. Last time Brady was presented with a vagina, he said, “Thanks, but no thanks.”

Thanks to reader Jamaal for the tip.

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45 Responses to “Brady Quinn Endorses John McCain, Heads Up Local Chapter Of Log Cabin Republicans”

  1. Upstate Underdog Says:

    Ocho Cinco for Obama, Quinn for McCain. Ohio is truly a battle ground state.

  2. Jay Says:

    Joe Thomas? The prototypical man’s ogre? The sort of person who could say “FEE FI FO FUM” and have scores of people run from his terrifying visage? WELL I’M CONVINCED

  3. Brian Says:

    does joe thomas’ badassedness offset brady quinn’s general sucktitude at life here in making me not ashamed of voting republican? probably not.

  4. SMK Says:

    Andrew Sullivan is going to pitch an absolute fit.

  5. OzoneRanger Says:

    McCain has promised Brady a SWEET job in his cabinet.

    Under his desk in the oval office.

  6. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    Hot stuff, comin’ through!

  7. TF Says:

    Hot thtuff, comin’ through!

  8. TF Says:

    @StuScott

    Will you marry me?

  9. claude balls Says:

    If George Bush doesn’t make you ashamed of voting Republican, nothing will.

  10. claude balls Says:

    [Puts on flame retardant clothing]

  11. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    @TF: Why not? We work hard, we play hard!

  12. Unsilent Majority Says:

    [puts on retard retardant clothing]

  13. SL22 Says:

    Brian, I think you’ll be alright. You can call it a wash.

    Plus, while Brady’s gayness might lead him to stray from McCain, the fact that there’s no way in hell that he’ll ever have to worry about an abortion brought him right back.

  14. mini dagger Says:

    my friends, come join me in this hot tub.

  15. jackin'4beats Says:

    Quinn’s smiling because he dropped the soap and knows that McCain’s got his back. Oh yeah…

    [cue gay porn music]

  16. big dave Says:

    know who’s gay THAT ONE.

    priceless.

  17. Day Man: Fighter of the Night Man Says:

    I can’t wait for this fucking election to finally be over

  18. claude balls Says:

    Game, set, and match to Mr. Majority.

  19. TDub Says:

    Sarah Palin.

  20. Al Davis is a Lich Says:

    I’ve got her back…

  21. Jay Cutler Smug Prick Face Says:

    In defense of Brady, if the Browns had a clue he wouldn’t be a ‘back-up QB of one of the NFL’s most abysmal franchises’.

    By the time we know about Obama/Mccain, Brady will have shed that title for sure, and Romeo Crennel will be at home eating pancakes with his bare hands.

    /squirting syrup in his mouth after each bite.

  22. poop Says:

    “Romeo Crennel will be at home eating pancakes with his bare hands.
    /squirting syrup in his mouth after each bite.”

    That’s the best idea I’ve heard all day. Keeps the dishes clean, while avoiding a syrupy mess. No wonder people call Romeo Crennel one of the great thinkers of our time.

  23. Brian Says:

    @ Jay Cutler: Ah yes, nothing like a noodle armed QB to fix your team’s problems at O-Line, wide receiver, weakside/strongside/inside linebacker, cornerback, and free/strong safety…

  24. Trey J Diggitty Says:

    Anyone notice the link to the Browns story at the bottom of the article?

    “If Quinn can’t beat out Anderson, Quinn must really…suck” by Gregg Doyle

  25. Sarah Palin Says:

    You know, the campaign may be struggling a bit these past few weeks, and this is almost surely because of the weird old man I’m campaigning with, but this just isn’t what we need. You see, it’s gotta be all about job creation. And we hockey moms in the world just don’t want to have to explain to our children why there are men in the world who want to have sex with other men. Even if those men claim to love Jesus, like Joe Gibbs or Tony Dungy. No. I say to Brady Quinn: when you have sex with other men the terrorists win!

  26. Mo Charlo Says:

    Aren’t most closeted gay congressmen republican? It’s an innocent question.

    /runs because he already knows the answer.

  27. Prehistoric Martyball Says:

    It’s a match made in heaven. John McCain can’t lift his arms up to signal a touchdown, and Brady Quinn will never throw one in the NFL.

    As for Joe Thomas, he’s decided to skip voting on election day and go fishing with his dad.

  28. dAndy ManCandy Says:

    I’m John McCain, and I support Brady Quinn’s throwing of bun darts!!!

  29. Favre's Next Interception Says:

    Obama’s pissed off and is now courting Jeff Garcia’s endorsment.

  30. dAndy ManCandy Says:

    or catching of the bun darts.

    /I’m John McCain, and I approved this message.

  31. Nate Newton's van Says:

    Now let me show you how we did it in the Hanoi Hilton, Brady.

  32. Santiago Blackwell Says:

    Brady Quinn strongly supports getting drilled offshore.

  33. 5823111 Says:

    McCain: “In answer to Brady’s question, yes, I used to fire a hot missile up the exhaust pipe of my enemy combatant.”

  34. Nate Newton's van Says:

    Uh…drill, baby, drill?

  35. SonOfSpam Says:

    My friends, I appreciate your support, my friends.

    /wandering aimlessly on stage

    //shits Depends

    ///grins creepily

  36. Aaron Says:

    FYI: you have your “they’re” and “their”’s reversed.

    PS: Brady Quinn is a football god.

  37. grungedave Says:

    Quinn just wants Sarah Palin to go hunting for Horse Balls.

  38. mamacita Says:

    …and Aaron’s back! This thread could not get any better.

  39. Uncle Jesse Says:

    The question we should be asking is who is the REAL Derek Anderson???

    I mean when he associates with teams like the Ravens by not declining their selection of him… he must really suck, right?

    Derek Anderson makes me very afraid.

  40. Uncle Jesse Says:

    Real Americans would decline being drafted by a crappy team… http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9F03E6DE153AF930A15757C0A9629C8B63

  41. Randy Galloway Says:

    I love the dick. Seriously. I just can’t get enough. I like it in my ass. I like it in my mouth. I love jizz. God, it tastes SO good. I don’t know why I’m confessing all of this to all of you here, but I just had to say it to someone somewhere. I want Brady Quinn. I want him to treat me rough. I want to suck his dick.

  42. jonjonjiggy Says:

    Good night and good luck!!

  43. Al Davis is a Lich Says:

    Randy, phone for you…yup, it’s Brady.

  44. denvergodfather Says:

    What the fuck just happened in the last 4 or five comments. Please fuck off.

  45. Gennifer With A G Says:

    Hey, wait a minute! STOP!!!!

    I’m from Cleveland, as in I didn’t choose to be a Browns fan. I just am, and you guys are CREEPING ME THE FUCK OUT!!!!

    Argh!!

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