Tony Gets a Call From Peter King
Int. Romo’s apartment
[phone rings]
Tony: You got Romo!
Peter King: Hey Tony, how are you doing today?
Tony: Oh hey, Peter. I’m good, I’m getting ready for Sunday’s game.
Peter: I bet you are, I bet you are.
Tony: Yeah…so what is it you’re calling about?
Peter: Oh you know, I just wanted to chat.
Tony: I have to tell you, Peter, it makes me a little bit uncomfortable when you call me like this. I’m not sure it’s appropriate behavior for a journalist.
Peter: Is that all I am to you, Tony? A journalist? I thought we were more than that!
Tony: No no, of course we are Peter, I didn’t mean to upset you, I’m just under a lot of pressure these days.
Peter: Oh, well that’s understandable.
Tony: Yeah…
Peter: So what kind of music do you like to listen to?
Tony: Uh, well lately I’ve mostly been listening to Jessica’s new album.
Peter: You know I don’t like it when you mention her name.
Tony: Listen Peter, she’s my girlfriend. We’ve been over this and it’s something you have to deal with.
Peter: But Tony, she’s no good for ya! P.S. We should be together.
Tony: What?!
Peter: She doesn’t know you like I know you.
Tony: Seriously Peter, you’re really starting to creep me out.
Peter: You know, sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds.
Tony: Wait a minute…those are lines from that song Stan!
Peter: Ha! You got me! So you’ve heard of this m&m guy too?
Tony: Of course, he’s one of the most popular artists of the last decade.
Peter: Really? I just discovered that Stan song on my iTunes, it was fantastic!
Tony: Yeah, he’s pretty good, but I don’t listen to much rap, even the white guys.
Peter: This guy’s white?! I assumed he was covered in a delicious candy shell. You know, the kind of guy that will just melt in your mouth.
Tony: Ha. Actually his name is Eminem not M&M.
Peter: Well that’s certainly disappointing. Do you know if he watches House?
Tony: No, Peter, i do not know if Eminem watches House, I’ve never met the guy.
Peter: Yeah, well I bet he watches House.
Tony: Sorry Peter, I have to go now. Jess is calling me on the other line.
Peter: Why don’t you just tie that bitch up in the trunk and drive off a bridge?
Tony: WHAT?
Peter: [hangs up]
Tags: peter king, romosexuals, tony romo
![[badge]](http://cdn.ksk.uproxx.com/wp-content/themes/default/images/100121_FOXmsnBadge_200x50.gif)
September 25th, 2008 at 11:24 am
Mmmmmmm……Peter King phonekkake.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:27 am
Can we replace “No homo” with “No Romo” in the sports vernacular?
September 25th, 2008 at 11:33 am
So will Romo follow the Tom Brady career arc of semi-likeable, humble guy who realizes dumbluck has put him in a position he’s to make shitload of money to a play a game to a pompous asshole where a bounty on his knees seems like a reasonable thing to do?
\I’m on the fence on this one.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:36 am
Interesting… the gay writer likes the Gay Rapper
September 25th, 2008 at 11:41 am
“Why don’t you just tie that bitch up in the trunk and drive off a bridge?”
And make sure you stay in the car to steer, Romo. Don’t want to take a chance the car swerves and misses the water.
No, “I Want to Be Your Lady” playing in the background at PK’s?
September 25th, 2008 at 11:44 am
Yet again the Giants are disrespected in the Minorstream Media.
Everyone knows that if Peter King were looking for the next big thing at QB he’d be calling Elisha Nelson Manning.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:51 am
If said car could be the General Lee with Stifler and Jackass count me in. You could wipe out a helluva lot of idiot genes in that conflagration.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:55 am
This week’s Coffeenerdness: My tea’s gone cold I’m wondering why.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:57 am
+1
September 25th, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Gay crank calls by PK…that’s enough to keep me awake all night…huddled in a corner.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
That whore PK needs to stick to one QB. He is already breaking all those sweet promises to be loyal to Farve
September 25th, 2008 at 12:12 pm
Why don’t you just tie that bitch up in the trunk and drive off a bridge?
cosigned. this chick is replaceable.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:29 pm
“You got Romo!”
This is made all the more amazing by the fact that, now that I think about it, that is clearly how that jerkoff answers the phone.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:34 pm
This was fantastic UM. Very fucking creepy.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
This was eerie. Creepily eerie. I could see PK going through the progression of emotions that Stan does in the song. Culminating with him screaming and crying, “Dear Mr. I’m too good to call or write…”
Plus, I thought that PK would have just been into Dido, not Eminem featuring Dido.
September 25th, 2008 at 12:47 pm
Also, “You got Romo!” is the new [flies open].
September 25th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
on the phone, could Romo really explain the difference between m&m and eminem?
/Romo sucks
//Dido still hot despite no longer being in the spotlight
September 25th, 2008 at 1:08 pm
This slash fiction becomes more based in reality every week.
September 25th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Today the KSK Krew obviously woke up on the “lets fuck PK side of the bed”.
/reaping all the benefits
September 25th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
Spit coffee out laughing out loud funny.
September 25th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
PK accidentally bought the Dido CD…he thought the cover said something else.
As for Eminem, first time PK heard it, he screamed “YES — I AM STAN!” then tucked his package under his taint and played some Stone Roses at high volume.
September 25th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
@gooch
Elisha Nelson Manning? Hahahaha, that’s funny man
/looks it up on wikipedia
HOLY SHIT THAT IS HIS REAL NAME
September 25th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
You know I hate Romo too. All I can think about everytime I see him play is that no matter who much he fucks up, when he gets home he’s got that sweet piece of ass waiting for him. Wait, I’m not talking about Jessica, I’m talking about PK.
/hoping people realize that was a joke.
/realizing joke was stupid
/leaving now
September 25th, 2008 at 11:07 pm
PK accidentally bought the Dido CD…he thought the cover said something else.
+ 1 there.
As a lifelong Cowboys fan – I cannot STAND Tony Romo. It’s not just the whole luck thing, it’s the “going to Cabo” in the MIDDLE OF THE PLAYOFFS WHEN YOU SHOULD BE FOCUSING ON THE NEXT GAME I DON’T CARE WHAT WADE OR JERAAL SAY.
Not that I’m still bitter or anything.
September 25th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
what PK really wants is the tony romo fleshlight
September 26th, 2008 at 10:17 am
As for Eminem, first time PK heard it, he screamed “YES — I AM STAN!” then tucked his package under his taint and played some Stone Roses at high volume.
absurdly disturbing.