Comments on: Thanks, Dallas Clark, For Assfisting Me Yet Again

By: robocats

robocats — Fri, 19 Sep 2008 17:26:59 +0000

Dallas Clark has literally fucked me over in exactly the same way every year that I’ve participated in Fantasy Football. Every year, I lost a big game because he had one bullshit catch that gave him just ridiculous point totals. Now I pick him, and he’s gone Ricky Williams on my Dolphins.

By: Bizz Busserson

Bizz Busserson — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 14:09:02 +0000

I don’t understand this “fantasy football” talk. Does that have something to do with the interweb?

By: Barack Obama

Barack Obama — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 12:27:51 +0000

@John, get fucked. Just a year ago you were caught on tape bitching about Dallas Clark.

By: Jessimuhka

Jessimuhka — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 01:32:13 +0000

I already dumped Clark for Dante Rosario AKA Rosario Dawson. I’m a fickle bitch like that.

By: BadLiberal

BadLiberal — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 01:16:40 +0000

@ognihs ~~fantasy football~~ Gambling drives the nfl. without the ~~fantasy geeks~~ gambling degenerates, the league wouldn’t be as successful. FTFY

By: deafjeff

deafjeff — Thu, 11 Sep 2008 01:06:54 +0000

I’m with Claude, I like the Bills. That’s it, I hate everyone else. Or I don’t care. Either way, why spend all the time and money to root for guys I hate? Get to know the game better? I know the game a plenty, I like the Bills and the other 31 teams can go fuck themselves. And they are not going to Toronto, asshats.

By: fangirls on helium

fangirls on helium — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 20:16:01 +0000

I have PeyPey and Clark on my team. THANKS A FUCKING LOT, HOMERISM

By: claude balls

claude balls — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 19:46:46 +0000

JFB: Wow. Touched a nerve there, did I? Don’t hate on me for pointing out the truth. Whether you want to admit it or not, fantasy football is the pursuit of geeks. Just because you hang out on websites with other geeks who think it is cool doesn’t mean that the rest of the world buys your bullshit. It’s mental masturbation for wannabe GMs and coaches. If you can’t get into the game without that sideshow, then you are not really into the game.

“FFB absolutely has made the game larger than life . . [and is] one of the main reasons why FOX, CBS, NBC and ESPN have to pay a PREMIUM to broadcast games every Sunday.” Are you shitting me? What are you, ten years old? The NFL has been larger than life for decades and the networks have been ponying up billions of dollars to broadcast the games for years. Those things happened long before stat nerds finally found a way to be interested in the game. As for your assertions that fantasy football has injected “tons of revenue” NFL.com, ESPN and other sites, and is a “billion dollar” business, do you have any support for those claims? Or are you just trying to make yourself feel better?

Look, fantasy football bores the shit out of me. And this argument really bores the shit out of me. Can we get back to the dick jokes?

By: TurleyGirlie

TurleyGirlie — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:48:20 +0000

Tom Brady – my starting QB
Jeff Garcia – my backup
Dallas Clark – my starting TE
Ben Utecht – my backup

Plus, it’s a keeper league. How can I drop Brady? Some cockbite will certainly pick him up off waivers.

By: Monkey Business

Monkey Business — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:36:28 +0000

@Hard Drugs & Easy Listening: holy crap, that was hilarious. And as much as I’d like to send him over the middle, at least Clark will bounce back. Gonzo was out for like three weeks with a bent finger or some shit last season. I’d hate for him to get blown up, Tanard Jackson style, and have to have his spleen removed or some shit.