KSK Off-Topic: Those Poor, Poor Rich People
As the whole country sweats this financial bailout stuff, New York Magazine has turned its focus on the story we’ve so desperately wanted uncovered: “Golly, what ever has happened to those poor Lehman Brothers traders?” The whole story is worth your complete disdain, but here are a few choice selections:
Like many on Wall Street, the Trader’s career was moving along briskly. By 2006, he had settled into a new $2 million house in Connecticut with a pool, and kept a pied-à-terre in Manhattan. With two young children, he had private-school tuition to cover. He had recently completed a home renovation, and now there was talk of a new porch with a built-in stainless-steel barbecue. The Trader estimated that he was two years from making enough money to retire and never have to work again.
In other words, the guy next door. A real average joe. I hardly know him, yet I already have a bottomless well of sympathy for him.
Alas, the Trader had to come to grips with this cold new world.
The collapse of the world’s most powerful wealth-creating engine required everyone to take stock of their financials… “They’re going to have to sell homes. The question is, will the homes sell? They’re cutting some of the children’s activities out, dance class, acting class. Are they going to have flowers delivered every day to their homes? I don’t think so!”
No, not acting class! You MONSTERS! How else will our nation’s rich children rise to become Hollywood elite? You can’t expect them to study and work their way through the world, can you? You can’t expect people to enjoy life without fresh flowers in their homes! Oh, the humanity!
At this level, it’s not a tragedy so much as the end of a specific vision of the American good life…
Thanks for spelling that out.
[A Craigslist post] read, “Should I leave my fiancé? … I guess I already know the answer. My boyfriend … rather fiancé, is/was employed by Lehman Brothers,” the posting stated. “In less than a week we went from being millionaires to just having a couple of 100K … I suppose this means it’s over. I am who I am. I personally blame all this on [Lehman CEO] Dick Fuld. I blame him for ruining my happiness.”
“I was so in love with my fiance until he became merely upper class!”
In conclusion, be sure to be nice to anyone you know who fell from the lofty ranks of obscenely rich to the lowly depths of the nation’s wealthiest 5%. Maybe you can clean their house for free or something.
(Bonus sexy businesswoman here)
Tags: captain caveman, KSK off topic
September 26th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Some days there just ain’t enough bullets.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Without these linchpins of the economy, I fear for the Ferrari dealership on Greenwich Ave.
/former Fairfield Country douche
September 26th, 2008 at 2:31 pm
Wow, that sucks. Some of these people might have to start driving a domestic car and actually start cleaning their house and take care of their kids sans nanny.
And to the girl whose fiance is now only worth a couple of $110K, you are a cunt.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Am not sure what I’m more pissed about. This article or the fact that no one where I work looks like those 2 hot office babes.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Might be time to start pimping those trophy wives to Silky Garrard. “Earn dat money biatch!”
September 26th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
The worst part of all this is the Kyle Orton’s of the world (granola crunching tree huggers) get to self-affirm themselves that they are completely right about everything now that corporate greed and big-business is seemignly taking all of the blame for this mess. Ugg..
/ wants to punch a rich asshole in a business suit with a nice hair cut
/Seriously, will we see people on welfare in a car cheaper than the status quo Escalade now?
September 26th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Dear shallow cunt, he only kept you around due to your swallowing.
That should make her feel better
September 26th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Silly girl, those copies are going to be blurry.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Off topic, but needs to be said… For any of you that live in Seattle and want to kill someone and probably get away with it… Here’s your chance…. What an asshole
September 26th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
That first businesswoman is the reason I work in Financial Services in Manhattan. That pic is right on so many levels.
As for the super wealthy assholes who leveraged themselves to their eyeballs just so they could pay off everything with their million dollar bonuses…all I have to say is good fucking riddance you spoiled little shits.
/love the pissed off venom when accompanied by hot business babes
September 26th, 2008 at 2:42 pm
While delivering patio furniture to some rich folks, I had to walk through their kitchen. It was worth more than everything my wife and I owned at the time (including my car). Their 14-year-old daughter (I think her name was Buffy or Mandy, or something else ending in a “y”), wearing the latest haute couture tennis togs, said into the phone (loud enough that the other guy and I could hear), “yes, the moo-ooving men are here,” disdain dripping from every syllable. My motto became, eat the rich.
/no hard feelings.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
The bonus sexy businesswoman saved Sexy Friday
September 26th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
I can’t go back to coach. I can’t, I won’t!
September 26th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
And some around the city met the crisis with a kind of glee. “What do you think just happened to the lifestyles of all the guys who girls want to meet?” one hedge-fund analyst wondered. “This is the best time ever to maintain ten girlfriends. You could be an African tribal leader!”
Priceless.
September 26th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
can we find that craigslist ad and respond to her how we feel?
September 26th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
sad thing is those ceo’s are prolly still gonna get nice fatty fuck you go away now packages.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
There hasn’t been this many angry rich assholes since Danny Noonan sunk his $80,000 putt.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
I’m a former Lehman trader, and I also “got the axe” to use the parlance of our times. However, as I diversified my bonuses into the booming South Asian slave trading market, I should get through this OK. Thank you for your concern, though.
Gotta run. Ta ta
September 26th, 2008 at 3:03 pm
damnit daydream billiever beating me to the post
i couldn’t care less about any of these motherless fuck or their bosses, who will all receive generous compensation when they step down.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
@spatula, the fuck is haute couture?
September 26th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Maybe they can sit in coach with Diddy.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
I have so much to say on this matter! Perhaps we talk a little bit, America? Just over coffee or drinks or something, get reacquainted.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:08 pm
That’s what you get when you bet your life’s savings AGAINST the Harlem Globetrotters, even if you think the Generals are due.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
OH, the poor baby’s happiness is ruined because her fiance isn’t a millionare anymore. Well bitch, get out there and start hustling that ass, because it doesn’t seem like you were bringing anything else to the table.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:13 pm
Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill the poor.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
no luck finding that ad so far, searched the personals in NYC, not sure what section it would be in
September 26th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
the revolution will be televised, but not subsidized.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
There is nothing quite as wonderful as money, There is nothing quite as beautiful as cash. Some people say it’s folly, But I’d rather have the lolly, With money you can ma-ake a splash.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
what’s with Seahawk fans opposition to finance?
http://deadspin.com/5055403/seahawks-message-board-poster-succeeds-in-creating-rivalry-with-the-giants-fails-as-human
September 26th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
That second one is obviously a secretary. Businesswoman don’t do copy machines. Copy machine repairmen on the other hand…
September 26th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I blame whitey! Of course I mean Whitey Ford….that son of a bitch!
September 26th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
Can I get an extra copy of that?
September 26th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
@glass_family:
Drown ‘em. They’re not worth the cost of a bullet.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:54 pm
Sadly, the reality is without a bailout every single person will feel the pain and the lower you are on the tax bracket the worse it will be. Its quite possible banks will close and certain people will not get their paychecks. The rich people can handle a month without their paychecks its everyone else who will get screwed in the end. The congressman will still get paid so they have no problem bitching from their soap box. This is going to be a complete and total disaster, like the Millen era.
September 26th, 2008 at 3:56 pm
@CubsDynasty: It’s not out of the question that Millen quit the Lions in order to focus on fixing America’s economy, is it?
/oh god
September 26th, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Nothing like crybaby capitalism — privatize the profits, socialize the losses.
Only in America could a colossal clusterfuck like Carly Fiorina drive a top company like Hewlett Packard into the toilet, killing off 70% of its stock value and forcing the layoff of 20,000 employees, and be rewarded with a $42 million dollar golden parachute. And to top it all off, she then gets to shill for McCain as an economic expert.
Up against the wall, motherfuckers.
September 26th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
I generally abhor violence against women. Unless it’s committed by other women, of course.
To that end, I’m willing to pay FMRA and Smurphette to hunt down that Craigslist bitch and beat the ever loving shit out of her.
September 26th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
I plan to make some money off this poor ecomonic downturn… I think Its always sunny had a good idea: Human Hunting. and Televise it…. these guys have no real world skills so lets put them in a Running Man style fight to the death… if you make it out then you are paid off for life, if not… fuck it what did you have to live for besides trading stock?
September 26th, 2008 at 4:54 pm
Rickey fears for his financial solvency!
September 26th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
And while we’re on the topic of rich, out of touch white dudes, nice of Senator McCheese to hop off of his soapbox for a few hours to show up for a debate on the economy.
September 26th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
oh it gets better - read this comment from CT’s almost senator Ned Lamont (talking about Greenwich CT)
“It’s a Wall Street town. Everyone is shaky,” Lamont said at midweek. “It really is a financial tsunami, and it could go either way. It took Japan 20 years to recover from their buying binge [in the 1980s]. How long does it take us to work through the excessive leverage? That could take us years, not months. This is our Katrina.”
http://www.courant.com/news/local/hc-greenwich0921.artsep21,0,6487093.story?page=2
September 26th, 2008 at 5:28 pm
This makes me fucking sick, I worked in the IT department at Bear Stearns and the people like this article describes were huge pricks. I guess karma does exist
September 26th, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Eh, money can’t buy class. We all knew that. It’s what makes me feel (kinda) OK about not having a lot of it. That Craigslist skank said it herself: she knows she’s a hooker. At least she’s honest about it, unlike the people responsible for this clusterfuck. She didn’t cost us any money. So, bygones…
September 26th, 2008 at 6:49 pm
From the article: And on Wall Street, self-worth and net worth can amount to the same thing. “The hardest thing in my mind is to have your compensation cut,” a veteran Wall Street executive says. “It’s almost like you’re a bad person.”
Almost?
September 26th, 2008 at 8:51 pm
So. Is New York magazine where that douche from that now-douchey sports website now douches his douchetastic douche repository?
September 26th, 2008 at 9:48 pm
God forbid these assholes might have to look for another job… Not a single reference to the alternatives to trading stocks, despite the fact that there is, was and will always be enough work to go around. It just means they might have to get their hands dirty. Of course, I bet that never even occurred to any of their Ivy League-addled minds!
September 27th, 2008 at 12:21 pm
Isn’t the Greenwich Ferrari dealership on W. Putnam Ave?
/current Fairfield County douche — but at least I work for a living
September 27th, 2008 at 12:37 pm
Wait–what about the Trader’s pied-a-terre in Manhattan? Will it be safe? Won’t somebody please think of the pied-a-terre?
September 27th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
Hey! Not fair! I’m piss-poor and without the ring and blondeness I look just like that chick when I go to work every day. dude, that’s false advertising!
September 28th, 2008 at 12:50 pm
Here is how to make the evil, nasty, rich people poor - kill all the poor people(making less than 500k anually).
Then the lowest salaried people will be the ones making 500k - that will teach those rich fucks.
Or we could hold politicians and the regulatory groups accountable for keeping an eye on big business.
If G.W.B. had ever been 30 days late on a payment - the media would have crucified him as a deadbeat dad. Why didnt this happen when lehman bros could fund any loans?
September 29th, 2008 at 11:43 am
one two
September 29th, 2008 at 11:59 am
one Sundee! two
October 10th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
KDinCT & DeepFriar, the Ferrari Dealership (Carriage House Motors) is actually on Railroad Ave by the train station.
/Non-Douche employed in Greenwich
October 11th, 2008 at 12:08 am
Wooderson,
True, but there is also a Ferrari dealership on West Putnam Avenue. Counting Miller Motorcars there are actually three places to purchase a Ferrari within 2 miles.
/Douche raised on the mean streets of Riverside