After Kids, I Didn’t Think It Would Still Be Tight

Taking seven balls in one day and remaining a tight end, now that’s talent.

As much as I’d love to give the comely actress credit (by which I mean the credit card maneuver), FOX Sports should note that that was actually Panthers tight end Dante Rosario who made the last-second winning touchdown grab against the Chargers yesterday. Rosario Dawson was only involved in the play in a sexy context.

Reminder: The first of our regularly scheduled Monday Night Football live blogs is this evening. We’ll definitely be doing the first and possibly the second if Jay Cutler can keep our blood sugar levels high enough.

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25 Responses to “After Kids, I Didn’t Think It Would Still Be Tight”

  1. Unsilent Majority Says:

    Lala Bonilla!

  2. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    Wow

  3. El Duke Says:

    if Jay Cutler can be our blood sugar levels high enough

    Am I reading this right or is it just way too early?

  4. Cutler's Sugar Cookies Says:

    Yeah, I saw this and since I didn’t have the sound on during the game I thought for a little while that was actually the dude’s name. I told a friend, “shit, that’s worse than Evan Longoria!” I guess a Fox staffer was just jerking it to Grindhouse while maintaining the UPS leaderboard.

  5. Skunkboy Says:

    I’m confused, then. Which Rosario had this line of dialogue in Clerks 2?:

    Becky: [to Dante] Sometimes, in the heat of the moment, it’s forgivable to go ass to mouth.

  6. jackin'4beats Says:

    I missed that with the Cowboys stomping a mudhole in the Browns yesterday and all, and…

    Rosario Dawson could get it anytime, any place. Dante Rosario…not so much.

  7. The Gooch Says:

    That’s pretty funny.

    What’s not funny is your lazy photoshopping. Do you really have that much hatred for your readers? Would it really be so hard to put Rosario Dawson’s head on top of Dante Rosario’s body? Is that really too much to ask?

    If you wanted to go the full-body-shot-cause-she’s-sexy route, I know there are hotter Rosario Dawson pics out there.

    Come on boys, I know it’s Monday Morning but step it up.

  8. The Gooch Says:

    @j4b

    Did they do it like they were straight out the swamp?

  9. chris-bessmervin Says:

    Is it wrong that I felt my self secretly rooting for Silky Gerrad while at the Titans game.

  10. bob.pooner Says:

    I thought I imagined that yesterday…. and cared so little I didn’t even TIVO back to double check, then it really started to bother me, so I’m glad you posted this.

  11. Christmas Ape Says:

    Why is Rosario Dawson’s head on Dante Rosario’s body something you’re clamoring for? I don’t even want to delve into that one.

  12. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    @gooch: Refund’s in the mail.

  13. LihueAirport Says:

    Why is Rosario Dawson’s head on Dante Rosario’s body something you’re clamoring for? I don’t even want to delve into that one.

    Because this is a humor site. You can find Rosario Dawson pictures anywhere. He’s totally queer though you’re probably right.

  14. The Gooch Says:

    I don’t see what’s so weird about that. It would go nicely on my wall right next to the picture of of Chris Farley’s head on Marissa Miller’s body.

    Mmm….

  15. Westbrook Is My Anti-Drug Says:

    I love football season.

  16. StuScottBooyahs Says:

    Taking seven balls in one day and remaining a tight end, now that’s talent.

    Was the last guy Lance Armstrong?

  17. D'Angelo Says:

    Spelled my name wrong, too!

    /brown sugar baby

  18. SonOfDad Says:

    Yes.

  19. jackin'4beats Says:

    @The Gooch: The Cowboys feet were so far up the Browns asses, Romeo Crennel could taste the bloody leather. Then he washed that down with a KFC 12 pack and a large diet coke.

  20. The Gooch Says:

    Romeo Crennel’s Warus Face > Mike Holmgren’s Walrus Face

  21. Gino Tourettsa Says:

    Is that picture to scale?

  22. ognihs Says:

    @ gino - part of me hopes so. it’s the part that can’t tell if a giant rosario dawson is better than a mini roasrio dawson.

  23. dick_gozinia Says:

    Carolina just got sexy!!!

  24. rich Says:

    fox announcers were way slow on the call… they didn’t realize he caught it for like 5 seconds

  25. Justino Says:

    I walked around for the next few hours wondering if that was his name until I saw highlights where they called him Dante. Then I wondered where the hell I got Rosario Dawson from.

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