The Story Of Brett Favre’s 2008 Season, Predicted Using Only NY Post Pun Headlines
Fuh-Brett-aboudit: Jersey welcomes Favre
Meet The Bretts! Crazy bleachers fans pledge their allegiance to gunslinger
My panties are all Brett: Our Andrea Peyser says Favre a “real man”
New Jersey Bretts: New resident welcomed by home crowd
Sour Clemons: Favre arrival ruins run at starting gig
Favring For Football! Brett “Hungry” To Start Taking Snaps
Brett Brett Hut! Favre practices
Not Favre Now! Brett to Start in Week 1!
Favrey Far Far! Jets win in laugher!
Bobba Brett! Favre hunts down opposing corners!
Breast in Show: Deanna Favre at NY Fashion Week
Catherine Bretta Jones! Deanna and Douglas’ wife spar in “huge catfight”
Brett’s Get Physical: Jets win ugly brawler against Bills
Best Little Fourhouse In Jersey: Jets win again!
Bretty in Pink: Favre supports wife’s breast cancer awareness
Favre And Away: Brett and Peter King marry in Irish countryside
Favralous! Favre and King enjoy 2-night Key West getaway
You Can Brett On It! Favre Boldly Predicts Win Over Dolphins
Brettrosexual! Favre goes shoe shopping at Barney’s
Brett Offensive! Throw 3 picks in Pats loss
Chronicles Of Favria: Steve Serby hails the Jets new “Prince”
Bretteranarian! Favre tells Cindy Adams about his love for small toy dogs
Rum Slinger: Favre arrested in barroom brawl
Soldier Boy! Fightin’ Favre reminds our Steve Dunleavy of his old WWI chums at Gallipoli
Favre-y Dent: Brett’s inconsistent play has made him a Two-Face
Not The Man He First Brett: King and Favre try “trial separation”
4 Skinned? Favre arrested in Montclair, NJ, rest stop sting
Favre 4 Fighting: Jets make run at final playoff spot
Brett Him Outta Here! Rich Lowry says Favre’s whiny ways totally fucking Un-American
Favra Conger! Brett did all for the $$$$!
Brett Him Play! Favre wants start over Clemons
Brett Blanket! Favre unhappy with Clemons start
Pot Calls Brettle Back! Mangini says Favre “sabotaging” team
A Bridge Too Favre? Mangini and Favre “at a stalemate”
Favre, Nifty 4, Where Are You?! Favre a no-show for road trip
Favred Up! Jets miss playoffs thanks to untimely 8 INT Favre performance after Kellen goes down!
Thanks Four The Memories: Favre retires after disappointing season in New York; plans July unretirement
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Tags: funnest thing i did all day, ksk group posts, puns, ufford wrote the best ones
August 7th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Broadway Brett: “When Brett’s a Jet, He’s a Jet All The Way”
August 7th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Where’s the headline about the inevitable Brett, A-Rod, Madonna 3-way?
August 7th, 2008 at 1:02 pm
@PanamaCityHotel: “Masculine, she-male type: Favre A-Rod’s kinda guy!”
August 7th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
thank you kind sir. also, looking forward to tday’s Balls Deep.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
“Kerry Picks Gephardt!”
Oh, sorry, that was a headline that showed the Post was a joke.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
Favre, Nifty 4, Where Are You?!
OK, that’s inspired. Rupert Murdoch probably has someone cribbing these already.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
No “SHOW US YOUR BRETTS”?!
August 7th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
Q: What hot dog does Peter King like to put in his mouth the most?
A: Sa-Brett! Although Sa-brett is best known for their all beef natural casing and skinless frankfurters, they also manufacture a wide variety of meats including hot sausage, kielbasa, salami, and reach-a-rounds.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Oops. I was unclear on the concept here. I feel shame.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:14 pm
You know, I could see 95% of these on the back page of the Post. Un-fucking-believeable.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
you bretter believe it
August 7th, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Brett-onomic collapse: Farve’s 4th Q Int mercifully ends Jets season
August 7th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
Oh and Favre, the Jets Drop another as Favre slings 6 INT’s
August 7th, 2008 at 1:17 pm
Favre-O, Brett Breaks Leg, may get put down.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:18 pm
4 Head: Favre and PK filmed emerging from the same bathroom stall in a NJ Turnpike rest stop
August 7th, 2008 at 1:19 pm
Here’s my predictions for a season’s worth of NYPost headlines:
Meet Packer District: Fans Welcome Farve at LaGuardia!
BFF!: Brett Farve Forever!
Brett It All Hang Out: Peter King’s Exclusive Interview!
Farve from Heaven: Troubled Start to Jets Season
Ready, Brett, Blow: Farve Pick Kills Chances
Crotchety and Cotchery: Farve Feuds with WRs!
Deliverance: Redneck Farve Sent Down to Tampa
Gang Green After the Amuptation
August 7th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Favre for Fighting, sure this article is about the Rangers, but Favre is only happy when he is in the headlines.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
Favrey Far Far! Jets win in laugher!
My favorite.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
The Favre-well Tour: Brett opens first practice with hints at retirement at season’s end
August 7th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
BRETT FAVRE, Bin Laden Captured
August 7th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
Favral Knowledge: PK tells all!
August 7th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Is “Favrelescent” a word? I feel like it should be a word — perhaps describing the glow of lights at a press conference.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:28 pm
I’m looking forward to 2020, when Broadyway Brett staggers through an interview and tries to make out with Kellyn Kolber.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:29 pm
Far-mazing: Brett’s Sunday brilliance leads to Monday Wall Street rally.
He’ll be affecting the stock markets now y’all.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:32 pm
He’ll be affecting the stock markets now y’all.
Pfft. He’ll be affecting the tides.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
Favre Packs, Jets for Broadway
August 7th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
I’m looking forward to 2020, when Broadyway Brett staggers through an interview and tries to make out with Kellyn Kolber.
That will be awesome for a number of reasons. Number one is that Kellyn Kolber will be 12 years old.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:44 pm
Favrey Corps-Man: Brett retires, joins the Marines!
August 7th, 2008 at 1:49 pm
The Jets add the Farvebook application to their profile
August 7th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Douche Bag!
Naw, too simple
August 7th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
“ufford wrote the best ones”
My Favre-y Dent was gold, dammit!
August 7th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
anybody think the post will try to slip a “You Look Favrelous!” in there w/out lubrication on an unsuspecting populace?
August 7th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Excellent work.
August 7th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
I’m waiting for the “Favre Off!” headlines when the sure-to-happen split between Brett-y and the Jets takes place
August 7th, 2008 at 1:59 pm
THE KILN FIELDS: Favre returns home to start own NFL Franchise
August 7th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Four Weddings and a Favre-eral: Brett Leaves Team to Marry Peter King, John Madden, Tony Kornheiser & Gene Wojciechowski, While Kelly Clemons and the Jets Finish 0-16 Season
August 7th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
Dammit, I was trying to come up with a Kiln joke. You win this round, Ape.
And J.L.White, that headline has more words than most Post articles.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
FAVRE FROM LEGENDARY BATTLE: Brady throws 4 TDs, Brett 4 INTs, Pats beat Jets big.
A BRIDGE TOO FAVRE: Brett gets a DUI while crossing into Manhattan.
BRETT-LESS: Favre knocked out in 1st with bruised ribcage, Jets still beat Dolphins by 20.
NOBODY FAVRES WITH THE JESUS: Adrian Peterson “disappointed” Vikes miss out on Favre sweepstakes.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
Brat, Drunk, And Stupid! Giuliani’s son sues Jets for denying him roster spot, invokes 9/11 heroes
August 7th, 2008 at 2:10 pm
Sorry, I missed “Bridge too Favre” above…
/slaps self in face
August 7th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Bretter Off Dead? Rodgers to Favre: Kill Yourself
August 7th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
the favre knight - jets get their hero in shining pads
August 7th, 2008 at 2:15 pm
Broadway Brett Bombs Away: Jets beat Miami 42 - 12 and as I mentioned, http://www.broadwaybrettsjets.com is already up!
August 7th, 2008 at 2:16 pm
CHIANTI AND FARVE BEANS: The Shocking Story of Cannibal Chad Pennington
August 7th, 2008 at 2:21 pm
kellen me softly - clemens excited to ignored by favre (this this motherfucker would ever tutor or mentor anyone)
hanging chad - pennington surely heading to another loser
August 7th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
favre-ing typos
August 7th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
FAVRE-ITE SON: PK SQUEEZES OUT BOUNCING BABY BOY
August 7th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Hawaiian Favre-O: Upset over perceived Pro-Bowl snub, Favre commandeers island-hopper flight and crashes into field during game
August 7th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
Young Lady Bret-terly: the story of a southern belle and his sexual awakening at the hands of Peter King and John Madden
August 7th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
Favre And Away: Brett and Peter King marry in Irish countryside
Favralous! Favre and King enjoy 2-night Key West getaway
You Can Brett On It! Favre Boldly Predicts Win Over Dolphins
The three best in my opinion…Fucking classic! But seriously Drew, your hatred for Favre is starting to get really unhealthy….I mean I am not a doctor, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night
August 7th, 2008 at 2:45 pm
Bret-er Run Through the Jungle: Favre’s 4 Interceptions against the Bengals, Clemmons’ rumored atrt heard through the grapevine.
/CCR fan
August 7th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
’start’
August 7th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
DO Q-BELIEVE IT! = actual headline on jets website
August 7th, 2008 at 2:52 pm
YOU BRETT-ER WATCH OUT–Madden Curse strikes early; Brett exiled to Jets.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:53 pm
Favre-ian Slip:A confused and old Bret Favre shows up at first Jets Game in a Vikings uniform
August 7th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
YOU BRET-TER NOT CRY: Favre sobs like a female at end of season press conference after 4-12 season as a Jet upon announcing fifth retirement
@Porky1
thanks for the inspiration
August 7th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
Personally, I think the Chad Pennington story is equally compelling. He’s got all the mediocrity that the Chiefs expect in their quarterbacks and is just the weak-armed, injury prone, ambiguously gay franchise quarterback John Gruden has been looking for.
August 7th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
/bored at work
August 7th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
PERCO HAZE - Favre leaps off the wagon into a drug induced coma after the Jets finish the season 0-16
August 7th, 2008 at 3:39 pm
Holy mackerel! Pennington to the Dolphins??!? But they’re already so loaded at qb with Josh McCown, Henne, the mormon guy, and Quincy Carter…
August 7th, 2008 at 3:51 pm
B-R-E-T, BRET! BRET! BRET!: Favre Opens New School for Illiterate Teens in the South Bronx…
August 7th, 2008 at 3:57 pm
I’m officially offering my services as a live-glogger for tonight’s Patriots preseason game. Wheee!
August 7th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
BIZZARRO WORLD NY POST HEADLINES:
The Brett Favre Question: A Sober and In-Depth Discussion in Four Parts
Brett Favre to NY: Jets fans react with quiet, dignified jubliation, return to volunteer charity work.
Brett Favre a Jet: How does this affect our public schools?
August 7th, 2008 at 4:28 pm
“BRETT-astrophe!!” after Favre sucks up the joint in the Jets-Jaguars Wildcard game.
That could also be something about Brett’s ass atrophy or Brett’s Ass Trophy.
August 7th, 2008 at 4:35 pm
@FMRA
Will you switch over and start glogging the Red Sox game if the Pats fall behind?
/sorry, couldn’t resist
August 7th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
NO DAMMIT there’s no Sox game tonight!
I will, however, get shitfaced and start assessing the relative tightness of the RB’s asses. YAY FOOTBALL.
August 7th, 2008 at 4:50 pm
FANTASY FOOTBALL!!!! I’m not wearing any pants! WHEE!
Funny ass shit there.
August 7th, 2008 at 5:25 pm
CHIANTI AND FARVE BEANS: The Shocking Story of Cannibal Chad Pennington
Otto Man wins.
August 7th, 2008 at 5:38 pm
…this isn’t funny…my girlfriend brings the post home every day…i…can’t… do…this….
/looking for handgun
August 7th, 2008 at 5:48 pm
Bretty and the Jets: He’s got electric shoes a mohair suit….ah fuck it.
O_o
August 7th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
Late Entries from the spouse:
Brett and Butterfingers: Incompletions plague Jets
Brett Smart (granted, unlikely, but there would be a hot secret-agent chick involved)
August 7th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
I’m disappointed there was no “Officer Favra” headline.
August 7th, 2008 at 6:30 pm
BBBBretty and the jets! Awesome one! Good times, this took all of us by surprise!
August 7th, 2008 at 6:32 pm
YOU BETTER, YOU BRETT! - Jets fans demand win from you know Who
August 7th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
IN-BRETT - DNA tests reveal Favre’s parents were related
August 7th, 2008 at 6:35 pm
Brett and Butter: The Sexual Predilections of the King/Favre Lost Weekend
August 7th, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Lions should sign Chad Pennington
Favre from the truth- Brett yearns to return to Green Bay
http://www.collegefastbreak.com/
August 7th, 2008 at 6:45 pm
As a Montclair HS alum, I appreciate the shout-out. Favre should know better than to frequent the bus stops that look like tudors.
August 7th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
The Farve-istrocrats! (after a particularly ugly Jet’s loss)
August 7th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Like a Brett Over Troubled Water: Shocking Sex Boat Scandal In The Hudson Shows Favre Should’ve Been A Viking
August 7th, 2008 at 10:55 pm
[...] part of the problem. But you knew that. Speaking of bloggers, MJD is right on, as usual, and KSK’s fabricated New York Post/Favre timeline is perfection. As columns go, it’s not “Favre from heaven, [...]
August 7th, 2008 at 11:26 pm
FAVRE-Y DANGER: BERNHARD GOETZ GUNSLINGER MENTALITY, SHOOTS FOUR ON SUBWAY
/revisionist history…
August 7th, 2008 at 11:32 pm
From Cheese to Whine
/explains itself
August 8th, 2008 at 9:07 am
This morning on ESPN they had no less than * SIX * (yes - 6) Favre / Jets / “Expert commentary on what does this mean” et. al., lined up.
So I went and took a shower. (yes symbolism)
August 8th, 2008 at 9:56 am
Buh buh buh Bretty and the Jets!
August 8th, 2008 at 1:25 pm
Ugly Bretty: Jets win, in spite of Favre’s 3 INTs.
August 8th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Whoever came up with ‘Breast in Show’ is a god damn genius.
August 8th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
“Far-ve too many concussions”:
Brett out for season, because Jets front line can’t protect him. Rumor has it he’s considering retirement to take up finger painting with Troy Aikman & Eric Lindros
August 10th, 2008 at 11:53 am
Soldier Boy! Fightin’ Favre reminds our Steve Dunleavy of his old WWI chums at Gallipoli
That’s the funniest shit written since Gallipoli.
August 11th, 2008 at 9:14 am
[...] Predicting the NY Post Brett Farve headlines. [...]
August 11th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
[...] I’m hope I’m wrong, but I don’t think so. Prediction - Jets 9-7 this season. [...]