Exclusive? A drunken lepraechaun had sex with a retarded chicken
Iggles fans, WTF is up with this guy? Philly is supposed to a hardass sports town, yet you tolerate this twerp? This guy wouldn’t last a week in Pittsburgh. Sorry Philly, but when you’ve got an unofficial mascot more embarrassing than the barrel guy, you forfeit any hardass status.
Part of Birdman’s problem is that he has adopted a moniker that has been used repeatedly by other amici aves over the years. According to the Old Gray Lady, this version of Birdman is an ordinary carpenter during the week. That’s just not as compelling as some of these other Birdmen of note…
A. Harvey Birdman Super-hero lawyer. I often repeat Harvey’s catchphrase, “I’ll take the case!” Of course when I say it, I’m talking about a case of GooGoo Clusters.
B. “Birdman” aka “Baby” aka “The #1 Stunna” If I tried to make pigeon calls sound tough I would probably adopt plenty of aliases too.
C. “The Birdman of Alcatraz” Robert Stroud Researched canaries while in the joint. Wrote some books. Shanked a screw.
D. “The Birdman” Koko B. Ware WWF mainstay during the mid-to-late 80s. Sang lead on the spectacularly crappy “Piledriver”. On a scale of one to gay, this video ranks Liberace.
Come to think of it, all these other Birdmen are pretty lousy too. If Philly doesn’t mind this tights-wearing twinkie, then I don’t either. Go nuts, dude.
Tags: bad MS Paint, eagles, ever seen birdman and rob iracane at the same time?, youtubage
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July 16th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
only philadelphia is collectively retarded enough to not only tolerate something so swishy, but fully support it. as long as theyre winning. which isnt much. and then theyll complain.
July 16th, 2008 at 2:13 pm
Nice Harvey Birdman reference.
“Hmm. It says here that if a person’s not married by the time he’s 35, he’s got a better chance of being robbed at gunpoint by a desperate and somewhat bloated Christian Slater.”
July 16th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
What about the late, great Wesley Willis’ “Birdman Kicked My Ass”?
July 16th, 2008 at 2:23 pm
I’m bored and KSK isn’t making me laugh today. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.
July 16th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
How do you forget the best one?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Andersen
July 16th, 2008 at 2:28 pm
I think you forgot about the immortal Chris “Time for the Birdman to Fly” Andersen.
Signed – Bill Simmons
July 16th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
Just watching that makes me want to go out and buy a pack of 9-volts to just pelt the fuck out of philly fans
July 16th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
Ha HA!
July 16th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
What happened to that boy?
July 16th, 2008 at 2:40 pm
Did the birdman of alcatraz take turns pissing in the bitches ocular cavities?
July 16th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
I think Big Bird in an Eagles uniform would be more hardcore than that dude.
July 16th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
emo Eagle fans love Birdman
July 16th, 2008 at 2:49 pm
this version of Birdman is an ordinary carpenter during the week.
Well we all know what happened to the last ordinary carpenter who inspired the masses and gathered a following…
July 16th, 2008 at 2:54 pm
Do you mean Bob Vila or The Anal-Retentive Carpenter?
July 16th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
No no… he clearly meant Tim the Toolman Taylor.
July 16th, 2008 at 2:59 pm
Karen Carpenter
July 16th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Norm Abrams is who I was referring to. He’s the MacGyver of woodworking.
July 16th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
How ’bout Schneider from “One Day at a Time” or “Buffalo Butt” Bookman from “Good Times”? Even though they were technically superintendants, they had carpentry skills and attracted followings.
July 16th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
@futuremrs: Leave the guns in the bushes, bitch.
July 16th, 2008 at 3:18 pm
This guy wouldn’t last a week in Pittsburgh.
What? Before being raped by Steely McBeam?
July 16th, 2008 at 3:19 pm
If you can’t swallow?
Shut up, bitch. Gargle.
July 16th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
C’mon, you forgot the best one.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Andersen
July 16th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
I’m heavy in the street like the 7 series beamer.
July 16th, 2008 at 3:27 pm
/off-topic slightly
Found this quote on the Old Gray Lady after reading about that Eagles tool.
“Elisha brings sangria, Ian brings margaritas and David brings prosecco.”
I believe that quote alone confirms that Eli Manning is a flaming homosexual.
Oh and the Eagles birdman should have been drafted last week so he could be murdered slowly and painfully.
/carry on
July 16th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
Yeah, I have no defense for that.
July 16th, 2008 at 4:07 pm
Clipse=fire
Baby, not so much.
July 16th, 2008 at 4:11 pm
Agreed on the above…
July 16th, 2008 at 4:12 pm
…but I’ll defer to my colleague smurphette, as she is the hip-hop/rap expert. Me, I hold down the whiny/pretentious indie music beat.
/sips overpriced IPA; broods
July 16th, 2008 at 4:15 pm
WTF is going on today?
July 16th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Sorry, but I refuse to believe a hiphop artist who beatboxes out a pigeon coo isn’t an intricate spoof.
July 16th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
For the record, I am a Philly fan and I’ve hate “Birdman” since his first appearance at the Linc. He’s a fag. Just like Cowboys fans, Giants fans and Vikings fans. Motherfucker brings friends of his that are fans of the opponents. If I didn’t already have a felony on my record, I’d kill him.
July 16th, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Not only would this guy last a week in Pittsburgh, he would be the new owner of the Steelers.
July 16th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
Brady Quinn thinks this guy is too gay to be gay.
July 16th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
Not an expert, but I do enjoy the phat beats and ill rhymes. And I agree with Naptown Drew, as usual.
/sips pint of Smithwick’s
/not a huge fan of IPAs
July 16th, 2008 at 5:39 pm
Phatter beats and iller rhymes available here, here, here, and godawful homemade video aside, the opening Dead Prez samples from here.
No, no. Don’t thank me. Just enjoy.
July 16th, 2008 at 5:41 pm
If I didn’t already have a felony on my record…
Tell us something we don’t know about Philly sports fans.
/haha, just joking…
//hey WTF are you doing?
///runs like the wind
July 16th, 2008 at 6:34 pm
I hate to be that guy, but the typo in the title is starting to mock me.
Leprechaun.
July 16th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
This guy is embarassing, but the Eagles have an even worse annoying fan.
Shoulderpad Shaun, anyone? :P
July 16th, 2008 at 11:22 pm
I hate to be that guy, but the typo in the title is starting to mock me.
Check out the big brain on Brad.
F’n spell checker doesn’t work in the headline field and my ass is too lazy to look it up.
also, we must never forget
July 17th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Birdman (the rapper) gets a pass on the bird call shit with me since the stuff he does with Lil’ Wayne is sick
July 17th, 2008 at 12:22 pm
@Kitsune
I couldn’t agree more. ShoulderPad Shaun is 10 times more annoying that this guy. Shaun is not only arrogant, but he expects people to recognize him and kiss his butt everywhere he goes. The sad thing is, the guy is a garbageman from Delaware County who just happens to like facepainting and screaming at people.
Yet for some reason, he is seen as the “hardcore Eagles fan.” Birdman is annoying, but he comes nowhere close to the level of ShoulderPad Shaun. Besides, Birdman wasn’t one of the thirty people hired by Angelo Cataldi to boo McNabb at the 1999 draft.
August 8th, 2008 at 10:38 am
KSK is in the house and sure is making me laugh , Keep up the work , tommy