Praise to Xenu! I knew if I sat on my hands long enough a whiny clubhouse cancer would find its way to Redskins Park. We missed out on Ocho Cinco and we’re still trying to lure that gunslinging bumpkin from Kiln, Mississippi to replace our Lionel Richie-esque bumpkin at quarterback, but we landed at least one high-profile malcontent.

And this one might still have something left in the tank! This ain’t no Bruce Smith or Deion Sanders. He could be a Dana Stubblefield and a half! You’ve finally figured this football thing out, Danny you sly old tree-chopping dog!

Dipshit Redskins Fans: HAIL TO THE REDSKINS! HAIL VICTORY! BRAVES ON THE WARPATH! FIGHT FOR OL’ LARGO, MARYLAND!

Jason Taylor, the last component we need to improve from a 9-7 team that loses in the first round to a 10-6 team that loses in the first round! But we’ll do it as a 5-seed this year!

HEY! I’VE ALREADY GOT A TAYLOR JERSEY FROM LAST YEAR! DON’T EVEN NEED TO THROW THAT ONE OUT!

Update: Just in case that’s not enough Raljon-based obnoxiousness, the Dead Tree Crew was out with traffic cone beer bongs at the opening day of training camp. (courtesy a bald blogger at some bullshit newsrag)